Time of Death

46

Ricky Parry stared at the floor. Ren could see tears dropping on to the carpet. So many tears. ‘I sat on the plane,’ said Ren. ‘And I thought about you all the way-’

‘I couldn’t handle it: the playing cards bringing it all back,’ said Ricky. ‘My mother wanted to be part of that — she heard about it and wanted Louis to feature. And I…and there it was all over again. Louis Parry, the media, the neighbors-’

‘You couldn’t take it.’

He shook his head. ‘No.’

‘It’s dominated your entire life…’

He nodded. ‘I loved Louis.’

‘I know that,’ said Ren.

Ricky looked at her with hope in his eyes. ‘But I just ended up…I was always living in his shadow. Everyone was obsessed. My parents were never there.’

‘And when that faded a little when you were a teenager, which was perfectly understandable, the guilt ate you up. I could see that. And through it all, you still missed Louis and you felt for your parents.’

‘My father died never knowing what happened to Louis.’

Ren nodded. ‘And you didn’t want your mother to do the same.’

Ricky shook his head. ‘No. I didn’t want her to die. I don’t want her to die. And I thought, if she knew what happened to Louis, she could focus on that instead of focusing on meeting him in the next life. She kept saying that — about meeting him. I couldn’t handle it. It was like she had more to die for than she had to live for. She didn’t once talk about leaving me. She just talked about joining him. And I’m here. I’m alive, but why? What’s the point?’

‘That must have been devastating,’ said Ren. ‘But then, if it wasn’t devastating, you wouldn’t have been so desperate to-’

‘I’m so sorry, Ren. I had to do something…’

‘Jesus, Ricky. Beau? I swear to God…’

Ricky was crying. ‘I know. I’m so sorry. But he’s-’

‘Yes,’ said Ren. ‘Dead. Which makes this worse. Did you ever really know how good he was to Louis? Did you have a clue? He was so good to all the kids. He never turned anyone away. He understood them. Did you know he taught Louis for free? Those last few lessons he gave him were for free, because your parents were having a hard time. Beau was-’

‘I know all that,’ said Ricky. ‘God, I know and I’m sorry…But it was because of your family and what good people they are that I was able to do this. Your mom gave me these odd jobs to do, because she knew I needed the money. I’m not even any good. But it meant I could get into Beau’s room. It was the easiest way to…’

Ren shook her head. ‘Did your mom really believe that Beau could have done anything to Louis?’

‘She’s very weak now. She’s drifting in and out-’

‘So this was all ultimately pointless.’

‘How can you be so calm?’

‘Calm? On the outside maybe,’ said Ren. ‘How could you do this, Ricky? How?’

Ricky glanced at the door to his mother’s room as Ren’s voice started to rise.

‘Don’t,’ she shouted. ‘Don’t! Right now, I don’t care that your mother is sick in there. My brother is dead. And you tried to destroy my family all over again. All we did was try to help you.’ She was standing now. She wanted to slap him across the face. ‘Look at me,’ she shouted. ‘Look me in the eye.’

‘I’m sorry. I’m so sorry-’

‘What were you thinking? Forget about Beau — you almost closed a case that was having its last shot at being solved. Whatever happened to Louis — the person who did it is still out there. The playing card could have worked. Someone could have…come forward with new information.’ Ugh.

‘Or someone could not have,’ said Ricky. ‘It’s been nearly thirty years.’

‘Did you think this fake truth was going to seep into your consciousness so that, in a few years time, you could believe that it was Beau and you could have some closure?’

‘I wasn’t hurting anyone who was alive.’

‘Oh my God, are you insane? The whole rest of my family is alive! Do you think this doesn’t hurt?’

‘I…I’m sorry.’

‘I’m done,’ said Ren. ‘I have got to get out of here. Daryl Stroud’s outside. He’ll come talk to you.’

‘What’s going to happen?’

‘I doubt my family will want to press charges, I know I don’t, but you can give one more interview to the press. With every detail of what you did — calling Crimestoppers, planting the T-shirt. And all the details that will honor Beau’s memory — or, so help me God…’

Ren opened the front door. A patrol car was parked at the end of the path. Daryl Stroud got out and nodded as he walked towards Ren. Pumped muscles, popping neck veins, tan, buzz cut. He shook her hand.

‘Hi, Ren. What’s all this about?’

‘Ricky is your tipster. He planted the T-shirt.’

‘What? No.’

Ren nodded. ‘Yes. The world is a fucked-up place.’ She started to walk down the path. ‘He’s inside. Go talk to him. He’ll tell you himself.’

‘Jesus Christ. I’m-’

She kept walking. ‘So, will I see you back at your office?’ When he didn’t answer, she turned around.

Daryl looked frozen.

‘Did you think that was it?’ said Ren. ‘I was just going to go quietly back to Denver?’

‘Does it have to be the office? Can we go to Bob’s?’

‘Sure,’ said Ren. ‘What the hell.’

Ren got into her hire car and called her mother’s house.

‘Ren? Where are you?’

‘In Catskill. I’m calling to let you know that everything is OK about Beau.’

‘In Catskill? What-’

‘I’m not staying for long. I’m exhausted. I’m calling to fill you in. I’m heading back to Denver on the next flight. It was Ricky Parry who-’

‘Ricky Parry?’

‘Let me finish. It was Ricky Parry who rang in the tip, who put the T-shirt in Beau’s room. He made the hole in the headboard when he was doing whatever work he was doing on the house.’

‘Ricky Parry? But-’

‘I know. It’s terrible.’

‘But, I always looked out for Ricky. I gave him work, I sent him over meals when his father was ill and his mother…I did everything I could for that family…’

‘He was desperate, Mom. He just wanted to relieve some of his mother’s suffering. He couldn’t do anything about the physical pain, but he thought this would take away some of the mental pain. It doesn’t excuse anything. You can’t take this personally. Beau was the easiest person to set up. Ricky had access to the house. And Beau couldn’t defend himself.’

‘But I don’t think Mrs Parry would have been relieved to think that Beau did this. She sent Louis to our house for tuition, she would have blamed herself for-’

‘You’re just going to have to stop looking for logic in all this,’ said Ren. ‘There is none.’

‘But-’

‘Don’t torture yourself, Mom. Ricky Parry was just screwed up. That’s as much sense as you will make of this. Let it go.’

‘I don’t know if I can.’

‘You have to,’ said Ren. ‘This is, in its own tragic way, good news. Try it, Mom. Try to feel the good news.’