Kleinzeit

Presents

Night. Kleinzeit asleep, Sister awake. The ward groaning, choking, sighing, snoring, splatting in bedpans. Sister in her lamplit binnacle, steadfastly pointing to her magnetic north. The sea rushing by on either side, the white bow wave gleaming in the dark.

Well, said God. Big day for you tomorrow, eh? Schwanzheit getting out.

Kleinzeit, said Sister. I don’t think I want to talk about it, I don’t want to do anything unlucky.

Not to worry, said God. You’ll have luck. You’re lucky.

Do you mean that, said Sister. Am I really? It hasn’t always seemed that way to me.

Well of course it never does, said God. I don’t say you’re especially lucky. Just a good ordinary everyday sort of luck. That’s as much as I’ve got myself, and I don’t know anyone who’s got more. Universe, History, Eternity, anybody you talk to these days, we’re all in the same boat.

I wouldn’t know, said Sister. I don’t ever talk to them. I don’t think very big.

And you’re quite right not to, said God. Just carry on as you are, and all the best to both of you. I really mean that.

Thank you, said Sister.

You’re moving into his flat? said God.

I expect so, said Sister.

What’s he got there, gas or electricity?

It’s all electric.

I’ll see if I can put off the electrical strike for a week or so, said God. Give you a chance to start off with cooker, fridge and heating all in working order. Sort of a wedding present.

That’s really very kind of you, said Sister. I appreciate that.

Well, said God, I’m off then. We’ll stay in touch.

Oh yes, said Sister. Thanks so much.

Not a bad sort, God, said Hospital. In His own fumbling way.

He’s a lot nicer than you are, said Sister.

I’m not so bad, said Hospital. I talk rough, maybe, but I’m a decent chap.

Hmmph, said Sister.

What I said about Kleinzeit not getting to keep you, said Hospital, Eurydice and all that, I didn’t mean it the way you thought. I just meant ultimately, you know, in the long run. He can have you for as long as he lasts.

Or as long as I last, said Sister. Or as long as it lasts. I’m not looking ahead.

However you like to put it, said Hospital, I shan’t interfere. I just wait about while things take their course. I’d like to give you a little present too.

That is nice of you, said Sister. I wasn’t expecting anything like that.

It’s nothing much, said Hospital. The odds were on Kleinzeit to come down with the flu next week but I steered it in another direction. I think it’s heading for Dr Bashan. Of course Kleinzeit’ll probably get it the week after. I can’t really change anything.

But an extra week without it is lovely, said Sister. Thanks so much.

Ahem, said Word. We haven’t met.

No, said Sister. I don’t recognize your voice.

No matter, said Word. I’ve a present for you too.

It’s lovely, getting all these presents, said Sister.

Wherever there’s a barrow full of rocks, said Word, you’ll be there too.

Is that a present? said Sister.

Yes indeed, said Word.

Thank you, said Sister. You’ve all been so kind.