Hide and Seek

"God, no! You wouldn't want a lock lit than ashed. That's what I

mean. No, this was a house over on Maple. Properly closed for the

winter. I went through a window on the ground floor. Wandered around

awhile. Somebody saw my flashlight through the living-room window."

"But why? What were you doing? Stealing?"

"Good thing I wasn't, or I wouldn't have gotten off with just a

warning. No matter how many cops my dad knew. No, that was the weird

part. I didn't go there to steal.

"When they got there- the cops, I mean- I'd just been sitting in the

living room, in this big old easy chair, wondering what the people were

like. And smoking a cigarette. I'd almost forgotten that. I guess I

did steal something. The cigarette. From a tired old pack on the

kitchen table."

We walked to the car and I thought about it. I hadn't thought about it

for years And I'm not sure I'd ever asked myself exactly what the

point had been.

"I don't know why. It was exciting. I liked it. Hiked invading their

privacy. I looked through all the drawers upstairs, but they were

mostly empty. There were some clothes in the closet. I looked through

them. I didn't know the people at all, but being in the house gave me

the feeling that I did. I liked that. That's why I was sitting in

that chair. Just thinking about them. I could almost hear their

voices.

"I have this fantasy. I'm in the city, Portland maybe. Whatever. And

I see this girl on the street. She's very attractive, so I follow her.

I follow her for days, get to know everything she does and everywhere

she goes. But she never sees me. I get to know her completely without

her ever knowing me. And then when I think I've got her completely

down cold, I go away and never come back. Like leaving a lover. She

never even knows I was there."

v oy g u r I s m.

"Sure. I get to be with her, know her, even care about her a little,

but I never have to do anything . I'm completely .. . aloof. At the

same time I'm completely committed to her, obsessive even. It's all I

do for days. You see?"

"I think so"