Angelica Lost and Found

Chapter 12. Figs with Cream!

Vassily, his name is. A big man and no gentleman, reeking of Stolichnaya the same as on the night he attacked Doris. I knocked him out then, so why don’t I become my hippogriff self now and let him feel the weight of my talons?

Right! Here I go. Nothing happens, I’m still an invisible idea. Only a little while ago I was seeing off unwelcome suitors with my full self but suddenly I don’t know how to do it. Was there a magic word? Meanwhile Angelica was breathing in his stinking breath and looking at him with desire in her eyes.

All I could do was climb into his mind, and it was so swollen with his single intention that it was a tight squeeze.

‘Here I am,’ I gasped to Angelica. ‘Here is Volatore.’

‘What’s your name, handsome?’ she said playfully, as if sharing a joke with me.

‘Volatore, Volatore!’ I tried to say, but the name that came out was ‘Vassily’.

‘Sure you are, but you’re my Volatore, yes?’

‘Who’s Volatore?’ said Vassily.

‘You are, aren’t you?’ said Angelica.

‘I’ll show you who I am pretty quick as soon as we get out of the weather,’ said Vassily.

We, the three of us, went to where his red Mercedes was parked. It had doors that opened like wings.

‘Classy set of wheels,’ said Angelica. ‘This is a 300 SRL.’

‘You can depend on me for a good ride, golubchik,’ he said (I was unable to make myself heard).

‘I believe you, Volatore.’

‘Vassily, baby.’

‘OK, Vassily Baby.’

We got in and Vassily put his hand on her leg.

She put her hand over his.

‘Don’t be shy, Vassily Baby,’ she said, and moved his hand further up her thigh (I could do nothing). ‘Have we got time for a kiss and a cuddle right here?’ she said.

‘For this there is always time,’ said Vassily, and she came into his arms (I, Volatore, felt that hot embrace.) Tasting the sweet mouth of my erstwhile love, Vassily recalled a favourite dessert of his childhood: figs with cream. That was how she tasted, his delicious Angelica.

‘ “Wild thing!” ’ she said. ‘ “You make my heart sing!” ’ (This from the woman who had declared herself my love only moments ago. Was eternal Angelica forever unreliable?)

‘I’ll get to your other parts right away.’ (The coarseness of the man!) ‘Excuse me for just a moment,’ he said as he stopped the car. ‘Call of nature.’

Vassily stepped behind a bush, dropped his trousers, there was a little straining and I, Volatore, was expelled, hitting the ground as a full-size hippogriff. Then Vassily got back in the car and drove off with Angelica.

So easily had Vassily Baby disposed of Volatore the hippogriff!

I tried to revert to the mode in which I was idea without visible form but I was unable to do it. How had the Russian been able to expel me like that? Had the idea of me become so weak that an ordinary human was stronger than Volatore the hippogriff?

Fortunately the hour was late and there was no one about. If only I could fly out of this situation! But I had no winged words to lift me. Trying hard to think small, I crept away in the dark, cursing and whimpering, seeking a place to hide.