Honor and Betray

Chapter Nineteen

I watched Emma as she drove us away from her home. Her body was stiff, and the muscle in her jaw ticked as she gripped the steering wheel tightly. She reached out and turned on the radio, smiling as the song filled the tiny space and drowned out my thoughts. A small smile tugged at the corners of her lips, and I wanted to know what was going through her mind.

She quickly changed the station and her face went blank. She was guarding herself from me. I didn’t take my eyes off her until we pulled into the bottom floor garage of my place. Emma kept her eyes locked ahead, and I knew she was having second thoughts. I got out of the car and grabbed her bag from the back seat of her old, beat-up white Rabbit.

Emma got out of the vehicle as her eyes danced over the steps ahead. I didn’t want her to feel forced. I wanted her to come inside on her own. I needed her to want to be here.

I unlocked the door and pushed it open, taking a step back. Her eyes met mine as she stepped inside. Relief washed over me as I followed her in and locked the door behind us. I could endure being locked inside my own personal hell if I had her by my side. Emma stretched and yawned in front of me. I took a step closer so I was nearly against her back.

“Want to go to bed?” I whispered against her ear and saw a shiver run through her. I could feel that monster inside of me begin to waken, and I wanted to pick her up and drag her up to that floor. I wanted to see the look in her eyes as I tightened down the straps. I stepped around her and held out my hand for her to take. “Come.”

Her fingers slid into mine, and I couldn’t help but smile as I pulled her toward my bedroom. She stopped as we entered the room, her hand slipping from mine as she stared down at the bed. I couldn’t shake the thought of feeling her skin against mine. I dropped her bag next to the door, pulled my shirt over my head, and tossed it on the floor. She watched as I began to unbuckle my belt, letting my jeans ride low on my hips.

“Maybe I should take the couch.” She looked afraid but the way her chest was rising quickly, I knew she was feeling what I was. She turned toward the door, and without thinking, I wrapped my arms around her waist from behind. My cock strained against my jeans as I pushed against her ass. I groaned as I closed my eyes, breathing in her flowery scent. This was the man she was running from. I needed to keep her safe from that side of me.

“Please don’t leave me,” I whispered against the shell of her ear. Her body relaxed, but I kept my grip firm. “Whatever you want from me…whatever you need from me, I will give it to you. Just please don’t leave me.”

“I want…I need time.”

It took every ounce of strength for me to release her and take a step back. She sighed as she turned back to face me. Her eyes locked on to mine as her fingers began to unbutton her jeans. She slid them over her hips and pushed them down. I did the same, never taking my eyes off hers.

She swallowed hard as she climbed into the bed and slid under the covers, curling on her side away from me. I crawled in beside her, forcing myself to keep distance between our bodies. I deserved the torture of being next to her and not being allowed to hold her. But we both knew that holding her wasn’t all I wanted.

Emma reached under the blanket, and I felt her body wiggle as she pulled her shirt up over her head and tossed it on the floor, and I was unable to breathe. I wasn’t strong enough. I reached out like a moth drawn to a flame and slid my fingers across her hip. I wasn’t the moth, though. I was the flame that would consume Emma if given the chance. I had done it once, and if I wanted to have her in my life, I couldn’t let that happen again. I was on my side, looking at the top of her bared back as I gently pulled on her hip, causing her to fall on her back. I looked down at her, quivering as she stared back at me. I ran my fingers over her jaw, and her lips parted.

My mouth inched closer to hers, but I refused to act. I couldn’t allow myself to be the man on the third floor. I needed to be what she wanted. Her chest began to rise and fall more rapidly as her breath blew across my mouth.

She pushed against my shoulder and I fell onto my back, certain she had made her decision, but her leg slid over my waist, brushing against my hard cock, and she lifted herself to straddle my waist.

She gripped my boxers and began to tug them down, her nails biting into my skin. I slid a hand over her hipbone, struggling against the urge to pull her down against me.

“I need you, Emma. Please…” I didn’t want to take her. There would be no turning back if I let that side of me that lingered below the surface come out. I slipped my fingers just inside the fabric of her panties, rubbing against her inner thigh.

“Aah…” she panted, and I ran my tongue over my lips, wanting to taste the delicate flesh between her thighs.

“Rip them,” she panted, and my eyes connected with hers. She was begging for the monster. “Rip them,” she repeated. I didn’t know how close to the edge I could go before I couldn’t stop myself from giving in to what I wanted, but I wasn’t strong enough to resist her. I gripped the fabric in my fingers and tugged them, ripping them from her body and tossing them on the floor. She grabbed both my wrists, and her body fell on top of mine as she held my hands on either side of my head.

Her lips hovered over mine as she rotated her hips, running her wet pussy against my cock. We both moaned as she repeated the action. I pushed back against her, wanting to grind against her clit.

“I want to touch you,” I groaned as I pushed against her again. She sucked my bottom lip in her mouth and gently bit down.

“Fuck,” I growled as I lifted my hands from the bed, pushing against her grip. Her power was an illusion, and we both knew it, but she needed to feel in control.

“Bad boy,” she smirked as she slid her dripping slit up the length of me again. Her tongue flicked out and ran over my upper lip. I lifted my head, taking her mouth with mine. She whimpered, and her lips parted, letting me fuck her mouth with my tongue. My hips ground against hers, and she melted against me.

“Do you enjoy teasing me?” I asked and pushed my tongue back inside her mouth more forcefully. It didn’t matter if she was on top of me; I was going to control this.

“You don’t like it?”

“I’ll take you any way I can get you.” Visions of the ways I wanted her flashed through my mind. I would have her every one of those ways in time. As her clit pressed against the head of my cock, I pulled back and pushed against her entrance, thrusting inside of her in one quick motion. She whimpered, but her thighs widened so I could fill her completely. She buried her face in my neck as I fucked her, her hips pushing back against mine with equal need.

“God…I love you,” she moaned into my neck, and my body froze. I had been wrong. I wasn’t the one in control. Emma owned me with those three little words.

“You love me?” I asked, but she lay frozen on top of me, her face buried in my neck.

“Look at me.” My voice shook as I prepared to look her in the eye. I needed to see the truth, to know that she felt what I did inside.

Her head slowly turned, and her sad, frightened eyes locked on to mine. There was more there behind the pain and the hurting, and it was undeniable. I slowly raised my hips, sliding deep inside of her. Her body began to move with mine, and we kept focused on each other as her body tightened around me, begging me to come with her. I filled her as she moaned, giving in to her own pleasure. In that moment, I became hers. I knew I would never be able to think of anyone else. As her body stopped trembling, she slid off me and curled up on her side, facing away from me.

I rolled onto my side, wrapping my arms around her from behind and pulling her against my chest. I trailed kisses down over her shoulder, and her body shook under my lips. I knew she was crying, and I didn’t know what to do. She had just professed her love for me, and now she was sobbing silently as I held her in my arms.

I cradled Emma until her body stilled and her breathing evened out and eventually deepened.