A Common Pornography: A Memoir

About the Author

My So-Called Real Bands

ALTHOUGH MY DREAM of being a famous DJ or pop star never came true, at least I did get to enjoy some time in a few “real bands.” Here’s the short list.

Drill: Drill consisted of two or three friends who would make noise behind me when I started to do spoken-word performances in Spokane in 1990.

The Girl Scout Cookies: My friend Vince from Drill decided we should try some rehearsed songs instead of just doing improv behind my poems and rants. We stole drum beats from hip hop instrumentals that Vince played guitar riffs over. We played two shows in Spokane before I moved to Arkansas in 1991.

Love Jerk: In Fort Smith, Arkansas, I became friends with two rocker kids from the local high school, and we formed a three-piece rock band. This was happening at the same time that Nirvana was hitting it big, and I was able to turn these guys on to other bands like Beat Happening and Teenage Fan Club. Phillip slashed around on his guitar, Jason pounded his drums hard (he was still into Metallica), and I tried to sing. We had one song that was an ode to Florence Henderson. We played two shows before I moved away.

Moon Boots: I reunited with Vince a couple of years later in Portland, and we decided to do a two-man band.

I played a minimalist drum kit like Moe Tucker, and he played electric guitar and sang. We played three really fun shows with actual bands that I liked, but Vince stopped smoking pot and decided that he wasn’t interested anymore.

God’s Favorite Pussy: This was more of a cabaret act. Five hot Portland females lip-synching to classic hits while in full costume (wigs, roller skates, Viking outfits, etc.). I was a “go-go dancer” for them. On the night that GFP opened for Deee-Lite in Portland, I stayed home tending to the early birth of my son.

“We played three really fun shows with actual bands that I liked, but Vince stopped smoking pot and decided that he wasn’t interested anymore.”