Dismember

FIFTEEN

Libby pulled the Honda into the garage and shut it off with a slow turn of the key. For a while, she simply sat there, leaning back in her seat with her eyes closed, listening to the car’s engine click as it cooled. She and Trevor had left the house that afternoon around one, and although it was just past seven now, it seemed she’d been away for days. She thumbed the button on the remote clipped to her visor and waited until the garage door had rolled all the way down to the concrete and thumped in place before letting herself out of the car.

She considered leaving her shopping bags in the trunk—she could always come out and get them later—but then she remembered the books she’d picked up and her earlier thoughts of slipping into a nice warm bath, glass of wine in one hand and a paperback in the other, maybe with some music drifting in from the stereo in the bedroom.

Yes. Throw in some bath salts and a few unscented candles, and she’d have herself the perfect evening.

Libby jammed a key into the trunk and popped it open, reached inside for her bags and pushed the lid shut again.

Except she didn’t think wine would cut it. Maybe she’d bring up a bucket of ice and beer instead. She had an untouched six-pack of Corona in the back of the fridge and thought there might also be a lime in the bottom drawer with the apples and oranges. If there had ever been a night to indulge in a little heavier-than-usual drinking, surely this was it. Although at one point during the day she’d intended to come home and put in a couple of hours of work, she’d already been second guessing the idea before she’d lost Trevor. She’d decided on the drive home that any work she did now would have been worthless anyway and that she might as well go ahead and take off the whole day.

She let herself into the kitchen through the connecting door, shut off the garage light behind her, and deposited the shopping bags on the counter beside the half-full sink of dishes. She’d have to run the dishwasher soon, but that could wait for later, too. She hung her keys on the hook beside the fridge and carried her purse with her into the living room, where the newly repositioned leather sofa waited like an open-armed lover.

Libby dropped face first onto the cushions and let out a long, tense sigh. The sofa sighed back, the cushions compressing beneath her and making a low burping sound when she turned lazily onto her side. To think, none of this mess would have happened today if she’d just let Mike come and pick up Trevor, if she hadn’t been so afraid of what he’d think of her redecorating.

Way to go, she thought. She let her purse drop from her fingers to the floor beside the couch and reached up to give her face a slow massage.

She hadn’t turned on the living room lights. As the daylight filtering in through the windows continued to wane, the room dimmed around her. The couch was so soft and the lighting so relaxing that Libby almost fell asleep right there and then, forgoing the bath and the beer and the paperback, would have fallen asleep if not for a car whizzing by outside and the glare of its headlights coming in through the living room windows.

Libby groaned, pushed herself into a sitting position, and finally stood.

On her way upstairs, she found a pair of Trevor’s action figures pushed to the edge of one of the steps. She’d told him a hundred times not to leave his things on the stairs, that someone might trip and really get hurt, but she guessed little boys just weren’t programmed to remember certain rules no matter how many times you told them. It would be one thing if he’d disobeyed her on purpose, but she was sure he’d just forgotten. Despite what had happened at the Mountain View, she knew Trevor was probably a better boy than most moms could ever expect to have, and not, as the mall security guard had suggested, an untrained pup.

Besides, at least he’d pushed the toys to the side, where they were unlikely to get underfoot. Libby reached down to pick them up and carried them with her to the second floor.

Trevor’s room wasn’t exactly spic and span—rumpled bed sheets covered the mattress, a pile of his clothes filled one corner, and several of his coloring books and his tub of crayons lay on the floor where he’d left them—but neither was it a total pigsty. Although she and Mike had always tried to instill a sense of cleanliness in their son, neither of them had ever been obsessive, and they hadn’t wanted to bring up Trevor like a couple of museum curators, making him afraid to touch anything and uncomfortable in his own room. They’d always believed a house was for living in, not for displaying, and if that meant the occasional coloring book on the floor or the previous day’s outfit piled in the corner, so be it.

She arranged the action figures on top of Trevor’s bookshelf, which was mostly filled with magazines and comic and coloring books, along with several first- and second-grade readers. Trevor had mastered his reading skills very early, much sooner than many of his classmates, and although he was only headed for the first grade come fall, he now read at a third-grade level. The school had talked about skipping Trevor a grade, but Libby suggested they wait at least another year. Trevor liked school, had made some good friends, and she didn’t want to push him too fast. Besides, although he’d shown a talent for reading, she knew it was something that simply came easily to him and not a sign that he was trying to surge his way through the school system any faster than the rest of the kids. She was also well aware that he still preferred the pictures in his comic books to anything Dick, Jane, and their dog, Spot, had to offer.

Libby had gotten one of the action figures into a standing position, but the other didn’t want to stay upright. After only a second try at getting the uncooperative toy to balance, Libby gave up and let the little guy rest on his back. Five minutes after Trevor came home, the thing would be in the bathtub or the laundry hamper or back on the stairs again anyway.

Smiling, she returned the coloring books and the crayons to the bookshelf, took the pile of clothes from the corner of the room, and headed for the utility room.

She came to the open door of her dark office, looked inside. Her laptop’s power light pulsed, which meant it was not off but merely asleep. Work was only the flip of a lid and a few keystrokes away, but she resisted the urge to enter the room.

Besides her website work, she also did some occasional consulting for a graphics firm based out of Denver. When helping out with one of those jobs (designing a law firm’s new letterhead or a company’s revamped logo), she often had deadlines to meet and customers to please, but none of her current projects were in any dire need of attention, and she’d already decided to let it go. At least for tonight.

She moved on to the utility room, threw Trevor’s clothes on top of the washer and promised herself she’d get to them later. Like the dirty dishes. Like her work.

The master bathroom called to her.

She turned on a bedroom lamp and sorted through the stack of CDs on top of the dresser until she found the new Paul McCartney album, which she inserted into the stereo and set to repeat. The music came softly from the stereo’s small speakers, mellifluous and perfect for her current mood. She turned it up just a notch, loud enough to hear from the bathroom, but not so loud that it would disrupt her reading once she’d gotten into the bath.

She crossed the room, the hardwood floor cool beneath her bare feet, slipped out of her pants and tossed them gently on the unmade bed.

She smiled. A coloring book or two and a couple of action figures and she’d be worse than her son. She left her shirt on for the time being, readjusted the waistline of her bikini briefs, and moved onto the bathroom tile, which felt noticeably cooler than the hardwood.

She wasn’t normally much of a bath person, though mostly because she rarely had time for such niceties. A quick run through the shower was usually about the best she could expect, and even then she sometimes had to simultaneously brush her teeth and shave her legs to get everything done in the available timeframe. She had expected the tub to be too dirty to use, covered in soap scum and strands of shed hair, but it actually looked surprisingly clean. She gave it a quick wipe down with a hand towel, just to be sure, and then plugged the drain and started the water. After fiddling with the knobs until she’d gotten the temperature just right, Libby wiped her hands on the towel and went in search of bath salts.

She found Epsom salts and some kind of eucalyptus beads she didn’t remember buying under the sink and decided to use a handful of each. She sprinkled them through the rising bathwater and dipped in a hand to double check the temperature.

Just right.

Before leaving the bathroom to fetch the rest of her bath-time goodies, Libby paused in front of the mirror to give herself a quick once over.

Fastened to the back of the bathroom door, the mirror gave her a full-body view. She stood with her back to the door and looked at her reflection from over her shoulder. Her legs looked long and trim, her bottom firm beneath the thin panties. She turned sideways and lifted her shirt. Stretch marks crisscrossed her tummy, left over from her fluctuating weight during and after her pregnancy, but the belly itself was flat and well muscled. Libby stepped closer and studied her face. The bags under her eyes were noticeable, but not outrageously so, and although it could have used a trim, her hair was as silky and sleek as it had ever been.

All in all, not bad. She might not be nineteen anymore, but she wasn’t exactly falling apart either.

She posed like a swimsuit model at the end of the runway, then pouted and blew herself a kiss.

Behind her, water bubbled. The tub was a quarter full already. She’d have to hurry or risk it spilling over the rim. It was an old tub with no overflow safety feature.

She ran through the bedroom, barely hearing the ex-Beatle end one song and begin another.

In the kitchen, she grabbed the beer, a lime and a paring knife, and the least-suspenseful-looking book of the three she’d brought home. She sifted through the junk drawer until she found a box of unused tea light candles and another box of matches.

Libby guessed that would do it. She juggled the items and walked out of the kitchen, not wanting to drop anything but also not wanting to dawdle. She heard the bath still running upstairs and knew it had to be getting awfully close to full. She didn’t want to spend her evening cleaning eucalyptus-scented water off her bathroom floor. The purpose of all this—the bath, the beer, the book, the music—was to relax, not add stress to an already stressful day.

She’d moved through the dark living room and up the first five stairs when the doorbell chimed behind her. She stopped mid-step and frowned.

“Hold on,” she said, setting the beer and the rest of her armload onto the stairs from which, not long ago, she’d removed her son’s toys. “Be right there.” She couldn’t answer the door without shutting off the faucet upstairs, and she definitely couldn’t answer dressed the way she was. Unless it happened to be her gynecologist at the door, she was showing just a little more crotch than was generally considered polite.

She ran to the master bathroom and shut off the water with what couldn’t have been more than a few seconds to spare. Before she got into the bath, she’d have to let some of the water drain out, but she’d worry about that later.

In the bedroom, she found a pair of scrub pants and slipped into them. The doorbell rang again, and Libby huffed. She’d said she’d be right there, hadn’t she? Jeez.

In her rush to get to the door, she almost forgot about the discarded items on the stairs. She’d have ended up with a foot in the ice bucket if she hadn’t seen it at the last second and avoided it with a carefully timed jump down two of the risers. She hit the landing beneath the stairway awkwardly, and the joints in her left ankle tensed.

The front door had a group of three windows set just above eye level, and through them Libby saw the very top of someone’s head bobbing in and out of view. Before opening the door, she engaged the security chain and hid most of herself behind the door so that only her eyes and the top of her own head would show through the narrow gap. Such measures were probably unnecessary and wouldn’t have done her much good if the doorbell ringer had been a shotgun-wielding maniac intent on blowing her away, but they made her feel safer just the same.

The man on her front stoop wasn’t a shotgun-wielding maniac, but Libby wasn’t sure he was much better. Seeing her through the opening, he smiled brightly and pushed forward a bouquet of wilted daisies.

“Hey,” he said. “Just thought I’d drop by.”

Libby closed the door and undid the chain, but before she opened up again, she closed her eyes and took a deep breath.

Why tonight?

Wondering how in the hell she’d get rid of him this time, she opened the door without smiling, accepted the flowers reluctantly, and motioned him in.