Hold On To Me

CHAPTER NINE

Mitch had to have heard Simone wrong.

“WITSEC? US marshals?” He gave his head a small shake, afraid the blow he’d taken when he’d been fighting that guy in his yard might have done some serious damage. “What the hell are you talking about?”

Simone gripped the couch cushion at her thighs, and opened her eyes. “Shannon and I left the witness protection program two and a half years ago after Steve died. I thought we were safe, but I was obviously wrong.”

Ryan moved to sit on the long arm of the leather sectional. “Witness protection? Holy cow.”

Simone didn’t look Mitch’s way. “I met Steve my last year of college. He was an accountant, working for a big company on the east coast.”

“Wait,” Mitch said from the direction of the wet bar. “I thought your husband was a lawyer.”

Simone flicked a guilty look his way, then refocused on the floor in front of her. “Technically, he was both. His specialty was corporate tax law. He passed the bar, but after he was hired by his firm they encouraged him to also get his CPA license. He spent more time doing their books than practicing law.”

Mitch felt like he’d been sucker punched all over again. She hadn’t just lied to him about her feelings, she’d lied about her entire life.

Stunned, he leaned back against the counter, thankful it was there to hold him upright. Part of him wanted to run and not listen to any more. Another part needed to hear the truth.

“I honestly don’t know much about the case,” Simone went on. “Steve and I had just started dating when it was all happening, and he told me the less I knew, the better off I’d be. All I know is that the managing partner of his firm was some bigwig in the northeast, and somehow Steve had come across evidence proving the firm was laundering money.”

She ran a hand through her hair, sending the already disheveled dark locks to fall against her pale cheeks. “It was a big case, with far-reaching implications that went beyond the firm, though Steve would never tell me where. And when his life was threatened before the trial, prosecutors offered him protection via WITSEC.”

Ryan braced his forearms against his thighs and clasped his hands together in front of him. “But you weren’t involved?”

Simone shook her head. “I didn’t know anything about it until much later. Steve had been acting funny, and we’d only been together a few months, so I didn’t know what to make of it. I went to talk to him one night and found him frantically throwing things in a backpack, getting ready to leave. That’s when he gave me a brief explanation of what was going on. And offered to take me with him.”

Mitch could barely believe what he was hearing. The calm, composed, totally reserved attorney he’d fallen for would never leap without looking. At least she never had with him. He crossed his arms over his chest. “I’m surprised you went.”

Simone finally looked his way, and he saw a mix of emotions in her eyes—hurt, regret, anger—he just couldn’t tell which one was meant for him. “I wouldn’t have. Not normally. But I’d just found out I was pregnant with Shannon. That’s why I went to talk to him that night. And I was already freaking out a little. When I found out what was going on, the marshals gave me five minutes to make a decision. Go with him or never see him again.”

Disbelief pulsed through Mitch’s veins. This woman he thought he’d known had given up her life for a man she barely knew, whereas all these months they’d been together, he’d had to fight tooth and nail to get her to do something as impulsive as blow off work for the day and hang out at the beach.

Ryan rested his hand on Simone’s arm. “Tell us what happened after the trial.”

Simone looked back down at her hands. “The three main managing partners were sentenced to fifteen years. But when Steve tried to step back into his old life, those far-reaching arms I was telling you about tried to have him killed. So they relocated us to Atlanta. I had Shannon, Steve got a job in financial planning, and when things settled down, I decided I wanted to go to law school. By the time I graduated, everything seemed…normal, so when I was offered a job in the Baltimore area, WITSEC gave us the go ahead to relocate. They got Steve another position, and everything seemed fine…until he got sick.”

She closed her eyes briefly, gave her head a swift shake, then opened them again. Her hands tightened around the seat cushion once more. “He wasn’t sick long. It came out of nowhere, and at first we didn’t know what was wrong. Test after test. When he finally got the diagnosis of pancreatic cancer, things went fast. Three weeks later, he was gone.”

She blinked several times and released her grip. “Since I was never involved in the case, WITSEC gave me the choice of remaining in the program or leaving. I had never been mentioned in any of the threats against Steve, nor was there ever any indication anyone from his old firm knew about me or Shannon. It had been nearly eight years with no incidents, so I opted to leave. We kept our new identities, moved out here, and started over. And I thought we were safe but”—she lifted her shoulders and dropped them in defeat— “now I know I was wrong.”

“Why do you think what happened tonight has anything to do with Steve’s case?” Ryan asked.

Simone slanted Ryan a look. “What else would it have to do with?”

“I know.” He smirked. “Dumb question. But humor me. You, yourself, said you weren’t a witness and that no one even knew about you.”

“Because I got a call a few days ago. The day I came back from DC. William Holdt was the US marshal assigned to my case. He sounded frantic. And he was apologizing for the fact they’d found out where I was.”

The day she’d come back from DC. Mitch thought back to the night she’d flown home. That was also the day she’d stomped all over his heart.

“What else did he say?” Ryan asked.

“Not a lot. But I freaked out. All I could think about was keeping Shannon safe. That’s why we were leaving. But then Shannon ran off, and a few days passed without anything happening, and I thought… stupidly…that maybe I’d overreacted. So I went over to your house tonight”—she motioned toward Mitch but didn’t look his way again—“to explain, when all hell broke loose.”

Something inside Mitch’s chest drew tight. Lies weren’t something he could usually forgive, but even he could see why Simone hadn’t been totally honest about her past. And when he thought back to the way she’d abruptly broken things off, her excuse about leaving town because her father was sick, and how frantic she’d been to get Shannon back, that anger inside started to crack.

“So you think the same people who were after Steve are now after you,” Ryan said.

Simone closed her eyes again. “I don’t know. All I know is if they were trying to flush me out, they did a damn good job, don’t you think?”

Ryan looked Mitch’s way, and Mitch caught the serious look in his brother-in-law’s blue gaze. Ryan believed her. And if the buzz growing in the pit of Mitch’s belly was any indication, he believed her too.

Which he wasn’t particularly thrilled about. Because as his brain spun, trying to find a solution to this, only one thought latched on and wouldn’t let go.

Whoever was after her now knew about him. They’d blown his property to pieces, not hers. He’d seen the face of one of the attackers, a face he was never going to be able to forget. Whether they’d targeted him because of his relationship with Simone or were simply following her and she’d inadvertently led them to him, he was now as embroiled in all of this as was she.

“Why can’t you call WITSEC and tell them what happened?” Ryan asked.

“I could,” Simone answered. “But…it gets complicated.”

“Complicated, how?” Ryan asked.

Simone flicked a wary look Mitch’s direction. And all that resentment reignited an anger he only barely held back.

“Because of me,” Mitch said. “Because as soon as you contact them, they’re going to put you and Shannon into protective custody again and recommend I go as well.”

“They know who you are now,” Simone said quietly. “These aren’t the kind of people who just…forget a name.”

Mitch crossed his arms over his chest. “I’m not giving up my life for this.”

“What are we talking here?” Ryan asked. “Mafia?”

“Sort of,” Simone answered. “Steve told me they were like the Mafia, but he never explained.”

“Like the mafia?” There was a whole lot more she wasn’t saying. And the fact she was holding back now only spurred Mitch’s growing frustration. “You’re a fucking lawyer. You should have asked a few key questions.”

Simone pushed to her feet, and for the first time since he’d awoken and found her kissing him, he saw anger instead of doubt. “I did ask questions, but Steve always evaded them. The less I knew, the better. That was his standard answer every time. Do you think I wanted any of this? I’ve been working my ass off to make the best of things since the moment I met him. And I tried to keep you out of all this. I told you I wasn’t looking for a relationship, remember? But you wouldn’t take no for an answer. You’re the one who pushed your way into this mess when I tried to keep you out of it.”

“Okay.” Ryan stood, holding out his hands to try to defuse the situation. “Relax. No one’s blaming you for anything, Simone.”

“You’re not, but he is.”

Ryan shot Mitch a scathing look, then turned and gripped Simone’s arms again, forcing her to focus on him. “Why don’t we call the marshal assigned to your case—Holdt?”

She flicked another irate look Mitch’s way, then drew in a calming breath. “I tried. More than once. His phone keeps going to voice mail. I didn’t think it was a big deal before, but after all this…” She swiped a hand across her forehead. “I’m not sure who to trust. If he gave someone my location, who else in WITSEC is compromised?”

“Why don’t you let me try,” Ryan said.

Simone stiffened. “You can’t tell him where we are.”

“I won’t.”

Simone hesitated, looked up at Mitch. But after several seconds, she pulled her phone from her pocket and paged through screens until she found the contact. “Here.”

Ryan pulled out his own cell, dialed, then held it up to his ear. After several seconds, he said, “Yeah, I’m trying to get in touch with Marshal William Holdt. No. Yeah, I can hold.”

As they waited, Mitch crossed to the floor-to-ceiling windows and looked out at the sparkling lights of the city far below. Witness protection. Mafia. His head was spinning. And every time he closed his eyes, he saw his house being blown to pieces.

“Okay, thanks.”

Ryan lowered the phone, hit End, and sighed. “Well, that’s not going to help us.”

“What did they say?” Simone asked.

Mitch turned from the window.

“William Holdt died yesterday.”

“No.” Simone’s eyes fell closed. Her face paled, and she lowered herself to the couch. “No, no, no.”

“It could just be a coincidence,” Ryan said quickly.

Simone huffed out a sound that held no humor. “Not unless my luck has changed.”

Ryan looked toward Mitch, and in his eyes, Mitch saw the same thing he was thinking. There was more to this than she was saying.

Ryan tapped the phone against his palm and looked back at Simone. “You were right to come here. We’ll figure something out.”

No, Mitch had been right to bring her here. Though at the moment, he wasn’t overjoyed by that decision.

“I don’t feel like it,” Simone muttered. “I feel like I just put you and Kate in danger too.”

“We’ll be fine. Don’t worry about us. Let me do a little research on Holdt and see what I can find.”

Simone didn’t answer, just nodded and rested her head back against the couch. And in the silence, Mitch wrestled with a mixture of anger and helplessness and feelings of utter stupidity.

The mafia? He really hoped to hell that wasn’t what this was, because he wasn’t giving up his life.

That anger and betrayal popped and sizzled while he pulled out another soda. The door opened before he took his first sip, and Kate stepped back into the room, followed by a smiling Shannon, carrying a large plastic bowl.

Shannon crawled onto the L-shaped leather sectional near Simone and tugged on her mom’s hand, forcing her to scoot toward her. “Mrs. Harrison found popcorn and said we could watch a movie. Can we, Mom?”

Simone looked over her shoulder toward Kate. Kate closed the door and wrinkled her nose. “Thought the movie might help her drift back to sleep.”

“And the popcorn?” Simone asked.

Kate frowned. “Considering you look like you haven’t eaten in days, I figured some kind of food—even popcorn—wasn’t a bad midnight snack.”

Mitch paused midswallow and looked over the soda can at his lips toward Simone. Kate was right, and he’d been so pissed these last few days—last few hours—he hadn’t noticed just how pale and hollow her cheeks looked.

Guilt crept in. A guilt that warred with the anger he wanted to continue stoking.

She’d lied to him, broken his heart, and blown apart his house.

But she’d also been protecting her daughter for years. She’d given up her life, uprooted herself from her friends and family, moved clear across the country and started over. And she was right… She had tried to keep their relationship platonic. But he’d pushed until he’d fallen head over heels in love with the woman and was already planning a marriage she didn’t want.

Her words from earlier sifted through his mind. Words he thought he’d dreamed but now wasn’t so sure.

“I’m so sorry. I shouldn’t have lied to you. I didn’t mean it.”

Confusion slid back in, replacing the anger and melding with a knot of unease that formed a hot ball of nerves in the middle of his belly. Just which lie was she sorry for? Not telling him about her past? Hiding the fact she’d been in the witness protection program and that people could be trying to kill her? Or what she felt for him?”

Those nerves twisted and rolled until his skin grew tight and tingly.

“Mitch?”

Startled, he looked toward his sister, standing on the other side of the room, watching him with a perplexed expression. Her curly chestnut hair, a lot like his but longer, was tied in a neat tail at the back of her head and swayed when she moved. “Are you okay?”

He glanced around the room in a daze. Simone and Shannon were snuggled on the couch with their popcorn, watching some animated movie on the TV, the lights dimmed and the sound on low. Simone had her back turned his way and didn’t seem the least bit curious about what he was doing. His gaze flicked the other direction, to Ryan’s desk, where Ryan was leaning back against the mahogany surface and Kate was standing in front of him with her arms crossed over her chest, listening to whatever he’d been telling her.

They both stared at him as if his head might twist off and explode.

Good God. How long had he been standing there? Mitch rubbed a hand down his face and set the soda can back on the bar with a hand that was way more unsteady than he liked. “I’m fine.”

The look Kate sent him said she didn’t think he looked fine. She obviously thought he looked fucked. Which was exactly how he felt. “Why don’t you go take a shower and get cleaned up while Ryan fills me in on everything? By then, maybe Shannon will be asleep, and we can all decide what to do next.”

What to do next. Yeah. Like that was a simple decision.

Mitch nodded, barely registering his feet moving as he crossed the office toward Ryan’s fancy corporate bathroom. He didn’t have a clue what to do next. But one thing was certain: he needed to clear his head and think.

Because if he didn’t stop being ruled by his emotions, he wasn’t sure where he’d end up. Or who would be leading him.

“Hey, Counselor. How are you holding up?”

Simone looked up when Kate sank into the chair to her right. Mitch called her that too sometimes—counselor—and she’d always liked it, but right now all it did was make her feel like a fraud.

She lifted Shannon’s head from her lap to the couch and shifted closer to the short arm of the sectional so she and Kate could talk quietly. “I’m fine.”

“It’s okay not to be fine, you know, considering all this.”

“No. I’m fine. Really.”

Kate’s small smile said she didn’t believe her. “I wish you’d told me some of what was going on. I don’t know what I could have done to help, but I do know what it’s like not to have anyone to talk to. I would have been there for you.”

Simone didn’t want to think about how isolating her life had been because of all this. After she’d left New England, she’d accepted the fact she’d never have any close girlfriends again. Over the years, she’d made acquaintances, but she’d never let herself get attached to anyone. Not until recently.

She blinked back the tears threatening and leaned on the armrest of the sofa. “I’m sorry. I should have told you. It’s just…not something you can blurt out, you know?”

“I know.” Kate’s hand covered hers on the armrest. “And I’m not upset that you didn’t tell me. I understand.”

Simone frowned. “I wish others were as understanding.”

“Mitch is just…shell-shocked right now.”

Yeah, Simone knew all about ‘shell-shocked.’ But it was more than that. She’d seen the look in his eyes when his house—and life—had been destroyed, all because of her.

“He has every right to be upset with me.”

“That doesn’t mean it’s okay for him to be a jerk,” Kate countered.

Simone huffed a sound that was part laugh, part exasperation. “Maybe. But it doesn’t change the truth.”

“Just give him some time. He’ll get over it.”

Simone wasn’t so sure. And right now, she didn’t even know if she wanted him to get over it. She’d seen a side of him tonight she hadn’t known existed. And when she thought back to that earring stabbing into her back…

Her stomach rolled, and a sick feeling slid up her throat.

She closed her eyes tight, then opened them again, fighting back the nausea. “I can’t think about Mitch right now. I have too many other things to worry about. Shannon and I have to leave.”

“Simone—”

“No, don’t.” Simone held up a hand to stop her friend from protesting. This was going to hurt no matter how she did it, but it was better just to get it over with. “I’ve thought a lot about it while you and Ryan have been over there whispering. I voluntarily left the witness protection program. My case, according to WITSEC, was closed. But even if they would take me back, I’m not sure I’d want to go. Whether Will leaked my information or not doesn’t really matter. It’s out there. And with everything that happened, I obviously can’t stay here. I’d go now, except”—her gaze strayed to her daughter’s angelic face—“Shannon’s been through so much tonight, I wanted to give her one good night’s sleep before we leave.”

Kate was quiet for a moment, then finally said, “Where will you go?”

Options raced through Simone’s frazzled mind. Options she’d considered over the last few days, then abandoned. “I’m not sure. Somewhere far from here. That’s all I know.”

“Don’t jump without thinking, Simone.”

Simone looked to her friend. “I’m not. But if it was Reed’s and Julia’s safety on the line—”

Kate sighed. “I’d do the exact same thing.”

Simone knew her friend would.

Kate squeezed her hand and pushed to her feet, then reached for a blanket Simone hadn’t noticed on the coffee table. “I brought this for you and Shannon. If you’re really leaving in the morning, you need your rest too.”

Simone took the blanket and looked up at her friend. “You’re not going to try to stop me?”

“No.” She glanced across the room to where Ryan was busily searching his computer monitor. “But that man of mine is trying to come up with some other options for you. If he finds something, will you at least listen?”

Simone frowned. “I don’t know what he could possibly find that would change my mind.”

“Let’s just see what he discovers. He has been known to surprise us, now and again.”

Ryan Harrison, CEO of the universe, come up with something game changing? It could happen, but Simone doubted it. This situation wasn’t something his money or fame or billion-dollar pharmaceutical company could fix.

She forced a sad smile she didn’t feel and looked back at her friend. “Sure. But I’m not getting my hopes up. They’ve been crushed to rubble before.”

“Have a little faith, Simone. Sometimes, it’s all you really need.”

Simone flicked off the TV, spread the blanket over her daughter, and lay down on the other arm of the sofa, so their heads were touching on the pillow they shared. She used to have faith, but even that had failed her. She’d lost her identity, lost her husband, and now she was losing not just the family she’d come to love here in San Francisco, but she’d lost Mitch. The only other person besides Shannon she would risk all of this for.

In her case, even faith seemed miles out of her grasp.