Pop Goes the Weasel

65

The house was quiet when Charlie returned home. Steve had eaten and gone to bed – the kitchen was scrupulously clean as it always was when he was in charge. Charlie picked at a few leftovers, then headed upstairs to shower. The hot water pummelled her, briefly reviving her, but she was utterly spent and hurried to bed.

Steve didn’t stir as she entered, so she crept into bed as quietly as she could. They weren’t sleeping in separate beds, which was one small mercy, but communication between them was almost non-existent. Ever since she’d decided to answer Helen’s plea to return to the investigation, Steve had made little attempt to hide his anger and disappointment. It was unbearably sad that just as Charlie was finally finding her feet at work, her domestic life was falling apart. Why couldn’t things just work out for once? What did she have to do to be happy?

She lay awake staring at the ceiling. Steve stirred as he often did and Charlie flicked a glance at him. She was surprised – and unnerved – to find him staring at her.

‘Sorry, love, I didn’t mean to wake you,’ she said softly.

‘I wasn’t asleep.’

‘Oh.’ Charlie couldn’t read him in the half-light. He didn’t seem angry, but he didn’t seem friendly either.

‘I’ve been lying awake thinking.’

‘Right. What about?’

‘About us.’

Charlie said nothing in response, unsure where this was going.

‘I want us to be happy, Charlie.’

Tears suddenly filled Charlie’s eyes. They were tears of happiness and tears of relief.

‘So do I.’

‘I want to forget all the stuff that’s happened and be like we were before. To live the life we always wanted to lead.’

‘Me too,’ Charlie said, just about managing to get the words out. She clung to Steve now and he to her.

‘And I want us to try for a baby.’

Charlie’s sobbing subsided slightly, but she said nothing.

‘We always wanted kids. We can’t be ruled by bad things that happened before, we have a life to lead. I want to have a baby with you, Charlie. I want us to start trying again.’

Charlie buried her head in Steve’s chest. The truth was that she desperately wanted a baby too, desperately wanted them to be a happy normal family. But she was also aware that this wasn’t compatible with her career and that Steve had just thrown down the gauntlet.

He would never put it so crudely, but Steve had just told Charlie that it was time to choose.