Killing with Confetti

8

Ben Brace shocked Caroline Irving at the New Year’s Eve Ball by asking her to marry him.

Destroyed her night out.

She wasn’t up for this, regardless that she loved Ben to bits. Okay, they were living together in some style in the Georgian house her father had bought her in Camden Crescent, Bath, but marriage was a no-no.

The band had finished playing ‘Auld Lang Syne.’ Sky rockets were shooting into the night sky and cascading over the city. People were shrieking and cheering. Difficult to tell what else was happening around her in the Assembly Rooms because Ben had grabbed her and kissed her passionately the second the new year dawned. And as their lips parted he spoke the words. He was hugging her as if she were the last upright object in a force twelve hurricane. Clearly he’d planned this. He wasn’t an impulsive man.

Big romantic moment.

The blast in Caroline’s brain was bigger than any of the thunder flashes exploding outside.

‘Lost for words?’ Ben said, smiling. ‘This isn’t like you.’

Supremely confident. In truth, slightly patronising, he was so sure of himself, but she could forgive him that.

She was going to hate hurting him.

‘You can nod if you want.’

Terrified of giving the wrong signal, she braced her neck and stared ahead like a guardsman on parade.

‘I know,’ he said, misreading the signs and taking her silence for rapture. ‘Caught you by surprise, didn’t I? Take a moment to think it over, like five seconds.’

They’d never spoken of marriage. Love, yes. Unreserved love, the best, the tops. All their friends thought of them as the ideal couple, made for each other. Ben had been so over the moon when she’d invited him to move in with her that there was no nonsense about tying the knot. Sharing had been the only decision. Caroline’s house in Camden Crescent was much bigger and more comfortable than his modest flat in Walcot.

The bride thing appealed, of course. Like most girls she’d dreamed since she was five of the big white wedding, planned the dress, the flowers, the bridesmaids, the horse and carriage, the guest list, the reception, the string quartet and the honeymoon. No expense spared. Money had never been a problem.

Money wasn’t the issue.

‘That’s at least fifteen seconds,’ Ben said.

‘I love you,’ Caroline managed to say.

‘So?’

How to handle this: she was at a loss.

He said, ‘I thought this was how you’d like it done, the new year and all that. Want me to kneel? Slightly embarrassing, but if that’s your wish, love of my life, I’m up for it.’

‘Oh, Ben!’ She shook her head. ‘Shall we go outside? It’s so noisy here.’

He released her from the embrace. Still holding her hand, he pushed through animated revellers towards the exit. Caroline, racking her brain for something plausible to say, was pulled after him.

A sharp breeze was blowing in from Bennett Street. ‘We don’t need to go right outside,’ she told him, so they stood next to a sedan chair in the crossing point between rooms where it was less noisy.

‘You’re not going to tell me you’re married already?’ he said in a jovial way that didn’t exclude a small concern that she might be.

‘You’ve got a bloody nerve.’

He reddened. ‘Sorry.’

Her sharp reaction had stopped him in his tracks. Her chance to explain why she couldn’t accept. She’d need to be tactful, but clear. ‘Don’t get me wrong, Ben. I truly appreciate being asked. The thing is, a wedding isn’t just about the couple getting hitched. It’s about a lot of other things.’

‘Tell me about it. I’ve been best man twice.’

‘I’m not talking about the way it’s done.’

‘Religion? It doesn’t have to be in a church.’

‘Not that.’

‘Friends and family?’

‘In a way, yes.’

‘I didn’t think you were all that close to your family,’ he said. ‘The few times I’ve mentioned them, you change the subject somehow.’

‘Am I that obvious?’ She took a deeper breath. ‘Actually I’m not too proud of my lot, but I love them. Blood ties and all that.’

‘Would they object to me?’

‘How could they? They haven’t even met you.’

‘To my family?’

‘They don’t know them either.’ She was in denial. Every fibre of her body was tensed for the car crash she saw coming.

‘My dad being in the police?’ he said. But his father wasn’t just ‘in the police.’ He was one of the highest-ranking officers in Avon and Somerset, Deputy Chief Constable George Brace.

‘That’s never been mentioned.’

‘But it is the problem, isn’t it? I can see it in your eyes. Listen, Carrie, my love, Dad’s all right. First impressions can be so misleading. He’s got this high-powered job and he has to act the part, but that isn’t the man I know at home. Get him out of uniform and he’s a teddy bear, really, I promise you.’

‘You don’t have to,’ Caroline said. ‘I liked him. He was really sweet to me and so was your mum.’ Ben had introduced her to his parents in November after the Remembrance Day parade and service, and they’d all gone back to Camden Crescent for sandwiches and a drink. The solemn rituals in the abbey may not have been the ideal preparation for a relaxed first meeting but, to his credit, Deputy Chief Constable Brace had taken off his silver-trimmed tunic and loosened his tie and helped in the kitchen, talking warmly to her. If he was uncomfortable about his son being in a relationship, he didn’t show it at all.

‘Where did we go wrong, then?’ Ben asked.

‘Nobody went wrong, as you put it. You and I are living together. Can’t we leave it at that? I’m just not ready for marriage.’ She was about to add that she would never be ready, but she’d already said enough to ruin the start of their year. He didn’t deserve the full let-down, poor guy.

He wasn’t giving up. ‘Can’t you tell me why? You seemed to be saying just now it was about family, yet I got the feeling you didn’t mind mine that much.’

‘Aren’t you listening? I liked them, Ben. They’re lovely people. Can we leave it now?’

‘I’ve really goofed, haven’t I? Idiot.’

He’d gone pale. A worse thought took root in Caroline’s head. Had he already bought the ring? ‘Please, Ben.’

‘I can’t think how I got you so wrong,’ he said. ‘I was sure you’d say yes.’

This was getting harder by the second. She sensed a real danger of her stand becoming such an issue that he’d end the relationship, and how could she blame him if he did? She was the one in the wrong, unwilling to say why it was impossible. ‘It’s me,’ she said, ducking it again. ‘I can’t handle shocks. Call me immature if you like, but it’s the way I am. Can we go back to the party?’

‘I shocked you? It wasn’t meant like that. I planned it as a nice surprise.’

She nodded. ‘I know, and I’m sorry, Ben.’ She reached for his hand and squeezed it.

‘Tell me you might be persuaded if I give you time to get used to the idea.’

She shut her eyes. ‘Don’t push me. Please.’

‘I think we ought to leave,’ he said. ‘Let’s face it, we’re neither of us in the mood for partying.’