Heaven

DAY 278 MONDAY 22 APRIL 2002

As part of his rehabilitation into society, one of the lifers (Malcolm, armed robbery) has just started an outside job as a cleaner at Haven High School.

The first day turned out to be a bit of a culture shock when he discovered how mature and self-confident modern young women have become. He repeated a conversation he’d had this morning with a fourteen-year-old who approached him in the corridor.

‘Are you a convict?’

‘Yes, I am.’

‘What are you in for?’

‘Armed robbery.’

‘How many years have you served?’

‘Fourteen.’

‘Fourteen years without sex?’ the girl said in mock disbelief.

‘Yes,’ he repeated, to which the girl lifted up her skirt, and said, ‘Well you must be up for it.’

Malcolm ran out of the building. Had she reported him for even talking about sex, he probably would have been transferred back to a B-cat the same day.