A Song for Us

Chapter Twenty-Three

ERIC

DONNA HAD SOMEHOW succeeded in keeping my mind off Sarah for the most part. Usually the only activity that could keep my mind off the heavy stuff was performing with the band. I missed the stage and couldn’t wait to get up there again. The loud music drowned out my thoughts, and the longer we stayed off tour, the deeper I slipped back into my old self, unable to pull my thoughts from my past.

“Oh my God! Are you Tucker White?” I heard a female call from the next path over. I grabbed Donna’s hand and pulled her around the corner, my throat suddenly closing as I watched Derek kiss Sarah.

Cass’s eyes found mine and regret washed over her face as Tucker signed a piece of paper for the teenage girl in front of him.

“Hey,” Donna called out, and everyone turned to us. Donna held my hand tightly and stepped toward them, forcing me to go along.

“What the hell are you guys doing here?” I asked, trying not to sound irritated.

Chris pointed to Terry, who held up his hands in mock surrender and shook his head. I could only nod and run my free hand through my hair angrily.

My whole body ached as I forced myself not to go to Sarah and pull her away from Derek. I wanted to press my lips against hers so hard she forgot her own name. I could see her struggle to keep a smile on her face and it killed me inside.

“Where to?” Cass asked as she turned to Tucker.

He looked to me and I gave a quick nod, letting him know I was okay. “That way.” He pointed to a path off to the left that had a sign reading ELEPHANTS at the entrance. We all began to walk as I let Donna’s fingers slip from mine. It didn’t feel right holding on to her and wishing it were someone else.

A woman was standing on a crate just outside the elephant enclosure, and a crowd had gathered around her in a semicircle as she spouted off facts. We all gathered close and Sarah’s body was in front of mine. I stepped up beside her, Derek on her left and Donna on my right. A fucking love triangle.

I didn’t take in anything that the woman said as I relived the night before over and over in my head. I felt Sarah’s eyes on me and I suppressed a smile. Her eyes went forward and the back of her hand brushed against mine. I looped my pinkie in hers and tried my damnedest to focus ahead. I knew it was wrong and I would only end up hurting her, but I couldn’t resist. If she was smart, she would pull away, but she didn’t and I knew she was feeling the electricity that shot between us where our bodies connected. If anyone saw us, there would be no stopping the fight that would ensue, but I didn’t give a fuck. I couldn’t see anything but Sarah anymore.

I couldn’t get enough of her. Every touch, every glance, was a high that I never wanted to come down from. My fingers brushed along her hip as we watched the macaws flap their wings and spout random phrases. Her chest brushed against my back as we looked in at the Galápagos tortoises. Her eyes locked onto my lips as we stood in front of the giraffe enclosure, and I closed my eyes as I pictured her body straddling mine as her sweet breath blew over my mouth. I opened my eyes and her chest was rising and falling quickly as her tongue ran over her lower lip. She was thinking the same thing I was. I was dying to get her alone, even for a second, so I could touch her. When we stood in front of the lion exhibit, I finally saw my chance.

“You want to ride the train?” I asked Donna, glancing over her shoulder to Sarah.

“Yeah, sounds fun.” Donna smiled and I put my arm around her waist as we walked toward the small station. I leaned over the railing as we waited for the next ride, hating where my head was going. I didn’t want to share Sarah, I didn’t want to be her second choice, but my body wouldn’t let me say no to her. The heartbreak I was going to suffer from this would kill me, but I welcomed death if I got to spend even another minute alone with Sarah.

The train pulled under the small wooden roof and we all filed into our seats. I walked by Sarah and Derek, my eyes on the ground as I guided Donna into the row directly behind them.

We pulled out and Sarah’s hair blew back toward me, the smell of her fruity shampoo in the air. I stared out the side as we wound our way around the zoo and finally came up on the tunnel that ran behind the lion cages. My heart pounded in my chest as I watched the engine disappear into the blackness. As soon as our car was in the dark I leaned forward, sliding my hand along Sarah’s neck and turning her head so I could press my mouth against her cheek. Her quiet gasp was swallowed by the echoing of the train engine off the tunnel walls.

Even with everyone else around us, it felt as if we were in our own private world. My fingers slid down over her throat before I shoved myself back against my seat and we were thrust into daylight once again. I could still feel the rhythm of her heartbeat in my fingertips, like a beat to a song that was only ours.

There was no more fighting it. I wanted her more than I wanted my next breath, and I couldn’t stay away even if it slowly killed me inside. It was worth the pain to be able to be close to her.

I couldn’t wipe the smile off my face for the rest of our time at the zoo. When we finally left and decided to go out to get dinner, I was even making small talk with Derek, even though it turned my stomach to see him sitting next to her. I understood why he would want me to stay away. She was irresistible and he never deserved her. No one did.

I pressed my foot against hers as I sat across from her at the table, craving to be closer to her. Derek rambled on and on about my missing out at the strip club last night, and I couldn’t help but shake my head. Not only was he pissing off Sarah, but he couldn’t imagine how great a time I had without them. My feelings were tearing me in two—my heart went out to Sarah, but selfishly I relished every second that Derek was digging himself deeper into a hole.

I dipped a fry in mayonnaise and shoved it in my mouth as I absentmindedly began to hum the song we were making together last night. I tried not to be affected by her knowing smile but my heart stuttered.

“I like that,” Donna said as she stole one of my fries. “That a new song?”

I shook my head and took a drink of my soda. “Just something stuck in my head.” I glanced up as I grabbed another fry.

“Who is looking for a little fun tonight?” Terry asked as he rubbed his hands together. The women collectively groaned in disgust and I laughed. “That’s not what I meant.” He shook his head as we all waited for him to elaborate. “Beatfest is tonight and it is only about an hour from here. I have been looking forward to this all week.”

“This is going to be epic.” Tucker crumbled up his napkin and tossed it on his plate.

Cass shrugged as her eyes wandered around the table.

“I’m up for it,” I added as I finished my burger, and Sarah’s foot moved against mine.

“I’ll hook up transportation. Donna, you think we could get a limo on this short notice?” Tuck asked as the waitress came over and dropped off the check.

“It shouldn’t be that hard,” Donna spoke up.

“That’s what she said!” Cass laughed, and I tossed a fry at her and shook my head.