The Crossover

Final Jeopardy

The only sounds,

teeth munching melon and strawberry

from Mom’s fruit cocktail dessert

and Alex Trebek’s annoying voice:

This fourteen-time NBA all-star

also played minor-league baseball

for the Birmingham Barons.

Even Mom knows the answer.

Hey, Dad, the playoffs start in two days

and the team needs me, I say.

Plus my grades were good.

JB rolls his eyes and says to Alex

what we all know: Who is “Michael Jeffrey Jordan”?

Josh, this isn’t about your grades, Mom says.

How you behave going forward is what matters to us.

I loooove Christmas.

Can’t wait for your mother’s

maple turkey, Dad says, trying

to break the tension. Nobody responds,

so he continues:

Y’all know what the mama turkey

said to her naughty son?

If your papa could see you now,

he’d turn over in his gravy!

None of us laughs.

Then all of us laugh.

Chuck, you are a silly man, Mom says.

Jordan, we want to meet your new friend, she adds.

Yeah, invite her to dinner, Dad agrees.

Filthy and I

want to get to know the girl who stole JB.

Stop that, Chuck! Mom says, hitting Dad on the arm.

What is “I’ll think about it”? JB replies,

kissing Mom, dapping Dad, and not once

looking

at

me.