The Mysteries of Max: Books 25-27

Chapter 42

“Wha-what happened?” Tex said as he took in the devastation of his once immaculate front room.

“Dudley did this,” said Max. “He tried to set us on fire—again. But not before he stole your goatherd figurine—the one you glued back together—and your gnome painting.”

Odelia dutifully translated Max’s words for those unable to understand him, drawing gasps of shock from Uncle Alec, Charlene and of course her dad.

“My son did this?” asked Dad, flabbergasted.

“Um, Tex,” said Uncle Alec, placing a large hand on Odelia’s dad’s shoulder. “I just got a text from Abe Cornwall. I’m sorry to have to tell you this, but I had the lab run a DNA test and the result came back negative. Which means that Dudley… he isn’t yours, buddy.”

“About that,” said Dad, giving his brother-in-law a very stern look. “I’ve been meaning to talk to you. I mean, doing a DNA test behind my back— Wait, what did you just say?”

“Dudley Checkers? He’s not yours.”

“Dudley isn’t my son?!” Dad cried, staggering a little.

“I knew it!” said Gran.

“But… he looks just like me! My spitting image!”

“No, he doesn’t,” said Mom, who was recovering fast from her attack of food poisoning.

“Oh, and one other thing,” said Max. “Rambo saw Dudley put something in Marge’s milk. And I saw him receive a suspicious package just before. So I think it’s safe to say that Dudley tried to kill Marge.”

“What?!” Marge cried. She turned to her husband. “Your son tried to poison me!”

“He’s not my son,” said Dad defensively.

“I knew it!” Gran repeated.

“And Clarice saw how Dudley tripped up Tex and made him knock his head against the kitchen table,” Harriet said now.

“And I’m pretty sure he probably was to blame for those other accidents, too,” said Max.

“We put out the fire with our pee,” Dooley announced happily. “Though Rambo peed the most.”

“This is too much,” said Gran, shaking her head. “And all under the nose of my watch.” She pointed a finger at her son-in-law. “Your son tricked my watch, Tex! He tricked us!”

“He’s not my son!” said Dad.

“So where is he?” asked Uncle Alec. “We need to stop him before he leaves town.”

“I don’t know,” said Max. “He set us on fire and then he skedaddled.”

Odelia faithfully played translator again, causing her uncle and her boyfriend to share a look of concern.

And then they both sprang into action, grabbing their respective phones and hurrying out of the house to see if they couldn’t catch up with Dudley.

“Oh, no, you don’t,” said Gran, and took out her phone, too. “The watch will catch him!” And then she was off, too.

Odelia cast a glance at her cats and their guard dog and they all gave her a nod of agreement.

“We’ll catch him,” Max announced.

Odelia then crouched down next to Clarice. “I’m so sorry, honey,” she said. “I guess I allowed myself to be bamboozled by Dudley, too. Can you ever forgive me?”

Clarice gave her a cold look. “Forgive you? Maybe. But I’ll never forget.” But then she grinned, and said, “Of course I’ll forgive you, Odelia. And now let’s get the bastard!”

So while Mom and Dad surveyed the devastation that Dudley’s actions had caused to the house, three teams started what is commonly termed a dragnet: the police department, led by Uncle Alec and Chase, the local neighborhood watch, led by Gran, and a troupe of cats, led by… no one in particular.

“He can’t have gotten far,” said Odelia as she glanced up and down the street.

“I wouldn’t be so sure,” said Max. “He arrived in a cab, and I’m pretty sure he kept the cab waiting, so he’s probably on his way to New York by now, or wherever he’s going.”

Odelia nodded, and got busy calling the different cab companies that covered Hampton Cove. She got lucky with the third one, but unlucky in that she didn’t have her pickup, but lucky again when her grandmother came driving up, Scarlett riding shotgun. Gran rolled down the window and yelled, “Wanna ride with the watch, honey?”

“I thought you’d never ask,” said Odelia, and soon she was filing into the car, followed by five cats and one dog, causing Scarlett to screw up her face and yell, “So smelly!”

But then Gran put her foot down on the accelerator and they were all thrown back against the seats.

“Where are we going?” asked Gran after a moment.

“He’s heading to New York,” Odelia said. “In a cab. And I’ve got the cab’s number.”

“Better tell your uncle,” said Gran. “So he can call the cab company and tell the cab driver that he’s got a fugitive in the back of his cab.”

So Odelia did as she was told, and as they took the on-ramp to I-495, the Long Island Expressway, suddenly two squad cars joined them: one was Chase’s, the other one Uncle Alec’s, and so now the three teams were organizing a joint pursuit.

“I like this,” said Brutus. “Almost like being in an action movie.”

“My money is on your grandmother,” said Clarice. “She clearly got the skills.”

Odelia didn’t think her gran had the skills, but what she certainly had was a lack of respect for the rules and regulations covering road safety, which gave her the edge.

And as they were zooming along the road, Odelia did some quick thinking. “So if Dudley tried to kill Mom, and Dad, and you, Gran—and me, with that car crash… he must have had a reason, right? And seeing as he left the hospital and packed his bags the moment Charlene announced that the mall project was scrapped, I’m assuming it must have had something do with those millions he thought Mom and Dad were coming into.”

“So he sweet-talked his way into our family,” said Gran. “And tried to get rid of us one by one, hoping to lay his hands on that money?”

“That’s what it looks like.”

“The bastard,” said Scarlett. “Wait till I get my hands on that rotten kid.”

“No, wait till I get my hands on that no-good kid,” growled Gran.

“Let’s just try to catch him first, shall we?” Odelia suggested. “And not get ourselves killed in the process—Gran, watch it!” she added when Gran practically rear-ended a truck she apparently felt should get out of her flight path.

Odelia had Clarice on her lap, and was tickling the cat behind the ears, causing her to purr happily.

“You know?” said Clarice. “When you kicked me out I just figured it was par for the course—just another nasty human. But you’re not like most humans, Odelia. You and your family? You’re all right. And I just hate that kid for what he put you through.”

“I’m the one to blame,” said Odelia. “I should have done my due diligence. Who lets a person into their home, into their life, believing the stories they tell, without seeing if they really are who they say they are? I really dropped the ball on this one. Big time.”

“I didn’t like him from the start,” said Gran, shaking her head as she sat hunched over the wheel, her foot all the way down to the metal, the engine a high whine.

“That’s because you don’t like anyone,” said Scarlett as she checked her lipstick in the little visor mirror.

“Not true. I like you!”

“That’s what you say.”

“No, I really do!”

“Well, I don’t like you.” When Gran’s jaw fell, Scarlett laughed. “I’m kidding! You’re my buddy, buddy. And now will you please keep your eyes at the road, for Christ’s sakes?”

“I wonder how Dudley knew about Mom and Dad’s piece of land, though, and the mall development,” said Odelia.

“We’re about to find out,” said Gran, and gestured with her head to a cab that had shown up in front of them—its taillights glowing in the darkness, the Taxi sign on the roof drawing them in like a homing beacon.

And before Odelia could tell her grandmother to play this cool, Gran was already leaning on the horn.

“Just rear-end him,” said Scarlett.

“No, don’t rear-end him!” said Odelia.

“Just hit him, Vesta—hit him!”

“Don’t hit him!”

“She’s going to kill us, Max,” said Dooley sadly. “And we’re not going to be able to pee our way out of this one.”

“I’ll just give him a little nudge, shall I?” said Gran, her tongue between her lips in utter concentration. “Bend that fender?”

“Get the sucker!” said Scarlett, clearly not the good influence on Gran that Odelia had thought she was.

Gran had sped up, and was now alongside the cab. The driver was glancing over, and making circular motions with his finger against his temple, and yelling something Odelia couldn’t hear. And then she saw Dudley, and her so-called brother did not look pleased to see her.

“Just hit him!” said Scarlett. “Do it the watch way!”

But luckily for them, a police siren suddenly sounded behind them, as Uncle Alec and Chase had finally caught up with them after the crazy chase. And the cab driver quickly pulled over to the shoulder of the road.

“Oh, bummer!” said Gran, who’d just yanked the wheel to force the other car off the road. So instead she just parked in front of the cab, then backed up so their fenders touched, making sure the cab driver couldn’t pull a fast one on her and get away.

“Why does your son always have to go and spoil the fun?!” Scarlett cried.

Odelia, though, heaved a sigh of relief, and so did five cats and one dog.

And as they got out of the car, Odelia saw to her surprise that Dudley was making a run for it!

And soon five humans, five cats and one dog were in hot pursuit of the prodigal son.

Scarlett soon dropped out of the impromptu race, as her high heels weren’t exactly conducive to this kind of frenetic activity. And then Gran had to give up, too.

“Stitch in my side!” the old lady yelled. “Go get him, hun!”

Uncle Alec was the next one to give up, and then it was just Chase and Odelia, and of course the entire pet contingent.

Dudley kept darting anxious glances over his shoulder.

“Give it up, Dudley!” Chase shouted.

“Get away from me!” Dudley screamed.

“Just stop!” said Odelia. “There’s nowhere for you to go!”

“Leave me alone!”

Suddenly Rambo, of all pets, seemed to have found his second wind, for he came bounding up from the rear, and as Odelia watched on, he raced up to the fugitive, and before Dudley knew what was happening, the giant Bulldog tackled him from behind!

And then five cats were upon the kid, with Clarice, especially, digging her claws in.

And by the time Odelia and Chase arrived, their hot pursuit had turned into a rescue mission, as Odelia’s pets clearly weren’t holding back now that they’d got their guy.

“Help!” said Dudley as he tried to fend off the cat frenzy. “Heeeeelp meeeeeee!”

“I told you to stop,” said Odelia, and had to physically drag Clarice off the guy. “That’s enough,” she said, and her cats all downed weapons. Rambo, still sitting on the man’s back, had made himself comfortable, and produced a sonorous but happy bark.

“He’s asking permission to bite,” said Max.

“No—no biting!” said Odelia.

Rambo barked some more.

“And now he’s asking permission to drool.”

“Drool?”

And without further ado, Rambo started drooling all over the back of Dudley’s head. Soon the kid was looking like a drowning victim. And as he spat out the drool, he cried, “Yuck! It’s in my mouth!”

“Serves you right,” said Chase, and got out a pair of nice shiny handcuffs, then launched into his arrest procedure with visible satisfaction.

And as Dudley was hauled off, Odelia asked, “Why did you do it, Dudley?”

Dudley shrugged. “The money, what else? Millions and millions, or so I’d been told.”

“Told by who?”

He was still spitting out goo. “Frank Butterwick. I used to work for him, and he knew everything about this mall project. They’d asked him to install a pool on the roof.”

Odelia narrowed her eyes at the kid. “So you’re Brett? Brett Cragg?”

He grinned. “Now aren’t you the clever one… sis.”

Odelia glanced at Chase. “Better add one more charge to Brett’s charge sheet.”

“Yeah, what’s that?”

“The murder of Frank Butterwick.”

“Oh, the old fool had it coming,” said Dudley, proving himself to be anything but the son of Odelia’s dad.

And when she thought about all he’d done, Odelia suddenly found herself hauling off and slapping the kid across the face.

Dudley moved his jaw. “I guess I deserved that.”