Eeny Meeny

38

Everybody has to draw the line some time. And for Jake that time was now. This was not pleasant or fun or even professional any more, it was a nasty situation that was getting out of control. He’d been with a client when she turned up, but she didn’t seem to care. She had sat outside his flat, face turned to the floor, whilst Jake finished his session. But the mood had been well and truly broken and he’d had to promise his disgruntled client a free session just to get him out of the door. This kind of thing wasn’t good for business – the S&M scene on the south coast is a small world and word soon gets around.

She apologized, but she didn’t mean it. She was incoherent and emotional. Jake wondered if she’d been drinking and asked her as much. She didn’t like that, reminding him that he was a dominator not a doctor. He’d let that one go, didn’t want to provoke her, and suggested a short, mild session today as a way of calming things down. Then perhaps they could talk.

But she wasn’t having any of that. She wanted a full one-hour, no-holds-barred session. She wanted as much pain as he could muster. More than that she wanted abuse – she wanted him to tell her that she was evil and ugly, a useless piece of shit, who should be killed or worse. She wanted him to destroy her.

When he refused she got angry, but he had to be honest. Some people he would have happily degraded – whatever floats your boat – but not her. It was not just that he liked her, it was also that he knew instinctively that this wasn’t what she needed. He’d often wondered if she took therapy elsewhere – if she didn’t he was tempted to suggest it. Rather than escalating their sessions to yet another level of extremity, Jake felt it was time to draw a line and suggest some complementary avenues for her to explore.

‘Are you fucking kidding me?’ Helen exploded. ‘How dare you tell me what to do?’

Jake was taken aback by the force of the explosion.

‘It’s just a suggestion and if it’s not for you that’s fine. But I don’t feel comfortable going in this dir-’

‘You don’t feel comfortable! You’re a bloody whore, for God’s sake. You’re comfortable with whatever I pay you to do.’

She was marching towards him and for a moment, Jake thought she was going to attack him, such was the level of her fury. He always had a Taser tucked away close by but he’d never had to use it. How ironic would it be if he had to use it now on her? But thankfully, just as Jake was edging towards it, she turned on her heel and marched out of the flat, slamming the door fiercely behind her.

Jake fought the urge to go after her. They weren’t friends, she was just a client. He’d crossed that line before and lived to regret it. Best cut her off now and not look back. He had liked her but hadn’t asked to be abused. He was too long in the tooth to put up with that. With a sigh he dropped the blinds and shut her out of his life for good.