The Beginning and the End

TWENTY-TWO

“Hussein,” he said with surprise.

Hassanein observed a change in the color of Hussein’s face, who, though livid with anger, was exerting his utmost effort to control himself and keep his anger in check. Hassanein wondered why his brother had come up to the roof. Probably Hussein had followed him. On his way to give his lesson, he may have seen Hassanein warily climbing up the stairs to the roof and become suspicious. This was the only rational explanation. However, it was out of character for Hussein to hide himself, to eavesdrop and spy. It did not occur to Hassanein to ask his brother why he had done it. On the contrary, he was overcome by shyness and confusion. Despite his anger, Hussein’s shyness and confusion were no less. Perhaps Hussein sought to conceal his own feelings by exaggerated anger.

“I have seen certain things that offend me very much,” he said. “How dare you chase the girl in this rude manner? Your behavior is disgraceful and is not becoming of a neighbor, who respects the obligations of neighborliness!”

Hassanein found relief in his brother’s cruel tone, as it saved him from shyness and confusion. He answered angrily, “I have not committed anything shameful. Perhaps you heard what I said.”

Ignoring this last remark, Hussein said, more angrily than before, “You think there is nothing shameful in blocking the girl’s way in that disgraceful manner?”

“I do not think she considers it so.”

“She will tell her father,” Hussein said.

“She won’t.”

Overcome by his anger, Hussein retorted sharply, “I was very much afraid you would attack her. Had you done so, I would have punished you cruelly.”

Hassanein was surprised at this belated threat. Anger was about to make him lose his head. Cruel words jumped to the tip of his tongue. But, miraculously, he managed to keep them under control. He fell into deep silence until the intensity of anger diminished.

“You shouldn’t be afraid that I would do anything of that sort,” he said.

Hussein thought a little. Then he retracted. “Anyhow, I am delighted to hear you say so. And if I have the right to give you counsel, I advise you always to maintain honor.”

Coldly, Hassanein replied, “I don’t need such advice.”

He left his place. Hussein followed him. They went down together in silence. Hussein did not go to Farid Effendi’s flat. Hassanein noticed that, but he did not comment.

“What made you come back so quickly?” Samira asked Hussein.

“Salem has not studied his last lesson, and I shall see him tomorrow,” Hussein answered.

They went to their room. Hussein sat on his chair at the desk. Hassanein went on to the window, opened it, and sat on the edge of the bed. He thought: The worst end for the best beginning. How foolish of him! How did he allow himself to spy on me. He spoiled the poetry of this happy situation. No. Nothing could ever spoil it. Everything will disappear; but she will remain shining, happy, and fascinating. Never shall I forget the moment of her silence, which said far more than words. She said everything without uttering a word.

“Close the window. Are you mad?”

He was frightened by Hussein’s cry. Then anger and obstinacy filled his heart.

“The weather is gentle and comfortable,” he said.

“Don’t be stubborn; close the window!” Hussein shouted at him.

His brother’s tone only made him more obstinate. “Move to the other chair to keep away from the draft, if you think there is one!”

Hussein snorted angrily. He went to the window and violently slammed it shut with a disturbing bang that ripped the silence to shreds, and broke a windowpane. Fear and a dreadful silence prevailed. Soon Hussein became blinded by fury and, slapping Hassanein, he shouted, “It’s your fault!”

Hassanein went out of his mind and struck his brother’s head with his fist. They started to fight; Samira and Nefisa rushed into the room. In their mother’s presence, each muttering and mumbling, the boys stopped railing at each other. The mother, standing between them, eyed both angrily; then her eyes fixed on the broken glass. She inquired in a quietness that portended an approaching tempest, “What is the matter with you?”

Hassanein said hurriedly, “He slammed the window closed and broke the windowpane. Then he slapped me.”

“He opened the window in this cold weather,” Hussein said with a sob. “I asked him to close it but he was rude and refused. I got up to close it myself, and here is the result.”

Samira sighed and said, “Oh, God, your mercy be upon me. Don’t I have trouble enough?”

She gripped both of them by the shoulders and pushed them to the middle of the room. She shouted in Hussein’s face, “Aren’t you ashamed of yourself? You’re supposed to be an adult!” and punched him twice in the chest, then slapped him.

She also fell upon Hassanein, who withdrew, crying, “It was he who started beating me, and it was he who broke the windowpane.”

But she slapped him hard on the mouth and kept hitting his head and face until Nefisa intervened.

“I don’t want to hear another sound from you,” Samira shouted. “As for the window, it will remain broken until you repair it yourselves.”

Downcast and filled with unhappiness, she left the room. Nefisa stood between them for a while in distress.

“The time for quarreling is over,” she said. “You are men now!”

Then, smiling, she said to Hussein, “You couldn’t bear the draft for a little while. What are you going to do now that it is permanently open? Fill the hole with a newspaper. If you don’t, you are both good for nothing.”

Finding that her words did not have the effect she expected, she left the room. Hussein silently went back to his chair. Meanwhile, Hassanein excitedly threw himself on the bed. Often the quarrels between them ended with such intervention on their mother’s part. Despite their close friendship, their life was not free from arguments and quarrels and occasional jealousy. Yet they always remained loving and brotherly companions, indispensable to each other. Of the two, Hussein was the wiser, Hassanein the stronger. Hussein undertook the task of guiding and directing in whatever problems presented themselves; the bulk of these being related to play and minor questions about money. Hassanein bore the larger burden of defense in any fight they had with outsiders. In fights with other schoolboys, they never asked their elder brother Hassan for help when they felt they might be overcome by their adversaries, or even if a quarrel threatened to become a really bloody scrap. Anyhow, the two brothers had seldom quarreled in recent years, and consequently their mother rarely punished them with a beating. A long period of peace, about a year, had preceded this latest quarrel. However, no quarrel estranged them from each other for more than a day, and thereafter they always became reconciled. Then the aggressor, a little confused, began to speak to his brother, and both soon forgot all about their scrap. Their mother suffered from it more than they did. Their quarrels distressed her and left a piercing and profound pain in her heart. To punish them, she found no means better than beating, hoping that it would rectify the ill effects of their father’s tendency to spoil his children. Nothing was more repulsive to her than seeing one of her sons trespass beyond the limits and show any sign of transgression against the sacred unity of the family. She saw in Hassan’s life a bad example; she would rather die than see it repeated in the others. Hassan himself was not exempt from her blows, but these came too late. She never ceased to blame herself and her husband for spoiling him, and she was bitterly tortured by the fact that her son was a victim of lenience as well as poverty.

A part of the night passed, but the two brothers were still silent and alienated. The silence became more oppressive after Samira and Nefisa went to sleep. Hussein started to read a book, in an attempt to concentrate his scattered thoughts. Hassanein was secretly watching him, wondering how he should feel toward his brother. Hassanein cherished happy, consoling, and reassuring memories. Soon a smile appeared on his lips, and he thought: All is well. Bahia kept silent, which means that she loves me. Really! How I yearn to hear it uttered by her luscious lips. Be patient. All this will come in time. Silence is only a beginning. But the end…? Suddenly, he turned to his brother and the smile returned to his lips. What harm would I have suffered if I had closed the window? He seems unable to follow what he is reading. Had he been endowed with my good fortune, he would not have found it difficult to forget all that happened. He felt a kind of sympathy for his brother.