Honor and Betray

Chapter Four

I was on my second pot of coffee when the bedroom door opened, and Emma stepped through, already dressed for the day. I couldn’t help but smile sadly at the sight of her. I never wanted to forget how absolutely stunning she was when she first woke in the morning.

“Sleep well?” I hoped she hadn’t noticed that I hadn’t slept at all. I couldn’t force myself to close my eyes and miss out on the last few hours we may have had together. She grinned widely as she made her way toward me. I opened my arms and hugged her tightly, lifting her feet from the ground. “Shame. I was going to say if you weren’t happy, we could try again.” I winked at her as I sat her back on the ground. I was good at hiding my emotions, as I rarely felt anything outside of anger, but this was a struggle. Stephen’s words replayed in my head. He was wrong. This was love. It had to be love, and it was the most intense pain I had ever felt.

She smacked my chest playfully. Without thinking, my hand shot up and grabbed her wrist tightly.

“Careful. You know I like to play rough.” A beautiful crimson crept over her cheeks, and I had to look away to keep myself from changing my mind about being the good guy. I turned around and grabbed her a mug of coffee, already made to her taste.

“Thanks,” she smiled as she closed her eyes and inhaled. “Just what I needed.”

“I thought I was what you needed?” I frowned, but I knew I wasn’t, even if she thought differently. She took a sip from her steaming cup.

“I need this to keep up with you.” She laughed. For a minute, we were just a normal couple standing in our kitchen and enjoying each other’s company. It was the perfect lie.

“I better put on another pot, then.” I looked her over, wishing I could get just one extra day with her, but I didn’t deserve it. Didn’t deserve her.

“We can’t. We have to go see my aunt today.” She took another long sip from her mug.

I sighed and drank down the rest of my drink. “I guess we’d better get it over with, then.” I couldn’t look her in the eye. I stared down at my empty mug, fighting the urge to throw it against the wall.

“It’s not life or death, William. Worst thing that is going to happen is she will call me a whore and things will be exactly the same as they have always been.” She rolled her eyes as she spoke of her aunt and took another drink.

I only wished that were the worst thing that would happen. Instead, she would learn about my frequent visits to the sex club her aunt worked at. She, no doubt, would learn of her aunt’s infatuation with me. And the cherry on the cake will be whatever my ex had confessed to her. I knew that my ex must have told J something to convince her that I was a danger to Emma. My eyes searched her beautiful face as I pictured tears streaming down her cheeks, and I wouldn’t be able to hold her and make it all better. “Fine.” I slammed my mug on the counter and made my way to my bedroom to get ready. I grabbed a dark-gray shirt from my dresser and pulled it over my head as I made my way back into the main living area. Emma’s eyes were on my stomach as I pulled the shirt down, covering myself.

“Are you sure you don’t want to have a little fun first?” It was a last ditch effort to delay the inevitable, to feel normal if only for a few more minutes.

“Come on. Let’s just get this over with.” She sat her cup down and grabbed her purse. She held her hand out to me to take, and I did, pulling her body against mine. My lips pressed against hers, needing to feel her love for me. Her body relaxed against mine, and her lips fell open, inviting me in. I ran my tongue along her upper lip before slipping it inside and pushing against hers. She moaned into my mouth, and I knew if I really wanted to, I could delay our demise just a little while longer. My cock grew painfully hard at the thought of taking her back to my bed. I was tired of manipulating her. I pulled back, hating how alone I felt just inches from her.

“I need you.” I meant it in every sense of the words. I needed her to breathe, to feel. Without her, I knew I would lose myself again in the sadness and anger. I wouldn’t be able to come back again from the darkness. There would be no other Emma for me.

“I promise, when we get back, you can take me anywhere and anyway you like.” She grinned wickedly as she pulled her lower lip between her teeth. I would miss this. I would miss her so much it would be unbearable.

I reached up, using my thumb to free her lip from her teeth. “Let’s go.” I took her hand and pulled her behind me as we left the apartment and made our way down the stairs. I was fighting against my natural instinct of self-preservation.