The Sandman

134

Saga’s heart is pounding in her chest. She can’t make any sense of her thoughts as she gets off the running machine. It’s not her job to protect other patients. She knows she mustn’t step out of her role as a schizophrenic patient.

‘I can break his kneecaps,’ she tries. ‘I can break his arms and fingers and—’

‘It would be better if he just died,’ Jurek concludes.

‘Come on,’ she says quickly to Bernie. ‘The camera’s hidden here—’

‘Snow White, what the fuck?’ Bernie snivels, moving closer to her.

She grabs hold of his wrist, pulls him closer and breaks his little finger. He screams and sinks to his knees, clutching his hand to his stomach.

‘Next finger,’ she says.

‘You’re both mad,’ Bernie sobs. ‘I’ll call for help... my skeleton slaves will come...’

‘Be quiet,’ Jurek says.

He walks over to the running machine and removes the lead, yanking it out from the skirting board, sending a shower of concrete dust over the floor.

‘Next finger,’ Saga tries.

‘Just stand back,’ Jurek says, looking her in the eye.

Saga remains where she is, with one hand against the wall, as Bernie follows Jurek.

The situation feels absurd as she watches Jurek tie the lead round the handle on the side of the door facing the dayroom and throw it over the top of the door.

She feels like shouting out.

Bernie looks at her beseechingly as he climbs onto the plastic chair and puts the noose round his neck.

He tries to talk to Jurek, smiling and repeating something.

She stands there, immobile, thinking that the staff must surely see them now. But no guards come. Jurek has been in the unit for so long that he’s learned their routines by heart. Maybe he knows that this is when they have a coffee break, or change shifts.

Saga moves slowly towards her own room. She doesn’t know what she’s going to do, can’t understand why no one’s come in.

Jurek says something to Bernie, waits a while, repeats the words, but Bernie is shaking his head as tears spring to his eyes.

Saga keeps walking backwards with her heart pounding. A sense of unreality is spreading through her body.

Jurek kicks the chair away, then walks through the dayroom straight into his own room.

Bernie is dangling in the air, with his feet only just off the floor, trying to pull himself up with the lead, but he isn’t strong enough.

Saga goes into her room, walks over to the door and its reinforced glass window. She kicks at it as hard as she can, but all she can hear is a muffled thud from the metal. She pulls back, turns and kicks again, backs up and kicks, then kicks again. The solid door vibrates slightly, but the heavy sound of her kicks carries into the concrete walls. She goes on kicking, until finally she hears agitated voices in the corridor, followed by rapid footsteps and the whirr of the electric lock.