ADRIEN’S FACE WENT ASHEN at Simin’s words. He headed directly to the Med Center where Jilia was already prepping beds. I followed.
He had told me I should go to my dorm room, but I stayed behind anyway. One look at Adrien’s tense face helped me fight the numbing Link enough for one clear thought of my own to shine through the fog: I didn’t want to leave him when he looked like that. At the same time, I didn’t dare un-Link myself. I couldn’t risk adding to the crisis by losing control of my power.
I pressed myself against the wall as Rez fighters came stumbling in with a loud chorus of shuffling boots, moans, and shouted instructions. Half a dozen wounded fighters were carried in and deposited onto the waiting beds. All of them bled from one place or another. The Link grayed color as much as emotion, but I could make out the dark stains on clothes and the floor, and the gashes on their skin. Adrien helped them all get situated. The cold readouts of the Link informed me of the size and breadth of each wound. One man’s leg looked like it had been blown completely off from the shin down. Another’s chest was half caved in, and Jilia laid her hands on him immediately. After a few moments though, her face fell and she cursed and moved on to another.
Adrien’s face reflected the horror I couldn’t feel.
In the chaos, a woman with sharp cheekbones and a hard mouth strode into the room. She wore the dark gray uniform of the Rez fighters. Her hands were stained with blood, but I couldn’t tell if it was hers. Professor Henry followed on her heels. “Are you sure you’re okay, Rosalina?” She must be the General.
“What happened?” Adrien asked.
The General ignored him and walked over to Jilia. “How are they?”
“I’m almost done triaging,” Jilia murmured, pressing on the abdomen of a woman Rez fighter. The woman winced but didn’t cry out. “We lost Tirpte. Jenald might need a bionic replacement.” Jilia lifted her hands and finally looked at the General. “But I think the others will make it.”
The General breathed out and closed her eyes. “We lost four more in the field. They were ready for us. There were only two cell commanders who knew we were coming.” She rubbed her forehead. “Chancellor Bright must have gotten to them.”
The Professor’s eyes widened. “Then all the cells in the northern quadrant might have been cracked.”
The General slammed her palm against a tray of instruments. “She knows our every move before we make it. And she’s being considered next in line to become Chancellor Supreme of Sector 6. If she manages it…” Her jaw tensed. “We can’t let it come to that.”
“Why were you in Central City?” Adrien asked. His voice was hard, almost accusatory.
The General’s eyes sliced over at him and something passed between them I couldn’t read. Her mouth tightened and a vein in her forehead stood out. “That’s none of your concern.” She glanced over at me. “No one should be in here except medical personnel. Leave now.”
Adrien pushed off from the wall and I followed him. He didn’t say anything once we got into the hallway, but he stopped and leaned over, putting his hands on his knees and breathing hard.
In the back of my mind, I felt a tugging thought that I should be doing something. But I didn’t know what.
“You should go to your dorm room,” he said, standing up and raking a hand hard through his hair. His facial features were contorted. The three long tones of Scheduled Subject Downtime sounded over the Link. Numbed by the soothing sounds, I moved my feet forward and shuffled obediently toward my dorm.
I paused and looked back before I turned the corner. Adrien was standing in the same place, his eyes wet as he looked down at the stains on his hands.
The next morning, Ginni told me to un-Link as per our usual morning routine, and immediately everything that had happened the night before rushed in again. The bloody soldiers. The General’s anger. And Adrien’s face when I left him.
“How are the soldiers who came in last night?” I asked Ginni, trusting that she’d have the latest news.
“One died, but the rest are going to be okay.”
I showered and dressed quickly, braiding my long dark hair while it was still wet. I hurried along to breakfast before Xona and Ginni were ready, hoping Adrien might be there. He’d been so obviously hurting last night, and I’d left him there. Just walked away. The Link had turned me into an unfeeling monster. I had to see him and try to make it right.
But other than the early-rising Rez fighters, the Caf was empty.
“He eats breakfast with his mom sometimes,” Ginni said as we dumped our trays half an hour later.
But Adrien wasn’t in our morning training session either. I came up to Ginni after class, wringing my hands anxiously. “Can you…?”
“Use my power?” she finished. She nodded and closed her eyes for a second, then opened them again. “He’s in the east bathroom.”
“Thanks.”
I hurried to the east bathroom and pushed the sliding door open gently. I heard the rush of running sink water and opened the door all the way.
Adrien was at the sink, splashing his face over and over. He’d half soaked his tunic, but he kept cupping water in his hands and throwing it onto his face, slapping his cheeks hard every time. He finally stopped, his hands braced on either side of the sink, a line of muscle forming on his cheek where he gritted his teeth. He stared at himself in the mirror.
His face looked pinched with pain. His shoulder blades jutted out next to the taut muscles on his back.
Seeing him like this shocked all the questions right out of me. I felt a hitch in my chest as I watched. I’d never seen him like this before. He was always so ready with a smile for me or a joke for Rand and Juan at the Caf table.
“How long?” he whispered, his voice low and guttural. At first I thought he was talking to me, but then I realized he was questioning his reflection.
“Adrien?” I asked, finally stepping inside.
He looked up and his mouth dropped open in surprise when he saw me in the mirror. He spun around, rubbing his forearm over his dripping face and pasting on a quick smile.
“Hey,” he said, then looked away and cleared his throat.
“What’s going on?” I stepped closer.
“Nothing.” He grabbed a few towels from the dispenser on the wall and started cleaning up the water he’d splashed all over the sink.
I came closer and put my hand on top of his to stop him from scrubbing the sink so hard. “What did you mean when you asked, ‘How long?’”
He flinched, but covered it quickly with a smile.
“I’m so sorry I left you like that last night,” I said. “Are you upset about the soldiers? Or did you have a new vision?”
He closed his eyes and breathed out in frustration. “I can’t tell you.”
“Why not?”
“Last time I told you about the future,” his words came out harsh, “it caused you so much stress you had a nightmare and lost control of your power.”
My mouth dropped open. “That wasn’t your fault!”
“Remember that story we read about Oedipus, and how the oracle started it all?” He turned to me, his voice heated. “I feel like it’s the same with me. Whenever I tell people my visions, bad things follow. Those soldiers last night…” The smiling mask had dropped away and every ounce of grief and pain was clear in his eyes. “I told Taylor about a vision I had, and that’s why they were in Central City in the first place. It’s because of me those soldiers died.”
“Adrien—”
“The things I’ve seen…” He shook his head. “I’ve tried so many times to change things, and every time I fail. I thought maybe I just didn’t have enough power to stop them, so I started sharing all my visions with the General. Even one vision I should have never told her.” His shoulders slumped in defeat. “Knowing the future changes a person. It makes you desperate, or reckless.”
He looked at the mirror again, his haunted eyes reflecting back. “Or hopeless. I’ve learned my lesson now. You can’t stop what’s coming for you. What’s the point of even trying?”
“Oh, Adrien,” I murmured, pulling him into my arms, ignoring his soaked tunic and holding him as tightly as I could. I listened to his heartbeat through the damp cloth. “Shhh, it’s okay,” I whispered. “It’s gonna be okay.” I patted his back.
I pulled his head down and kissed his forehead, wanting to comfort him any way I could. I kissed down to his ear, then to his cheek, tasting salt on my lips from his tears. I kept moving, slow gentle brushes of my mouth all the way down his face.
“It’s gonna be okay,” I whispered again. He stood still in my arms, not moving as I hovered, inches from his lips. He stared at me, his eyes dark. Then he cupped the back of my head and pulled me into him for one deep, hungry kiss. A sizzle of lightning sparked all through my body.
All the anguish and intensity that had been in his voice a moment ago was now transformed into his touch. I gasped as his tongue trailed down my neck and pulled his head back up roughly with my hands so I could kiss his full lips again.
He twirled me until his body pinned me against the wall. One of my legs hitched up around his hips, pulling him closer. He gripped the fabric of my tunic in his fists and a low growl escaped from the back of his throat. I was all lips and nerve endings and a body pressing against his.
I arched up into him, barely hearing the buzzing in my ears go from a slight hum to a raging vibration.
Until the mirror behind him exploded into a thousand pieces, the shards blowing outward.