Mr. Theo delivered a few days later. “Have you had any more problems?”
I glanced down at the slip of paper that held my new locker assignment. “No. Three days without a single thing.”
“I’m happy to hear that. I have to admit, seeing that rabbit even freaked me out a little bit. It made me question taking this job in West Virginia.” He pushed his glasses up his nose, grinning. The act reminded me so much of Adam my heart clenched.
“Yeah, I guess it was just some sick prank to welcome the new girl or something.”
“To be honest with you, I don’t believe that was some kind of harmless prank.” He met my eyes.
“People just don’t do that kind of thing.”
It felt good to know someone else didn’t appear as easily fooled or hopeful as Hayden. He, by the way, still refused to even consider that one of his adopted family members could have had anything to do with it. “I know,” I finally said, “but nothing else has happened.”
“Well, if anything does I want you to feel comfortable coming to me or another faculty member.
Okay?”
The strange thing about Mr. Theo was that I did feel comfortable enough to tell him. Heck, I felt like I could confide in him. Which was odd, because who felt like they could talk—really talk—to any of their teachers? Maybe it was because he was so young, more like an older brother than an authority figure.
I shifted the backpack to my other shoulder. “Okay. Thanks again for the new locker. I really appreciate it.” Something small and shiny caught my eye—a silver coin next to his grade book. I don’t know what got into me. I never touched things on teachers’ desks; there were rules against that sort of thing, but it was like I felt compelled. I picked it up, slowly turning it over in my hand. A carousel was imprinted on one side and the words Ex mente were engraved on the other. The coin felt heavy and warm in my hand.
“My lucky charm,” Mr. Theo said, leaning back in his chair. “Not sure if it works, but I like to think it does.”
“Oh.” I flicked it over with my thumb. “What do these words mean?”
“The words are ‘from the mind’ in Latin. I believe all great things come from the mind.” He opened his schedule planner, glancing up at me. “You can keep it.”
“Oh, no.” My cheeks flushed. “I couldn’t do that. It’s your lucky charm.”
He waved his hand. “I don’t need it. Take it. Maybe you could use the good luck.”
I started to argue, but I realized I could use the luck. Hayden had said he wanted to start working with my… ability after school today.
I had no idea what he had planned, but I figured I could use all the luck in the world.
An abrupt wave of dizziness washed over me. Blinking, I took a step back and slid the coin in the pocket of my hoodie. I guess I was more freaked out about the secret training session than I realized.
“Thanks,” I mumbled.
“No problem. Just take care of it.” Then he turned back to his planner, checking off something.
I hurried to my next class, and the rest of the day kind of went like that. Every so often I’d feel dizzy and nervous. Hayden noticed, but didn’t push it. I think he knew I was worried about tonight. He had this huge faith that my “gift” could be controlled.
He had no clue.
I shuffled into bio just as the last bell rang. From his seat, Hayden watched me with raised brows as I darted to my chair. I felt my ears turn pink.
“Pop quiz,” Coach Ashford announced, handing out several sheets with the vaguest questions I’d ever seen. “Eyes on your own papers, kids.”
“Quiz on what?” Cory muttered.
“I think the cell nucleus stuff,” I said.
“Huh?”
I pointed at the last slide that was still up from yesterday. “I’m guessing that.”
“What would I do without my new lab partner? I’d be lost.” He grinned and nudged my hand with his pencil.
I jerked back so hard the chair screeched across the floor. Coach Ashford looked up with a frown from whatever sports magazine he had his nose stuck in. So did several kids from the front of the class.
Hayden sent me a puzzled look.
“Hey. Sorry. I didn’t mean to scare you,” Cory said.
I had to catch my breath. “Yeah, I’m a little jumpy.”
“Hey! Hey! No talking or I take the slide down,” Coach said.
Groans sounded and even a few death glares were directed at us. I started scribbling down answers as my heart thundered.
I had the gloves on, but it’d still caught me off guard. At my old school, no one casually touched me. It was like I was a carrier of the plague—at least up until the night Dustin had touched me outside the grocery store.
I shuddered.
Coach got up, walking down the aisles. “Time’s up. Pass them over.”
Cory reached over, almost brushing my arm as he grabbed my quiz. My anxiety level spiked through the roof. Clenching my hands, I glanced up and saw Hayden turned around in his seat, dark eyes fixed on me.
What? I mouthed at him.
He looked pointedly at Cory before he turned back around.
“We start a new section on Monday,” Coach announced toward the end of class. “We are moving on to human—” He paused, glancing down at his notes. “Anatomy? Yep. That’s it.”
After the bell rang, I nearly tackled Hayden outside the classroom. “What’s up with the look you gave me?”
His smile was dazzling, overly innocent. “What are you talking about?”
I struggled to keep up with his long-legged pace. “Did you think I was going to touch—?”
“More like, did I think Cory was going to touch you?” he asked as we stopped at our lockers. “Cory was getting way too friendly with those hands.”
With a decent amount of dread, I slowly opened my locker. Nothing inside. Relief coursed through me. Day four and no dead things equaled awesome. “He tapped me with his pencil. I don’t call that friendly. And I have my gloves on.” I wiggled my fingers.
“Whatever.” He slammed his locker shut, hands empty. He never took books home.
I wondered how, and if, he passed any of his classes.
Half an hour after dinner, Hayden led me outside through the garage. “Where are we going?” I asked.
“You’ll see.”
I raised my brows as he headed straight for the dense tree line. “We’re going in there?”
Hayden chuckled. “Yes.”
“Why?” I hurried to catch up with him.
“We need somewhere private, where we don’t have to worry about anyone walking in on us.”
My stomach went all fluttery. “There’s, like, a hundred rooms in that house.”
“There aren’t a hundred rooms, and I don’t want someone busting in on us.”
The fluttering went up a notch. “We aren’t going to get caught out here?” I shivered in my sweater while Hayden, in only a thin shirt, seemed unfazed by the brisk air. “Or attacked by Bigfoot?”
He laughed. “We aren’t staying in the woods, Ember. We’re going to the hunting cabin.”
“Hunting cabin?”
“Yep. Some of the others use it, but I’ve pretty much taken it over. It’s a good place to get away from stuff.”
“Oh, well that—shit!” Not paying attention to where I was walking, I stumbled, my foot getting snagged in a gnarled tree root.
Hayden spun around and caught my shoulders before I ate dirt. He got me standing on my feet again, an uneven grin on his face.
“Thanks,” I mumbled.
“You’ve got to be careful. There are a lot of holes and upturned roots in the ground.”
“Now you tell me.”
His grin spread, and I noticed then that Hayden was still holding me. And we stood so close my sneakers brushed his shoes. I lifted my head, bewildered by the sudden desire for him to pull me against him again. Our eyes met. There was a long stretch of silence as we stared at each other. What was I thinking?
And why wasn’t I moving away?
A wild sort of smile appeared for a moment before he dropped his hands and backed off. “Come on.
We just have a little bit more to go. I think you’ll like it. No one but us knows it’s even out here.”
I shoved my hands in my hoodie, my fingers immediately finding the odd coin. I clenched it and ignored how fast my heart pounded. A good twenty minutes later, a cozy-looking log cabin came into view. Surrounded by tall trees and thick brushes, the cabin was even more isolated than the house.
Grinning, Hayden dug his keys out of his pocket and unlocked the door. A musty smell that reminded me of family camping trips and the aroma of coffee beans greeted me as I followed him in. He dropped the keys on a small table and started lighting candles with a lighter he pulled from his pocket.
“The cabin hasn’t had electricity for a while.” Hayden explained as the flame danced across his face.
“I use the pellet stove if I’m here in the winter.”
“Do you come here a lot?”
“Not that much lately, but I used to. It’s quiet out here.” He paused. “Anyway, what do you think of it?”
When he was done, soft light ate away at the darkness and revealed a rather large room outfitted with a small kitchen, an antique-looking couch, and a… a bed. Nervously, I turned away and folded my arms.
The place reminded me more of a love-nest than anything else. Then again, the stockpile of rifles hanging on the wall kind of ruined the cozy feel.
“It’s nice.”
“Strange,” Hayden moved past me, toward the bed.
My heart flip-flopped. “What?”
“Someone’s been here.” He stopped at the bed, frowning.
I didn’t know what he’d seen that gave it away, but whatever. “Do you think someone will find us here?”
He glanced up. “No. Parker’s the only one who ever really comes down here. Cabins aren’t Phoebe’s thing.”
“What about Gabe?”
“No television means no Gabe.” His eyes met mine. Midnight had nothing on them; they were that dark.
I bit my lip. “So what do you have in mind?”
His eyes still held mine. “I have a lot of things in mind.”
All the air left my lungs. I felt dizzy. “Really?”
A wolfish grin flashed across his striking face before he turned and grabbed a potted plant. “Training, Ember. Grab a seat.”
Feeling like an idiot, I opted for the couch while Hayden grabbed a wooden chair from the small table and placed it in front of me. Then he sat down, knees pressed again mine, plant in his lap.
“Take off the gloves.”
I didn’t want to, but I did. Taking a deep breath, I laid them next to me. “What do you expect me to do?”
“Just touch it.”
Leaning back, I met his dark gaze. “Why?”
“Are you going to give me a hard time?” He sighed. “Ember, if we have any hope of getting this to work, you have to do what I say.”
“You hope this is going to work. Not me. I deal in reality.”
Hayden arched a brow. “Ember, you don’t even know what reality is. You know nothing about gifts.”
I rolled my eyes, but didn’t say anything.
He looked sort of smug.
“Fine, then educate me. How are you the way you are—what makes you gifted?”
Hayden slid his palms over the ceramic pot. “A normal person uses only a small portion of the brain at any given time. We use all of our brain at once. Hook any of us up to an MRI machine when we are using our gifts, and it’s like the Fourth of July. It’s not the best evidence, but it’s all they’ve ever been able to find. It’s the only thing different between us and outsiders.”
“Who’s ‘they’?”
The look on his face grew distant and cold—shuttered. “The Facility has searched for years to find out why we’re gifted. So has my father, and even though the twins are both gifted, Cromwell has said it isn’t typically hereditary.”
Because if it was hereditary, then Cromwell wouldn’t need to intervene with parents as often. My stomach twisted.
“Any more questions? If not, I’d like to see what we can get done tonight.”
“Sure. Let’s do this.”
“Touch the plant, Ember.”
I wasn’t sure what the purpose of this was, but oh, well. I brushed my fingertips across the velvety leaf.
For a moment, nothing happened. Then the leaf shuddered. The outer ridges curled inward as the vibrant green faded to a dull, crispy brown. Death flowed through the rest of the plant, and within seconds, nothing was left but a dried-up stem hanging limply to the side.
There was a sharp intake of breath, and at once, I felt ashamed. Awful. Monstrous. “Okay,” he said a few moments later. “What were you thinking?”
“I don’t know. I really wasn’t thinking anything.”
“You had to be thinking something, Ember.”
I shifted down, feeling for the coin in my pocket. Holding it my hand was kind of comforting. “I guess I was thinking about what you wanted me to do.”
“Okay. What else?”
“That’s all. I mean, I could’ve been thinking about other things, I guess.”
“Like what?” Hayden stood and walked toward the little kitchen area. In front of a large picture window, several plants basked in the fading sunlight. He picked a flower, one blooming with pretty, white and pink petals.
Closing my eyes, I forced myself to concentrate. “School. Olivia. The dead rabbit. Why Cromwell really has everyone here. Mom and Dad.” I paused, sliding a look at the bed. Never being able to touch someone. Dying a virgin. Was the pimple on my forehead still the size of a village? “All kinds of stuff.”
“Okay.” Hayden sat back down, and his knees once again pressed mine. “That’s a lot going on.”
I snorted. “Sorry.”
He grinned. “Try to empty all of that out. Get rid of it. When you aren’t thinking about anything, touch the plant again.”
I sighed. “It’s such a pretty flower.”
His lips twitched as if he fought a smile. “You ready?”
I shook my shoulders and tried not thinking about anything, but it was really hard. My brain spewed stuff out randomly, but I tried. When I thought my brain seemed appropriately empty, I leaned forward.
The movement pressed our knees together even more. Crazy as it sounded, I swore I could feel the heat of his skin through the clothing, warming me.
“Ember?”
I ran my fingers over the plant. Like it was laughing in my face, the colorful blossoms went first. Pink and white petals broke off, and by the time they hit the soil, they’d turned brown. Ugh. I really was Death in sneakers.
“What were you thinking?” Hayden asked.
“Nothing.”
“We always have something running in the back of our thoughts. What’s running behind yours?”
Right now I was thinking about how nice his eyes looked, but I’d shave my head before I admitted that. “I don’t know. Nothing’s running in the background.”
Hayden placed the plant on the floor. His knee slipped from mine and ended up against my thigh. Fine shivers coursed down my legs.
“Try to concentrate, Ember. There is always a thought to every action. Like something on repeat.”
I really didn’t want to share the thought I had on repeat right now. My cheeks felt on fire. I don’t even know what was wrong with me, why I continued to think about him.
Hayden straightened, his knee sliding back. His eyes caught mine and sparked. “Let’s do this again.”
“Sure,” I stuttered.
We went on like this for a while. I’d kill another innocent plant. Hayden would ask what I was thinking. His leg would flirt with mine. I’d tell him I wasn’t thinking anything, and he would say something impossibly motivational.
A plant holocaust later, Hayden called it quits. “We’ll try again tomorrow. You’re doing really well.”
From my slumped position, I raised my brows. “Oh, really?”
He smiled back at me, nodding. “You look tired.”
Tired? More like exhausted, and I still had homework to do. Letting my head fall back, I closed my eyes. Minutes went by like this, and I only knew Hayden was still there because his legs pressed against mine. Maybe that’s why I wasn’t jumping to do homework.
“I really did try, you know?” I said.
“I know.”
“I’m one giant fail. Maybe there isn’t anything you can do. This is just how I’m gonna be, like, a ‘you break, you buy’ kind of thing.”
Hayden’s laugh rumbled all the way through me. “What?”
I opened my eyes and tipped my head forward. His smile was a big one—the one that reached his eyes, warming them into pools of liquid chocolate. Suddenly, it was like waking up or just realizing something huge.
But I had no idea what I’d realized.
He leaned forward and propped his elbows on his knees. Several locks of hair fell forward as he rested his chin in his hands. “You have to explain that one to me.”
“You know how you go into stores and they have those signs that say ‘If you break it, you buy it’? I kinda live by that. If I touch someone, I kill them. So it’s kind of the same thing.”
He cocked an eyebrow. “You think the strangest things.”
“You think so?” Out of curiosity, I mimicked his earlier movements. Our faces were merely inches apart. Anyone in their right mind would move.
Hayden didn’t.
“What is it with you?” I asked. “You don’t seem afraid to get close to me. Even people who don’t know what I can do—outsiders—are afraid to be close to me. Like they can somehow sense I’m Death.” I paused. “Or maybe it’s my eyes. They freak people out.”
The smile faded from his lips. “Why would I be afraid? I know you aren’t going to hurt me, and if you did touch me, I could always stop it.”
I made a face. “You said you wouldn’t do that again.”
He inched closer. “Yeah, I did say that.”
“So you wouldn’t flip it on me if I touched you right now?”
“No.”
“For real?”
“Yup.”
I moved one hand and brought it to his cheek. I didn’t touch him, because seriously, I wasn’t psycho or anything. I wanted to call his bluff. Any second now he’d jerk back, but for just a moment, I got to see his eyes do the color thing, and then he closed them. His face impossibly relaxed.
“Are you going to do it or not?” he asked me.
Dumbfounded, I dropped my hand. “You’re nuts.”
He opened one eye. “No. It would hurt eventually, if you held on. But you wouldn’t hold on.”
“You don’t know that. Look at what happened to—”
“That wasn’t your fault.” Hayden shifted forward, wrapping his hands around my arms. “You know, I could say the same thing about you.”
My gaze dropped to his hands. The brief moments that his skin had touched mine were too easy to recall, and now, his hands were so close to my bare wrists. “How so?”
“My gift will knock you off your feet, but I don’t see you running for the door.” His hands moved to cup my elbows. “You’re not afraid of me.”
“But… you wouldn’t do that to me.”
A small grin tugged his lips. “Ember, you don’t know me as well as I know you.” His hands drifted up to my shoulders before sliding back down to the cuffs of my sweater, as if he was trying to warm me up.
He was.
His touch, even though it wasn’t against my skin, was doing strange things to me—affecting me in a way that created a warm flush all over my body. I struggled to find something intelligent to say. I came up with zilch. So I settled on a question that had been bugging me. “Why did you keep coming back to see me, Hayden?”
“You interested me.”
“That’s all? You traveled how many hours because I interested you?”
His lips pursed. “Because I knew what it’s like to be an outcast. There was a long time when I was… alone. So I know how it feels.”
To be lonely, I guessed. Something we had in common.
“And it was more than that.” He paused, looking uncomfortable. “And I know it sounds creepy—”
“Yeah, total creeper.”
He frowned, but it didn’t reach his eyes. They seemed to dance. “You’re not helping. I’m trying to admit something embarrassing here.”
“All right, go ahead,” I said, fighting a smile.
“Well, I was worried about you. I… wanted to make sure you were okay. There was just so much you were dealing with. I wanted to help.”
Impulsively, I closed my eyes while he talked and allowed myself to enjoy the feeling of his hands running over my arms. There was no harm with this. A sweater separated our skin and I wasn’t breaking my no-touch policy.
“Looking back, I’m sure there was something I could have done. Money or…”
“Or what?”
Hayden was quiet for what seemed like an eternity. “Find a way to make those kids pay for being so mean to you.”
I shivered. Not because of what he said, but because, well, I was pretty sure there was something he’d wanted to do. Like, say, blow up their houses—or them. “Why did you finally talk to me the day in the library?”
“I don’t know,” he said quietly. “You just looked so sad each time I saw you. And I knew you’d seen me in the school. I just wanted to talk to you after that.”
“You quoted Oscar Wilde.” I smiled.
Hayden laughed. “Yeah, that was, like, the height of geekdom.”
“No. It was kind of cool.”
We lapsed into silence. He kept up the thing with his hands, repeatedly coming dangerously close to my skin. After a while, my arms tingled, kind of like when our skin had touched before, but not as overwhelming. When I finally reopened my eyes, Hayden had this serious look on his face. “What?” I murmured.
Shaking his head, he dropped his hands and stood. I felt the loss of him. “You know what the sad thing is? You trust me, and you don’t even trust yourself.”
I stared up at him. He was so right. “I don’t trust your father.”
“I know.” A glimmer of a smile appeared. “But maybe one day you can learn to trust him… and yourself.”
“Probably ain’t going to happen.” Hayden crossed his arms. “Why?”
I shrugged. The dude was his dad, so it wasn’t like I could tell him that I thought Cromwell was skeevy. So I said nothing.
“You ready?” he asked, letting the subject fall to the side.
I nodded, and we made our way back through the dark woods in silence. At night, the forest took on an almost surreal atmosphere, one where all kinds of critters waited in the bushes. Needless to say, I felt ecstatic when we stepped into the house.
Hayden headed off to his room, but I stopped him with two words. “I’m sorry.”
He flipped around, head cocked to the side. “Sorry about what?” I bit my lip. “I’m sorry for what I said to you before. When you said you were here for me and I said that meant nothing.”
He waited.
Flushing, I ran my hands over my arms like he had. The feeling was so not the same. “It was rude.”
“You were upset.” Hayden shrugged, a troubled look pulling at his face. “Adam… was everything to you.”
I flinched. Adam was nothing to me now. “Anyway, I’m sorry.”
Hayden nodded. “It’s all forgiven, Ember. Friends?”
I felt my lips curve. “Friends.”