The People’s Republic of Desire

64 Country Mother and City Daughter

Lulu's mother comes to visit her a week before the Chinese New Year. She plans to stay with Lulu for a month and insists that they sleep in the same bed.

For a single, independent, big-city girl, it might sound like a nightmare to share a bed with her unworldly country-bumpkin mother for a month. But it turns out to be not as unpleasant as Lulu had expected. It is actually fun… for a while.

Lulu's mother is an excellent cook and a clean and tidy woman. Whenever Lulu comes back home, the dinner is cooked and ready to be served, and everything from her keys to her gloves has been organized and put in good order. Moreover, having someone waiting for you at home makes Lulu feel so warm. It is this sense of family that she hasn't had for so long. There is only one moment that turns out to be a bit embarrassing. One evening, Lulu and her mother are watching the Discovery Channel. That day's program showcases a primitive tribe on the Amazon, and some of the tribal members have no clothes. "Nudity! It's so awful!" Lulu's mother screams and hastily switches the channel. Lulu thinks her mother is making a fuss. Other than that incident, the first week Lulu and her mother spend together is nearly idyllic.

But mothers have their own set of priorities. And before too long, things start to change. Lulu's mother, like most Chinese mothers, is curious about her daughter's private life. She peppers Lulu with questions about her relationships with men. Other generational, social, and cultural differences begin to appear.

One day, Lulu comes home, takes a shower, and starts to get dressed to meet Beibei and me. She suddenly discovers that all of her sexy underwear is missing. Lulu is partial to thongs, brief panties, and lace bras that reveal as well as support. She is dismayed. "Mom, did you do the laundry? Where did you put my underwear? I can't find a single clean set."

Her mother tells her that she thought they were not only not functional but also way too small. "I threw them away and bought you new big, roomy underwear. Why should you squeeze yourself into such tiny bits of fabric that don't even cover anything?"

From there it only gets worse. Another day when Lulu comes back from work, her mother is waiting for her at the kitchen table. She is holding a package of condoms in her hand.

"Lulu, what is this?"

Lulu's mind begins to reel. She is embarrassed; discussing sex with one's parents is never easy. It is just not done in Chinese culture. So she tells her mother they are balloons. "Black balloons? Black is not a lucky color. Why do you have black balloons?" her mother keeps the questions coming.

Lulu cannot tell her mother that this is for girls who have fantasies of black men like her, so she has to make up an answer on the spot. "Mom, that is the most fashionable color. Don't you see that so many young women always love to wear black clothes?"

Her mother murmurs, "I also wonder why they smell like cherry."

Lulu cannot tell her mother that it actually tastes like cherry too. She dodges the question by saying, "Let's go get some red balloons for New Year's Day."

But the worst is yet to come. One day Lulu comes home. Nothing happens during dinner. They watch some TV, then they decide to go to sleep. Once they are in bed, her mother says bluntly and without warning, "Adult movies are not proper for unmarried girls like you."

This is a totally unexpected statement. "What do you mean?" But Lulu can already guess the rest.

Her mother scolds her, "I was putting away the laundry, and I opened the bottom drawer of your bureau. I found a collection of adult movies. Why do you have them? It's not right for you to watch movies like these. Only bad girls do that. You aren't married yet and you have to care about your reputation."

Lulu tells her mother that this is Beijing, not the small town she came from. People can watch anything they like, and it is not considered evil for a single woman to enjoy the privileges of married women. Lulu considers giving her mother some more detailed examples from her own love life but quickly decides against it.

Her mother shuts down and becomes quiet. Both of them toss and turn in the bed. A few hours later, Lulu, who is already half-asleep, receives a nudge from her mother. "Lulu, are you still awake?"

"What?" Lulu asks her mother in the darkness.

Her mother finally reveals the puzzle in her mind. "Lulu, I watched one of those videos. Do foreigners really do that in bed? That is so dirty!"