INSIDE THE KITCHEN, THEY SIT at the same butcher-block table where Scarpetta talked to Mrs. Guidon on a night Scarpetta scarcely remembers.
"I got in too deep," Benton is saying.
They are sitting across from each other.
"It was here, in this place of theirs, where a lot of the major players come to do their dirty business at the port and the Mississippi. Rocco. Weldon Winn. Talley. Even Jean-Baptiste."
"You've met him?"
"Many times," Benton says. "Here in this house. He found me amusing and much nicer to him than the others were. In and out, you name it. Guidon was the matron of the manor, you might say. As bad as the rest of them."
"Was?"
Benton hesitates. "I saw Winn go into the wine cellar. I didn't know the others were in there, thought maybe Jean-Baptiste was, hiding. It was her and Talley. I had no choice."
"You killed them."
"I had no choice," Benton repeats.
Scarpetta nods.
"Six years ago, another agent was working with me, Minor. Riley Minor. Supposedly from around here. He did something stupid, I'm not sure what. But they did their number on him." Benton nods in the direction of the wine cellar. "The torture chamber, where they make everybody talk. There are old iron rings in the walls from the slave days, and Talley was fond of heat guns and other means of deriving information. Quickly.
"When I saw them dragging Minor into the cellar, I knew the operation was over and I got the hell away."
"You didn't try to help him?"
"Impossible."
She is silent.
"If I hadn't died, I would have, Kay. If I hadn't died, I could never have been around you, Lucy, Marino. Ever. Because they would have killed you, too."
"You are a coward," she says, drained of emotion.
"I understand your hating me for all I made you suffer."
"You could have told me! So I wouldn't suffer!"
He looks at her for a long moment, remembers her face. It hasn't changed much. None of her has.
"What would you have done, Kay, had I told you my death had to be faked and I would never see you again?" he asks.
She doesn't have the answer she thought she might. The truth is, she wouldn't have allowed him to vanish, and he knows it. "I would have taken my chances." Grief closes her throat again. "For you, I would have."
"Then you understand. And if it's any consolation, I've suffered. Not a day has gone by when I didn't think of you."
She shuts her eyes and tries to steady her breathing.
"Then I couldn't take it anymore. Early on I became so miserable, so goddamn angry, and I began to figure away. Like chess…"
"A game?"
"Not a game. I was very serious. One by one, to eliminate the major threats, knowing that once I came out, I could never go back, because if I failed, I would be recognized. Or simply killed during the process."
"I have never believed in vigilantism."
"I suppose you can talk to your friend Senator Lord about that. The Chandonnes heavily fund terrorism, Kay."
She gets up. "Too much, too much for one day. Too much." She glances up, suddenly remembering Albert. "Is that little mistreated boy really Charlotte Dard's son?" Yes.
"Please don't tell me you're his father."
"Jay Talley is. Was. Albert doesn't know that. He's always been given this mysterious line about a very prominent but busy father he's never met. A kid's fantasy. He still believes he has this omnipotent father somewhere. Talley had a brief affair with Charlotte. One night while I was here, there was a garden party and Charlotte invited an acquaintance, an antiques dealer…"
"I know," Scarpetta says. "At least that question will be answered."
"Talley saw her, spoke to her, went to her house. She resisted him, which is something he won't tolerate. He murdered her, and because Charlotte had seen the two of them together, and because Talley was tired of Charlotte, bored with her, he saw to it that she died. Met her, brought her pills."
"The poor little boy."
"Don't worry," Benton says.
"Where are Lucy and Marino? Where are Rudy and Nic?" Now she remembers them.
"Picked up by a Coast Guard helicopter about half an hour ago. After raiding Bev Kiffin and Jay Talley's hideout."
"How do you know?"
He gets up from the table. "I have my sources."
Senator Lord enters Scarpetta's mind again. The Coast Guard is now Homeland Security. Yes, Senator Lord would know.
Benton moves closer to her, looking into her eyes. "If you hate me forever, I'll understand. If you don't want to be with me I don't blame… well, you shouldn't. Jean-Baptiste is still out there. He will come after me. Somehow."
She says nothing, waiting for the hallucination to pass.
"Can I touch you?" Benton asks.
"It doesn't matter who else is out there. I've been through too much."
"Can I touch you, Kay?"
She lifts his hands and presses them against her face.