Whirlwind Wedding

Chapter 19

Elizabeth snipped fragrant lilac blooms from a leafy bush along the perimeter of the formal garden at Wesley Manor, the country estate just outside London that had been her home for the past three weeks. She tried to concentrate on the task at hand so as not to cut her fingers, but it was nearly impossible.

Three weeks had passed since her confrontation with Austin.

Three weeks since he'd sent her here, sent her away from him with nothing more than a terse note: You will send a message immediately should you see something or when you know if yo 're with child.

But after three weeks she hadn't had a single vision… hadn't felt anything but heartache. And she still didn't know if she was with child. Every night she lay in her lonely bed, filled with anxiety, her hands resting on her stomach, trying to sense if a child grew within her, but all she saw was darkness. Unrelenting darkness.

These had been the longest, loneliest three weeks of her life.

Yet the alternative, living in the same house as Austin, facing him every day, trying to hide her misery and live the lie she'd created would have proven impossible. She was much better off here.

Even so, the anguish that was her constant companion showed no signs of abating. She tried to keep herself busy, to keep her thoughts occupied so as not to torture herself wondering what he was doing. Or whom he was doing it with.

But no matter how many flowers she picked how much lilac water she distilled how many hours she spent reading or roaming the grounds, nothing eased the ache in her heart. She tried to console herself with the knowledge that her actions had spared Austin the torment of losing a child and the emptiness of a cold marriage bed but nothing could erase the agony that clawed at her every time she pictured his face.

A memory of him filled her mind and turned her blood cold. Him staring at her, as he had in those final moments, with loathing in his eyes.

Hot tears spilled from her eyes and she impatiently wiped at them with her gloved fingers. She'd promised herself that she wouldn't cry today. How long would it take before she could make it through an entire day without crying? She almost laughed. Dear God how long before she could make it through an entire hour without crying?

"There you are," came Robert's jolly voice from behind her. "Caroline and I had nearly given you up for lost."

Dismay filled her and she quickly swiped at her eyes. Adopting what she hoped was a cheerful expression, she turned and smiled at her approaching brother-in-law.

Robert saw her face and his footsteps nearly faltered. By damn, she'd been crying again. In spite of her smile, there was no hiding the red-rimmed eyes that spoke so eloquently of sleepless nights and profound sadness.

A spurt of anger shot through him. What the devil was wrong with his brother? Couldn't Austin see how miserable she was? No, of course he couldn't-he was in London. Three weeks ago, Austin had asked him to accompany Elizabeth, Caroline, and their mother to Wesley Manor, explaining that he didn't want them to return to Bradford Hall until the case of the Runner's death was solved.

But Robert knew something was seriously wrong between his brother and Elizabeth. He'd visited Austin yesterday, and based on their time together, Robert knew his brother was just as miserable as Elizabeth, if not more so. He'd never seen Austin in such a holy foul mood.

As for Elizabeth, he'd simply never encountered such a dispirited brokenhearted individual as his sister-in-law. She reminded him of a lovely flower that someone had forgotten to water, so it simply wilted and withered away. Well, he'd had enough of it. Whatever was keeping Austin and Elizabeth apart was about to end.

Pretending he didn't see the tears still shimmering in her eyes, he made her an exaggerated formal bow. "How lovely you look, Elizabeth." Without giving her a chance to reply, he slipped her hand through his elbow and propelled her down the path. "We must hurry, the coach is leaving in"-he quickly calculated how much time Caroline and his mother would need to pack their things-"two hours." He knew both women would be frantic when he told them, but desperate times called for drastic measures. "We don't want to hold up the party."

"Coach? Party? What are you talking about?"

"Why, our excursion to London. Did Caroline not tell you?"

He glanced at her and saw she'd visibly paled. "No. I… I do not wish to go to London."

"Pshaw. Of course you do. Too many solitary days spent in the country is stifling. We'll attend the theater, go to the shops, visit the museums-"

"Robert." She halted, then pulled her hand from his arm.

"Yes?"

"Although I appreciate the invitation, I'm afraid I cannot join you. I hope you enjoy yourself."

He wondered if she had any idea how heartbreaking her palpable sadness was. And he guessed why she didn't want to go. His idiot of a brother.

Heaving a sigh, he shook his head. "A pity you won't join us. That big, empty town house certainly won't seem the same without you."

She frowned. "Empty?"

"Well, yes, what with Austin visiting his Surrey estate for the, er, annual inspection of the crops. Surely he told you." Annual inspection of the crops? He nearly rolled his eyes heavenward at his outrageous fabrication.

"I'm afraid he didn't mention it to me."

Shaking his head he uttered a disgusted sound. "How like my big brother. Always forgetting these things."

"How long will he be in Surrey?"

"Oh, at least a fortnight," Robert lied with a perfectly straight face. "We'll have a wonderful time. Besides, Caroline will fly into the boughs if you refuse to join us. She desperately needs you as a shopping companion as Mother's tastes are far too staid. And you'll be saving me the dreary prospect of having no one to converse with except my mother and sister? He screwed his face into a horrified expression. "So you see? You simply must come."

He could almost see her mind working, and relief swept through him when she offered what appeared to be a genuine smile… a small smile, but genuine nonetheless. "All right. Perhaps a trip to London would be a nice change. Thank you, Robert." "My pleasure."

"I suppose I'd best be off to pack." "An excellent idea. You go on ahead. I'll be along shortly."

He watched her retreating back, waiting until she disappeared into the maze. When he was sure she couldn't see him, he vaulted over a hedge in an un-lordlike manner that would have sent his mother into a swoon, and dashed pell-mell toward the side entrance of the manor.

He had to inform Caroline and his mother of their imminent trip to London.

Was she pregnant?

Austin sat in his study, staring into the fire, nursing his fourth brandy, trying without success to banish the question that had haunted him for three weeks. Miles stood by the mantel, relating something regarding the latest on dit he'd heard at White's, but Austin had no idea what his friend was saying. After another several brandies, he would no doubt cease to hear Miles altogether. Perhaps he would cease to feel as well.

He'd spent the last three weeks tracking down two soldiers who had served with William, but as they had a year ago, both men stated that they saw him, like so many others that day, go down in battle. He'd also waited in vain, to receive further instructions from the blackmailer, but none came. Why hadn't he sought to collect the five thousand pounds he'd demanded? If Elizabeth were here, perhaps she could-

He sliced off the thought, but it was too late. She was embedded in his mind and no matter how he tried to banish it, the question reverberated through him-was she pregnant? He both longed for and dreaded the answer. If she was, they'd have a child… a child destined to die before she'd really had a chance to live. If she wasn't pregnant, his marriage was over. A bitter laugh rose in his throat like bile. Hell, either way, his marriage was over.

Tossing back the contents in his snifter, he rose and walked to the crystal decanters by the windows overlooking the street. He poured himself a double, then pushed the curtain aside.

The expansive lawns of Hyde Park lay just across the street, and a line of fine carriages promenaded through the lanes. Fashionably dressed lords and ladies strolled in the late afternoon sunshine, their faces wreathed in what appeared to be happy smiles.

Happy smiles. An image of Elizabeth, laughing and smiling, rose before his eyes, and he swallowed half his drink in one gulp. Bloody hell, how long would it take before she didn't occupy every corner of his mind? Before his anger, and damn it, his hurt, would abate? Before he could draw a breath without his chest aching with loss? Before he would stop hating her for tearing his heart out, and hating himself for letting her? Damn it, how long before he stopped loving her?

He didn't know, but by God another brandy would hopefully speed the process along. He raised his snifter to drain the contents down his throat, but paused as a shiny black carriage pulled by four exquisite matched bays rolled into view. By damn, that looks like one of my coaches. Leaning closer to the window, he saw the distinctive Bradford crest emblazoned on the ebony lacquered door.

Bloody hell! It was no doubt Robert, come back to plague him. He'd suffered through his brother's company only yesterday and he had no desire for a repeat visit.

"What has captured your attention?" Miles asked joining him at the decanters. Miles craned his neck. "Isn't that one of your coaches?"

"Yes, I'm afraid so. Apparently my brother has decided to return for but yet another unannounced visit."

The coach halted in front of the town house and a footman opened the door. Austin's mother alighted.

"What is she doing here?" Austin asked. No doubt another shopping excursion. He suddenly stilled his stomach clenching into a hard knot.

Could his mother or Robert have a message from Elizabeth? The disturbing thought had no sooner crossed his mind than Elizabeth alighted from the coach. His fingers tightened around his snifter and the elaborately cut glass dug into his skin.

"Bloody hell, what is she doing here?" But even as Austin growled the words, his mind whirled. Did she know if she carried his child? Only three weeks had passed. If she knew this quickly, she most likely wasn't pregnant-or was she? Or maybe she'd come because she'd had another vision of William? He looked out the window and fought the urge to press his nose to the glass like a boy at a sweet shop, eager for a glimpse of her.

She was dressed in a peacock blue traveling suit, with a matching bonnet. Loose auburn tendrils framed her face and he immediately recalled the feel of her soft hair sifting through his fingers. Even at a distance he could see the circles shadowing her eyes, a telltale sign of sleepless nights.

The footman reached a hand into the coach and helped Caroline alight.

Miles drew a sharp breath. "What the hell is she doing here?" he asked elbowing past Austin to get a better view.

Austin contemplated his friend with surprise. "She's my sister. Why the hell shouldn't she be here? Besides, you know my family. They travel in packs. Like bloody wolves. I'd wager any sum that my brother is about to make an appearance."

As if on cue, Robert emerged from the coach, a huge grin lighting his face. Damn it! What was Robert up to now? And why had Elizabeth come here instead of sending a message? Turning away from the window, Austin slammed his snifter onto his desk and stalked toward the door.

"Austin! How wonderful to see you!"

Her mother-in-law's words jerked Elizabeth's head around. Striding down the corridor toward the foyer, anger evident in every taut line of his body, was her husband.

Dismay washed over her. Good heavens, what was he doing here? Why wasn't he in Surrey?

She stood frozen in place, her eyes riveted on him, and tried to hold back the swell of love and longing that hit her, but it was a hopeless task. Dear God she'd missed him so much!

But it was clear from his expression that he had not missed her. In fact, as he strode into the foyer, he completely ignored her.

He bent down and accepted a kiss from his mother. "This is unexpected" he said in a tight voice. "I trust all is well?"

"Oh, yes," the dowager said with a smile. "Caroline, Elizabeth, and I had a hankering for the shops. Robert kindly offered to escort us to Town."

Austin turned a narrow-eyed glare on his brother. "How dutiful of you, Robert."

Robert's smile could have lit the entire room. "No trouble at all. Always happy to accompany a coach filled with lovely ladies."

Austin cocked a brow at Caroline. "Didn't you shop enough when you were here several weeks ago?"

A gay laugh trilled from Caroline. "Oh, Austin, how amusing you are! You should know that a woman can never spend enough time in the shops."

Elizabeth stood in an agony of embarrassment. Her husband had yet to so much as acknowledge her presence. An awkward silence ensued. Heat crept up her neck and she wished she could simply sink through the floor. Just when she thought he meant to walk away without greeting her, he turned and stared directly at her.

The icy fury shooting from his gray eyes chilled her to the bone. And although he stared directly at her, it seemed as if he were looking through her, as if she weren't really there.

Any hopes she may have secretly harbored that time would soften him toward her died with that single look. How on earth was she going to survive this visit? Not being with him, agonizing over what she'd lost, was a pain she could barely stand.

But seeing him look at her like this, with all the warmth and caring extinguished from his eyes, inflicted a piercing ache that weakened her knees.

But she'd done what she'd had to do. For him.

Determined not to let him see her inner torment, she forced herself to offer him a smile. "Hello, Austin."

A muscle ticked in his clenched jaw. "Elizabeth."

She tried to moisten her parched lips, but her mouth had gone dry. "I… I thought you were in Surrey."

His glacial expression could have frozen fire. "Surrey?"

"Yes. For the annual inspection of the crops…" Her voice trailed off into an agonizing embarrassed silence as he simply stared at her.

"Do you have something to tell me?" His clipped question hung in the air between them.

She felt the weight of everyone's eyes on them, watching their tense exchange. Humiliation washed over her, and if she'd thought her legs would cooperate, she would have run from the house. "No," she whispered. "Nothing."

She was saved from enduring further attempts at conversation when Miles joined them. He greeted everyone, but Elizabeth noticed that his bow to Caroline was stiff and that Caroline steadfastly looked at a place over his shoulder.

"I'd like a word with you in my study, Robert," Austin said in a voice that resembled a growl.

"Of course," Robert said. "The moment I'm settled in-"

"Now." Without another word Austin turned on his heel and strode down the corridor.

A deafening silence ensued. Finally, the dowager cleared her throat. "Well! Isn't that… nice? Robert, it appears Austin wishes to speak with you."

Robert's brows almost disappeared into his hairline. "Indeed? I hadn't particularly noticed." With a jaunty salute, he ambled down the corridor Austin had just stalked down.

The dowager turned back to the silent group with a smile that could only be described as desperate. "They're going to talk. Isn't that… nice? I'm sure this is going to be a wonderful visit."

"Wonderful," Caroline echoed looking everywhere but at Miles.

"Delightful," Miles agreed in a gloomy voice.

"Marvelous," Elizabeth said in a weak voice. She hoped she lived through it.

The instant Robert closed the study door, Austin bit out, "What the hell do you think you're doing?"

"Following your orders, brother dear. You said you wanted to speak to me now, so here I am. Speak away."

Austin forced himself to retain his casual posture: hips leaning against his desk, legs outstretched arms folded across his chest. If he didn't, he would be across the room in two strides, picking Robert up by his cravat.

"Why did you bring them here?"

Robert's face bore a mask of utter innocence. "Me? I didn't bring them here. You know how women love the shops. I-"

"Elizabeth hates the shops."

Robert's nonplussed stare clearly indicated that this was news to him. Austin studied his brother through narrowed eyes and tried to contain his anger. "Can you explain why Elizabeth thought I was in Surrey? And then perhaps you'd enlighten me regarding what the annual inspection of the crops entails."

"Surrey? Crops? I-"

"Enough, Robert. I'll ask you one more time. Why did you bring Elizabeth here? Don't lie to me."

Apparently the glacial fury in his tone served as a warning Robert decided not to ignore. Dropping all pretense of innocence, Robert said, "I brought her because it was painfully obvious to me when I saw you yesterday that you're miserable without her. And a blind man could see that she is equally miserable without you."

"If I'd wanted her here, I would have sent for her myself."

Temper flared in Robert's blue eyes. "Then I cannot fathom why you didn't do so, because it's clear you want her here, and even clearer that you need her here. You're just too stubborn to admit it. Whatever problems you're having, you cannot solve them if you're apart."

"Indeed?" Austin said in a deadly calm tone. "And when did you become an expert in marital relations- mine specifically?"

"I'm not. But I know you. I saw how you were with her. I saw how you looked at her. Whether you want to admit it or not, I know you care about her. Hell, let's just say it. You love her. And you're ill-tempered, unhappy, and damn near impossible to be around without her."

Pain and anger scissored through Austin, but he forced his features to remain blank. "You've clearly mistaken my feelings and mood Robert. I am not unhappy, I am busy. I'm responsible for six estates and there is a great deal of work that requires my attention."

Robert made a disgusted sound. "Then you clearly don't know the difference between busy and unhappy."

Austin turned a frosty glare on his brother. "I know the difference." Believe me, I know. "I will not tolerate this interference in my marriage. Is that clear?"

"Perfectly." He went on as if Austin hadn't spoken. "What has Elizabeth done to anger you so? Surely, whatever it is, you can forgive her for it. I cannot believe she would intentionally hurt you."

She intentionally ripped out my heart and showed herself for a calculating schemer. Pushing himself away from his desk, Austin said in a deceptively mild tone, "I think it would be best, and certainly much smarter, if you ceased expressing opinions on subjects you know nothing about."

"Elizabeth is wretchedly unhappy."

His insides involuntarily pinched but he ruthlessly pushed his sympathy aside. "I cannot imagine why. She is, after all, a duchess. She lacks for nothing."

"Except for a relationship with her husband."

"You forget that our marriage was one of convenience."

"Perhaps it started out that way, but you fell in love with her. And she with you."

If only that were true. "Enough. Stop worrying about Elizabeth and me and turn your energies toward more productive endeavors. Why don't you find yourself a mistress? Concentrate on your own life instead of plaguing mine."

Robert's brows raised. "Is that what you've done? Found yourself a mistress?"

Austin barely managed to swallow the bitter laugh pushing at the back of his throat. He couldn't imagine touching another woman. Before he could issue a retort, Robert continued "Because if you have, then you're a bigger fool than I thought. Why you would want another woman when you could have Elizabeth is beyond me."

"Has it not occurred to you that perhaps Elizabeth does not want my attentions?" He forced the question past his lips.

A bark of incredulous laughter escaped Robert. "Is that what this is about? You think Elizabeth doesn't want you? Good God Austin, you're either an idiot or you've gone daft. The woman adores you. A blind man could see that."

"You're wrong."

Robert's eyes turned troubled. "You're throwing away happiness with both hands, Austin. I hate to see you do that."

"Your concern has been duly noted. Now, this discussion is over." When it appeared Robert was about to argue, Austin added "Permanently over. Is that understood?"

Robert huffed out a clearly frustrated breath. "Yes."

"Good. I cannot ask you to leave now, but I shall expect you and this houseful of company you brought here to depart by tomorrow afternoon. And until then, you will keep them occupied and out of my way."

Without another word Austin quit the room, resisting an almost violent urge to slam the door.

She was here. In his house.

He didn't want her here. He didn't want to see her.

God help him, how was he going to manage to stay away from her for the next twenty-four hours?