The Drowned Boy

40

The cold weather arrived finally in December, with heavy frosts.

The puddles had a top layer of paper-thin ice in the morning, the grass stood like pins, and hoarfrost covered the bare silver branches. Tommy, Carmen, and Nicolai slipped in and out of his mind. The case was due to be heard on June 24, but new cases took priority. Because people never stopped; they flared up at the slightest offense. They shot each other with guns and stabbed each other with knives. Then they said that they hadn’t meant to. I didn’t want this to happen, he provoked me, fell onto the knife, it was him or me. In all honesty, it was self-defense. I plead not guilty, because it was all a terrible accident, and I deeply regret it. A couple of thousand people disappeared or were reported missing every year, but most of them turned up again safe and sound. They often gave vague explanations of where they had been and what they had done. Thousands of convicted criminals evaded prison, failed to return from prison leave, or simply went on the run before being convicted. Some were found floating in swimming pools, others under a tree in the woods. Always, he mused, almost always under a tree. And the circumstances were not necessarily suspicious. Many had made the same choice as Nicolai. A fast and dramatic exit from time.

He had his operation on January 20.

It took place at eight o’clock in the morning at Oslo University Hospital, and he was more nervous than he liked to admit. His heart was racing as they wheeled him into the operating room, ten milligrams of Valium having no apparent effect. He was a big man. The white light on the ceiling blinded him, so he closed his eyes. He said a silent prayer, and then immediately felt ashamed. He didn’t believe in anything, certainly not a higher power. But now he had no other comfort than his pathetic prayer. Let everything go well; help me get through this. And a wretched, embarrassed amen.

They had decided to use the gamma knife and he was grateful for it. When he came to, the first thing he felt was immense relief that it was all over. He had struggled with the dizziness for so long, and now his head felt clear and light. He was allowed to go home right away. Ingrid came to collect him and they went back to her house for something to eat. Frank was waiting there, and he was overjoyed to see him.

“Next time there’s something wrong, don’t wait so long,” Ingrid reprimanded him. “You’re impossible.”

He raised his hand and promised.