Little Boy Blue

18

He was rooted to the spot. He knew it was coming, but even so it was a shock. The newscaster was only relaying information that had been buzzing around internet chat rooms for hours, but hearing it relayed in her professional monotone was still disquieting.

Nobody else in the office seemed to be paying attention to the radio bulletin, but he drank in every word: ‘A popular S &M club… appealing for witnesses… the victim has not yet been formally identified.’ He knew the victim’s name of course, but did the police too? Was their ‘failure’ to identify him just a smokescreen as they pursued their enquiries or were they genuinely in the dark? He suddenly realized how much he needed to know.

He had been careful to conceal their connection, but who knew what they were able to access these days? Terrorism had a lot to answer for, providing the police with the perfect excuse to snoop on everything and everyone. He had never used the computer at home and had never contacted Jake via direct text, but even so he suddenly had the unnerving feeling that he hadn’t been careful enough.

The newscaster had moved on to local traffic and travel, but still he didn’t move. Things seemed to be moving fast now and he was suddenly aware of how much he had to lose. Would they suspect him? Or would his middle-class exterior and respectable job shield him from suspicion? He was too far into this, too stained by his actions, for this to unravel. There were two sides to him – but they were known only to him – and that was the way it had to stay.

He was so deep in thought that at first he didn’t notice his PA marching across the room towards him. He might have remained there for hours were it not for her sudden intrusion.

‘Your ten o’clock is here,’ she said testily.

He didn’t respond, didn’t trust himself to. Instead, he gathered up his files, nodded at her and walked purposefully away towards the meeting room.