Barely Legal

13

Stone Barrington was at the desk in his home office tidying up legal matters when his secretary, Joan Robertson, poked her head in the door. “Dino on three.”

Stone picked up the phone. “Hi, Dino, what’s up?”

Dino wasn’t happy. “I have an ethical problem.”

“Wait until she’s eighteen.”

“Not that problem. The detectives investigating the shooting took Yvette’s information. I ran it, which I shouldn’t have done, I know. But I have, and now the question is — do I tell Herbie what I found?”

“Don’t tell me she’s a call girl.”

“Actually, yes.”

Stone laughed.

“What’s so funny?”

“Well, it means Herbie is running true to form.”

“Yeah, but in this case he doesn’t know it and he’s very happy. So what do I do?”

“What do you mean?”

“The question is, should we tell him?”

“Why spoil his fun?”

“You call that fun?”

“Well, it’s better than not having a date for the prom.”

“You don’t think he can interest another woman?”

“That’s not the point. He’s in love.”

“With a hooker.”

“Well, nobody’s perfect.”

“Stone.”

“I’m disappointed. Herbie was so happy at dinner. Then he’s shot at, shanghaied into court, and his girlfriend’s a hooker.”

“I could have a talk with her. Maybe she’s changed her ways.”

“Or you scare her off and break Herbie’s heart,” Stone said.

“It’s going to happen sooner or later.” Dino exhaled into the phone. “There’s something else.”

“What’s that?”

“She gave him an app for his iPad — Find My Phone.”

“What’s that?”

“If you misplace your iPhone, it tells you where it is.”

“With a beeping noise?”

“Yeah.”

“Can’t you just call it?”

“Not if the ringer’s off. This thing tells you even if the ringer’s off. And if your phone happens to be in the next county, it shows you on a map.”

“That’s great.”

“Yeah, but—”

“But what?”

“Kind of funny thing to give a guy.”

“It actually sounds practical.”

“Yeah, for her. If she has his iPad, she can open the app and tell exactly where he is at any given time.”

“Wouldn’t he have his iPad?”

“Do you take yours to dinner? So she can check on him. Even if she doesn’t have his iPad, if she just has his account and password, she can call it up on hers.”

“Why would she need that?”

“I don’t know. Maybe so he won’t come home while she’s boffing the cable guy.”

“Oh, gee,” Stone said. “Why do you always think the worst of people?”

Dino shrugged. “I’m a cop.”

Yvette came out of La Perla with a smile on her lips and a credit card in her purse. Being engaged to Herbie Fisher was a very nice gig. She’d taken the job on, researched it well, knew everything there was to know about the man. Even the fact that he was Herbie Fisher when he won the lottery, and was Herb Fisher now. She called him Herbie, which was a pet name for her, and at the same time a subconscious reminder of the old days before the lottery when he used to be wild. He’d won thirty million. He’d run through half of it, but half remained, plus the generous salary he pulled in from his partnership at Woodman & Weld. If she could just keep him on the string until they were married, she’d be on easy street.

Hell, she was on easy street now. Being engaged to Herbie was a particularly nice job.

Yvette had just stepped off the sidewalk when she felt a hand on her shoulder.

She spun around and gasped. “You!”

The young man grinned. “Hi, sweetie.”

“Donnie! What are you doing here?”

“I got lonely.”

Whereas Yvette had cleaned up her act for the Herbie sting, her boyfriend, Donnie, hadn’t cleaned up his at all. He looked like exactly what he was, a low-life creep.

“Donnie, we talked about this. You have to stay away.”

“Why?”

“Because you want money, Donnie. Lots and lots of money.”

“I want some now.”

“Soon, sweetie. We’re so close.”

Donnie grinned, the shit-eating grin she somehow found adorable. “I’ve had some minor setbacks. You know how it is.”

Yvette took a wallet out of her purse. She pulled open the billfold part. She had a hundred and thirty-six dollars. “Here you go, sweetie. Take the hundred, leave me the rest.”

Donnie folded the hundred and stuck it in his pocket. He put his arm around her waist. “I’m still lonely.”

She twisted out of his grasp. “I know, honey. It won’t be long.”

“You put that app on his phone, like I told you?”

“Yes, I did, just like you said.”

“So where is he?”

Yvette took out her iPhone and turned on the app. “He’s in court.”

“Excellent,” Donnie said. He grabbed her again. “So you have some free time.”

“And nowhere to go,” Yvette said.

“Don’t some of these stores have changing rooms?”

She batted his hand away. “Stop it, Donnie.”

“Oh, little Miss Goody Two-shoes.” His face got crafty hard. “Anything you want to tell me?”

“What do you mean?”

“Anything you haven’t told me yet? You’re so worried I’m going to get careless and blow the gig, I wondered if you had any of the same doubts about yourself.”

Yvette practically cooed. “I am playing this so well, honey. He’s wrapped around my finger. You wouldn’t believe it.”

“Anything you’re leaving out?”

“No.”

“How about getting picked up by the police last night?”

Yvette’s mouth fell open. “How do you know that?”

“I know everything. How’d you manage to let that happen?”

“I didn’t let that happen. Someone took a shot at me.”

“And you couldn’t get the hell out of there? You sat and waited for the cops to come?”

“I had to. The commissioner of police was sitting there when the shooting started. Who I’d just been introduced to. I should slip out on him?”

“It doesn’t matter what the situation. You never give your name to the police.”

“It’s all right.”

“Oh, yeah? Suppose they pull your record?”

“They won’t.”

“Why not? They’re cops.”

“I’m Herbie’s fiancée. I’m not a suspect. I was sitting next to him when someone fired a shot.”

“Who was it, by the way?”

“I have no idea.”

“Who hates the guy?”

“Beats me. Perfectly nice guy.” She shrugged. “Of course, he’s a lawyer. Lawyers make enemies.”