Saving the World and Other Extreme Sports

100

We were prodded through long, winding stone corridors in the bowels of the castle, occasionally tripping on the uneven stone floor. I felt as though I'd been chilly for days and rubbed Angel's and Nudge's arms to help them keep warm in the dank chill.

"I hate this guy," Ari muttered, keeping his head down.

"There's a club," I told him. "The Haters of ter Borcht Club. Have you gotten your badge yet?"

Finally we were pushed into a-come on, you can guess-yes: a white, sterile-looking lablike room filled with tables holding schmancy, no doubt expensive science equipment that I longed to start whacking with a baseball bat.

Once we were in, the doors slammed shut behind us, and several Flyboys stood in front of them, guns ready.

"The meeting of the Haters of ter Borcht Club will now come to order," I murmured. Nudge swallowed a snort, and Angel projected a grin into my head. Can you do anything with him? I sent her in a directed thought.

No, came her regretful reply. I get stuff from him-awful, scary, disgusting stuff, but I can't seem to send anything in.

Which messed up Plan A.

"So!" said ter Borcht, coming toward us. "I vass verry disappointed dat you are not dead by now!"

"Vee feel de same vay about you!" I said, crossing my arms over my chest.

His eyes narrowed. Really, sometimes I impress even me.

"But I don't tink I vill haf to vait dat much longer," he said. "Maybe by dinner, yah? In de meantime, some people vant to talk to you."

"This oughtta be good," I whispered.

"Five bucks says they're scientists," Total whispered back.

"No kidding."

The doors swung open behind us, and a team of five people walked in. They were Chinese? I wasn't sure.

"Tsk," said Total. "Last season's white lab coats. So tacky."

"How can you tell?" I asked, not bothering to lower my voice.

"This year's has smaller pockets and wider lapels. Their coats are so...I don't know. Revenge of the Nerds?"

The five Asian whitecoats looked confused, and ter Borcht practically had steam coming out his ears.

"Enuff!" he snapped, clapping his hands together hard. "Dey vill ask you qvestions. You vill answer. Are ve clear?"

"Clear as pea soup!" I said.

If ter Borcht could have hit me, he would have. I guess he didn't want to do it in front of the Clean Team.

Instead, purple in the face, he stalked behind his desk and sat down, angrily shuffling papers. The Clean Team came closer, looking at us curiously, as if we were a zoo exhibit. Gee, I haven't felt like that before.

We stayed quiet, but inside I was getting more and more tense. I could take all five of these yahoos out by myself, I thought. And ter Borcht too, as a bonus. Not to mention the Flyboy guards, guns and all. What stopped me? My collar. For all I knew, all he had to do was press a button, and I would drop to the ground, electrocuted.

The Asian scientists talked softly among themselves. I remembered hearing that some country had wanted to buy us, to use as weapons somehow. I know, I know, it sounds totally loony, a child wouldn't believe it, but you have no idea how incredibly stupid the war guys can be.

Slowly the whitecoats walked around me, Nudge, and Angel, seeming to marvel at how incredibly lifelike we were. Total they ignored completely. When they looked at Ari, they couldn't disguise their dismay. I'd gotten so used to his appearance that it didn't register on me anymore. Ari didn't look human, didn't look like an Eraser. He just looked like a mistake.

His face flushed as he caught their expressions, and I felt really sorry for him. He'd gone from being a cute three-year-old kid to being a hulking patchwork monster within four short years. He knew what he looked like, knew he was dying, and he didn't understand why any of it had happened.