Last Orders

New Cross

Vie says, 'Pam sends regards. Shell be thinking of us.'

Lenny says, 'Same goes for Joan.'

Vince says, 'And Mandy.'

I reckon if wives are being mentioned I should shut up.

Vince says, 'It was good to see Pam at the funeral, Vie. Aint often we get the pleasure.'

Vie says, 'Sad pleasure.'

Lenny says, 'Went a treat.'

We're coming up to the lights by New Cross Gate station and the traffic's slowing to a crawl.

I don't suppose Carol's even heard. I'dVe got the shock of my life if she'd showed up at the funeral.

Lenny says, 'They might all've come along too. Joan was all set But I suppose if Amy—'

I say, 'I don't know how we'dVe squeezed in seven of us, Lenny, even into this thing.'

Vince says, 'Four of us is comfy. Maybe it's a blokes' job anyway.'

I say, 'Five.'

Vince says, 'Five.' Then he says, 'It aint a thing, Raysy, it's a Mercedes.'

Lenny looks at me then at the traffic all around us. 'Still, aint no car built yet that'll beat a jam, is there, Big Boy?'

Lenny's a stirrer.

Vie says, 'Pam was all for doing us sandwiches and a thermos but I said I thought we were old enough to take care of ourselves.' He's holding the box like it might be his lunch.

Vince says, 'She's a good 'un, Vie. It was good to see her.'

Lenny says, 'Joan was dead set'

We creep forward five yards then stop. People are walking past us on the pavement, slipping into the station entrance like it's an ordinary day. We should have a flashing sign up:

Lenny says, 'Every car's the same in a snarl-up, aint it?'

Vince drums his fingers on the steering wheel.

Vie says, 'Anyhow Pam says he's got a good guard-of-honour.'

We all straighten up, as if we've got to be different people, as if we're royalty and the people on the pavement ought to stop and wave.