Inflame

Chapter 14

Kale

AFTER PACING my living room for the better part of the afternoon, I decide that seven p.m. is way too late for me to see Lucy. I grab the sparkling grape juice out of my refrigerator and head on over, not caring that I’m going to be earlier than she expects. Part of me is actually hoping to catch her off guard, and I don’t want to wait until after dinner for us to have this conversation. I want it over and done with as soon as possible so we can celebrate the newest member of our family. Or what I hope will be our family.

I know I’m probably getting ahead of myself, but my excitement has grown the longer the day has gone on. Knowing that she’s finally going to let me in and be a part of the pregnancy has me feeling happier than I have in a long time. At least, I hope that’s where the discussion is going to lead. Pushing any negative thoughts out of my mind, I get to her place in record time.

I knock on the door impatiently, and when she opens it, she’s a sight for sore eyes. And let me tell you, mine are fucking sore beyond belief. She’s standing there in sweatpants and a t-shirt, and I swear, she’s never been more beautiful. Her eyes widen when she sees me, and she starts to speak, but I don’t let her. I set the juice on the table by her door and grab her by the waist as I push her back against the wall. Leaning down, my lips capture hers.

At first, she’s hesitant, not moving against me. I continue to kiss her, and my tongue darts out as I coax her lips apart and my hands slip beneath her shirt to rub small circles on her skin. She moans against my touch, and every tortuous second spent apart becomes a distant memory. Her tongue finally connects with mine, and I take in my fill, having missed this, missed her. I don’t know how she’ll respond to the words, so I take my time showing her just how much I’ve been craving her. She might not know realize it, but in her reaction, I can tell she’s doing the same thing, and a sense of relief washes over me from knowing that this time apart hasn’t made her totally withdraw from me.

Even though I don’t want to, I slowly pull away, recognizing that if I keep kissing her we’ll end up naked on the floor instead of talking. Like I told her, she can make it up to me with dessert, but there’s plenty we need to go over first.

“Well, that was certainly an interesting greeting,” she says, sounding breathless and oh so sexy as hell. “You’re also two hours early, Kale. I haven’t even had a chance to shower or start dinner.”

I shrug, feigning indifference. “I told you I missed you. I couldn’t wait another minute to see you. You don’t need a shower, and we can order takeout.” I watch as she bites her lower lip, and my cock springs to life. “Better yet, let’s go out. That way we’ll be safe in public and can get through this conversation without my wanting to rip your clothes off the entire time.”

A wicked grin spreads over her face. “Let me change and then we can go out. I wouldn’t want you having such dirty thoughts in your brain while we discuss our situation.”

“Our child, Lucy,” I respond and watch as her eyes soften and her smile turns wistful.

She nods and lets out a deep breath. “Our baby,” she confirms. “I’ll be right back.” She turns and quickly walks down the hall to her room.

Deciding to give her this little bit of space, I settle in on the couch, where I presume she was before I showed up. I smile when I see Top Chef on the TV, knowing it’s her favorite, and wonder if this is all she’s been doing since I left her here on Saturday.

“Ready to go?” she asks, and I almost do a double take when I look up at her.

She’s wearing the tightest pair of jeans that has molded to her ass and has me salivating, wishing to get my hands on her. A form-fitting white blouse shows off just a hint of cleavage, and a long necklace plunges in between her breasts, teasing me, knowing I want to be there, too. She goes to the hall closet, pulls out a pair of heels, and slips into them.

Clearing my throat, I’m up on my feet and in front of her. “You shouldn’t wear heels,” I tell her, and she looks at me, confused.

“Why the hell not?” she asks as she goes to get her purse from the kitchen counter.

I follow her and know I’m going to sound like a tool. “You could trip and fall. Wouldn’t wearing flat shoes be more comfortable anyway?”

She laughs and just shakes her head. “Kale, I’m fine. My feet won’t swell for months, and I’m not going to fall. I promise. Now are you ready to get me out in public?” she teases.

I give her a once-over and groan.

She smiles, and I know she did this on purpose. “Just because we’re in public doesn’t mean you can’t still want to rip my clothes off,” she informs me, and I know she’s right.

I follow as she walks to the door. “You’re right about that, but at least I won’t have the temptation of an empty bed to throw you on when I’m tired of talking.”

Laughing, she locks up, and I take her hand as I lead her to the car.

“We’ll see just how long you last, Montgomery,” she whispers, brushing up against me.

As if on cue, my dick gets the message and strains against my jeans. If he could talk, I’m pretty sure he’d be confirming it. Not fucking long.

ONCE We settle into the booth at the restaurant and place our orders, Lucy tries to start small talk. While I want all of our cards on the table and I’m thankful we’re in a dark corner with plenty of privacy, I realize that coming out in public may not have been the best idea. It seems too open, too exposed, to talk about this. I wait until we’re settling the check to even bring it up.

“Lucy, I’m glad you’re done avoiding me. I know this whole thing is probably a shock to you, to both of us, and I gave you the space you needed. I hope that was enough time, because I don’t plan on leaving you alone again.”

She looks up at me with a woeful look on her face. “I know, Kale. And I’m sorry I was shutting you out. I was trying to process everything, and I couldn’t think of facing you until I sorted myself out. It wasn’t fair to you. I promise it won’t happen again. You said we’re in this together, and that’s how I want it, as long as you still do, too.”

Wow, she kind of went all in there, well before I thought she would.

Relieved that we’re on the same page, I lean forward and take ahold of one of her hands. “I do, Luce. And I’m so glad to hear you say that. I was afraid I was going to have my work cut out for me trying to convince you. I’ve had feelings for you for a really long time, but I never thought you’d want me to make a move. I thought you were comfortable with our friendship. And yeah, maybe this happened in a little bit of a different order, but I’m so happy you want this, too. I’m ready to actually be together, done with that stupid friends-with-benefits label.”

Lucy’s eyes widen and she pulls her hand away from me. “Wait. What? Kale, I thought you meant raising the baby together. Whatever that means, but not together together. Just…together. As friends. Or whatever.”

My heart sinks at her words, and I realize I was too freaking eager for the change in our relationship. My dumb ass just assumed she naturally was in the same place as me. Closing my eyes, I take a couple of deep breaths before looking back at her.

“You want to raise the baby together as friends. Or whatever. What exactly is whatever?”

Her eyes look down at the table for a moment before she looks up at me. “Whatever is us. It’s always been us. We don’t have a definition. We never have. I love how we are and I don’t want that to change.”

“Lucy, we’re having a child together. We can’t keep being ‘whatever,’ and I don’t want to. I want you. I want our baby. I want more than ‘whatever.’” I can see the quick flash of relief in her face, but then she masks it with something else.

She leans forward, and I have to strain to hear her whisper. “I think we need to talk about this at home. Can we go please?”

Sighing heavily, I sign the tab and get up, following her out to the car, and we ride back to her place in silence. My mind is reeling, wondering how in the hell I’m going to get it through her head that this is the best thing for us. That we fit together perfectly. That it makes sense for us to be together. It’s not until we’re settled on her couch that she finally speaks up.

“Kale, what exactly is it that you want?” she asks, swallowing hard.

“You, Lucy. Do I really need to spell it out? I have feelings for you. I have for a long time and I want you to be mine. Not my friend. Not my whatever. My girlfriend. I want to be able to hold you in public. To shout from the rooftops that were dating. To tell my mom that she can finally tell her friends about you. That’s what I want, Lucy. You. All of you.”

I watch her eyes soften as my words register. “Your mom knows about me?” she asks, and I’m not surprised that’s the part she latched on to.

“My mom and my sisters. You’re important to me. You have been since the moment I met you. I’ve only told them that we’re friends, but they’ve known me my whole life and can see through the bullshit.”

“Wow,” she whispers, touching her fingers to her lips before her eyes meet mine. “Kale, I don’t want to jump into a relationship just because I’m pregnant. We can figure this out some other way.”

Groaning, I place my head in my hands, wondering how I’m going to get through to her. “I’m not declaring my feelings for you just because you’re pregnant.”

She pulls my head out of my hands and cups my cheeks. “Honestly, would you be telling me you want to be in a relationship right now if I weren’t pregnant?” She has me there, but not for the reasons she thinks.

“No, probably not, but that’s only because I didn’t think you were ready to hear it yet. I’ve felt this way for a long time, and while I’ve wanted more, I was happy to just have some form of relationship with you.”

She leans back against the couch and sighs. “Exactly. You wouldn’t be suggesting being together if I weren’t pregnant. You just admitted it.”

“But you are, and I do want it, regardless of the circumstances,” I tell her, moving closer to her and settling in between her legs so I can place my hand on her belly. “This little guy just made me speed up the process a little bit. See? Already looking out for his old man.”

“Kale,” she says softly, and I begin to panic, knowing that I need to do something to break in there. I know she cares about me, but she’s too damn scared to let anyone all the way in.

I slide my hand from her belly up to her chest, where I can feel her heart racing. She’s watching me intently, and when my hand moves down to palm her breast, she inhales sharply.

“I know this isn’t one-sided. You might not have said it out loud, but I know you care about me, too, Lucy. And I’m not leaving this apartment until you finally admit it.”

Lucy

I’M TRYING to process Kale’s words as he rubs his thumb over my nipple, but he’s too damn distracting. When I invited him over to discuss the baby, this isn’t exactly what I planned. The last thing I expected was for him to say that he wants us to be together officially, and I was caught off guard when he admitted his feelings for me. Sure, we’d glossed over it in emails while he was gone, but that was so long ago. Neither one of us ever brought the issue back up once he got home, and I thought it was just a product of his being lonely. The last thing I want is for him to be with me just because of the baby. It’s 2013 for crying out loud, and while I’d ideally be with my child’s father, I refuse to settle into a relationship just because there is a child involved.

“Stop thinking so hard, babe,” Kale says, breaking my train of thought. “It’s quite simple, really. We were both just too stubborn to realize it before now. I like you. You like me. We’re good together.”

“I know, but I’m just not sure this is the best time to be making a decision like this. My last relationship was a disaster, and I don’t want us turning out like that,” I admit, not meeting his eyes.

He lifts up off of me, and I miss his closeness, but I’m also relieved, knowing I’ll be able to think more clearly without him pressing his body against me. My relief is short-lived, however, when he picks me up in his arms and carries me back toward my room, not stopping until he places me down on my bed. I watch with hungry eyes as he slips off his t-shirt, and then he’s on the bed, lying on his side next to me. He slides a hand underneath my shirt, and I shiver as his fingers trail over my skin slowly.

“I think we do our best work in the bedroom, Ms. Dawson, don’t you?” he asks, his voice thick and husky. “Perhaps we’ll get more talking done in here, with no distractions. Now tell me. Why exactly did your last relationship end? You never told me.”

Swallowing hard, I close my eyes, really not wanting to get into this right now. “Kale, it doesn’t matter what happened with Aidan. It just didn’t work.”

Kale shakes his head, and I know he doesn’t believe me. “I don’t think so, Lucy. Something happened. I want to know. If you can’t tell your best friend, then who can you tell? Why did you split up?”

Sighing, I know he won’t stop until I admit it. I sit up and turn towards him. “Fine. You want to know why? You’re why!”

A knowing grin spreads across his face, and I know he just played me. “And how is that? I was seven thousand miles away. How could I have been the reason you two broke up?”

“It was a multitude of things. He was bothered with our relationship from the very beginning, which is why he so passive aggressively did that whole Facebook thing. But it wasn’t until the very end, when I hadn’t heard from you that things came to a head.” I pause, almost unnerved by the way he’s watching me so intently. “Every second I was with him, you were on my mind. I couldn’t get away from my email, and Heaven forbid someone try to take away my phone. I was so scared, so worried about you, and I couldn’t get you off my mind. In the end, he couldn’t compete. He knew it, I knew it, and we parted ways.”

I never thought I’d actually admit that to Kale, but now that I have, it actually feels good to get off my chest. He sits up and rests his back against the wall, his legs bent at the knees with his arms resting on them.

“Why were you scared, Lucy?” he asks as if all the other stuff I said doesn’t matter.

“I was afraid to lose you,” I answer quietly, almost whispering.

He lowers his legs to the bed and spreads them, making room for me. “Come here, Luce,” he requests, and I comply. I settle in with my back against his bare chest, and he wraps his arms around me. “Why were you afraid to lose me?”

Closing my eyes, I draw in a deep breath before answering him. “Because I care about you. More than I’ve cared about anyone in a long time, and the thought of you no longer being in my life was unbearable.”

“You care about me as a friend? Just a friend?”

This is it. Kale’s leaving it up to me to decide where our relationship is going to go. I replay my last few words in my head, and I make my decision. I let him know as I shake my head no, and I feel his chest contract as he lets out the breath I could tell he was holding.

“Then as what, Lucy? I need to hear you say it. To know you feel the same way I do.”

I turn in his arms, needing to see his face, to look into his eyes as I finally admit my feelings to him. “You know when I was joking and said you’ve ruined me for all others? Well, I guess the joke’s on me, because it looks like I was dead serious.”

He lets out a low chuckle and presses his forehead into mine. “Lucy Dawson, are you saying what I think you’re saying?”

“I don’t know, Kale. I’m a second-grade teacher, not a mind reader,” I tease, almost surprised at the lightness in my tone. I thought admitting my feelings for Kale would have been more epic, but instead, it’s just like us. It’s easy. It’s comfortable. And it feels so right. “And I don’t expect you to be a mind reader either, so let me spell it out for you. I’ve had feelings for you for a long time. I was too scared to admit it to you. Or even to myself. And truth be told, I’m scared as hell now. I love what we are, and it terrifies me that we’ll find some way to mess things up. But you’re right. ‘Whatever’ doesn’t cut it for us. We can be so much more if we just take the plunge. I’m tired of fighting it and I’m tired of being cautious. So, Kale Montgomery, I guess what I’m asking is will you, the father of my unborn child, also like to be my boyfriend?”

I hold my breath as I wait for him to answer, and boy does he make me wait for it. He’s watching me, and I can’t read his expression. Feeling uncomfortable with the silence, I start to scoot off the bed, but he pulls me back, pushing me down on the bed as he hovers over me.

“Way to steal a guy’s thunder, Lucy,” he says, and I wrinkle my brow in confusion. “Seriously, once Charlie and the guys hear that you asked me out, I’ll never hear the end of it. Just know I had every intention of doing it myself. I was just trying to wear you down. I guess I didn’t realize how awesome my own skills were.” He leans down and places a soft kiss on the tip of my nose.

Slipping my arms around his neck, I lean up, giving him a hug before lying back down. “Sorry, babe. You picked the lock, and as soon as the floodgates opened, I couldn’t shut the hell up. If you want to ask, I promise I won’t tell anyone I did it first.”

He grins down at me. “Are you kidding? I don’t give a shit about the guys. I can’t wait to tell our kid that his momma chased me until I couldn’t say no. So, yes, babe. I, as the father to your awesome unborn child, would be honored to also be your boyfriend.”

“You’re such an ass,” I tell him as I turn on my side, trying to pretend that my heart isn’t racing at the thought that just a moment ago Kale Montgomery became my boyfriend. I feel like squealing like I see my students do on a daily basis, but I somehow keep myself calm. He lies down behind me, wraps his arm around my waist, and pulls me in close, but I won’t let him distract me. “We still have a lot to talk about, you know.”

“I know, but for now, let me just bask in the knowledge that I wore you down to the point that you asked me to be your boyfriend.”

Shaking my head, I sigh. “You will never let that go, will you?”

“Not a chance, babe,” he says, chuckling, and I know he means it.

“Watch it. You still have a long way to go. I may like you, but I’m not in love with you,” I tell him, even though I know I’m probably not far off.

“Don’t worry, Lucy. I’m not in love with you either,” he responds. “At least not yet.”

My heart flutters at the implications of his words, and apparently they’re enough for the both of us, because we continue to lie there in silence. I smile into the darkness when Kale’s hand settles protectively on my stomach. For the first time since I took that pregnancy test, I feel completely at ease, and I’m more than excited at the prospect of a future with Kale.