Kiss and Die

Chapter 113

Roses are red. Rubies are too. My heart was broken. Now yours is too.

Shrimp heard how far the echo of the woman’s voice went to the wall and then stopped. He realized it was a voice he knew. ‘Nina?’

‘You betrayed me, Shrimp. I gave you my heart and you betrayed me.’

‘Nina…please, where am I? What’s happened? Put a light on; let me see you.’

‘You were going to be different. I gave you the chance to be the one. I saw you at that bar. I saw you playing with your wedding ring. You didn’t notice me. I was tucked behind you, out of sight. I had a long caramel-coloured wig. For a second I thought you had recognized me but you didn’t. That evening I watched you taking girls to your room, one after the other. You make me sick. You’re no better than all the rest. I thought you were the love of my life. But you lied, cheated on me. You are just like he was…how could you, Shrimp? I loved you.’

‘I was working undercover. If you saw me pick up girls it was because I’ve been working on a case, that’s all. I never touched them, Nina, I wouldn’t, I promise. Please, Nina, let me go. I love you.’

‘You’re just like him. He used to come to Hong Kong once a month. He came for five days. He came to eat in our restaurant every night. He made me feel special. He took me out and he bought me things, clothes, shoes. We had to sneak in and out of here. He bought me wigs to wear, so no one would know it was me. He took me to bed. He promised we’d elope. He promised to take me away. I didn’t know I was pregnant until it was too late. Then he told me he was married. He never came back for me. He left me to face it alone.

‘The girls started to make fun of me in school. I couldn’t hide it any more. I didn’t know what to do. I was so frightened. The girls shouted names at me. The girls just like Rajini, just like that officer, Tammy. Just like her. They thought they were better than me then. I couldn’t hide it any more. I had to tell my parents. They were so ashamed. I was six and a half months pregnant when my grandmother held me down and my mother gave me an abortion with a skewer, on this bed. The same skewer we use on the tandoori. The same one I use to pierce a man’s heart. I was not allowed to see the baby, a baby girl. They threw her in the rubbish. I found her in there. Someone had thrown some old flowers in on top of her. She was covered in rose petals. I dried her body on the roof where its spirit could be free. I called her Rose.

‘I killed my mother in the kitchen. I held her head in the deep fryer. I have killed my grandmother. She deserved to die for her part and she has no one to look after her now. She hasn’t got me any more.

‘“Nina do this. Nina do that. Nina fetch the lobsters to marinate for the tandoori grill, speciality of the house.” I loved watching them eat those lobsters: crack open the claw and know that they were fed with human flesh, handpicked by me. All those men deserved to die.’ She stopped. She gave a sob in the darkness. ‘I think about him sometimes and wonder if he ever thinks about me.

‘He called me Ruby. “Hey Ruby,” he would joke. He talked like Michael Caine. “My Ruby Murray.”’