The Little Book of Stoicism

Practice 20

What Do You Have to Show for Your Years?

“Nobody works out the value of time: men use it lavishly as if it cost nothing. But if death threatens these same people, you will see them praying to their doctors . . . you will see them prepared to spend their all to stay alive . . . We have to be more careful in preserving what will cease at an unknown point.” – Seneca

We forget we’re mortal.

We live as if we’re going to live forever. Until we realize we’re not. And that’s when we wish we had started earlier to actually live.

People are prepared to give everything to stay alive. But when they are alive, they squander their time. Unaware that it will cease any moment.

“You are living as if destined to live forever, your own frailty never occurs to you; you don’t notice how much time has already passed, but squander it as though you had a full and overflowing supply—though all the while that day which you are devoting to somebody or something may be your last. You act like mortals in all that you fear, and like immortals in all that you desire.”

This last sentence, that we act like mortals in everything we fear and like immortals in all we desire—it’s been true for me. And I’m considered a person who’s been taking many risks. Building a business, quitting a secure job, selling everything, moving abroad, and trying to write a book.

And still I feel fear is holding me back. And still I feel there will be enough time for the things I truly want to do. I guess that’s a human thing to do.

But if we’re aware of it, if we know about this tendency to behave as we’re going to live forever, we can remind ourselves of our mortality, we can counter steer, even do what we fear, and make sure we purposefully fill up our years with great experiences.

It’s not about not playing video games, not watching TV, not working full-time—it’s about the awareness and purposefulness we bring into these things. We can still choose to do whatever we think is worth spending our time with.

Let’s ask ourselves, though: Do we spend our time with what we think is right? Or are we going to be the person praying to the doctor, willing to give all we have for a few more months?

Are we going to be the person not ready to die when it’s time? Thinking there are so many more things we wanted to do in our time alive? Full of regrets of what we’ve missed?

If you look back now at your life, have you lived sufficiently? What do you have to show for your years? What else do you want to experience? Who do you want to be in this world?

I want to make sure that I can look back and say: “Yes, I made the most of it. I lived well. I savored every drop of my life.” It’s not about trophies and status, but about making progress as a person, growing into a mature human being, thriving in my deep values of calm, patience, justice, kindness, perseverance, humor, courage, and self-discipline.

The best possible self I see in my imagination—I want to spend my days living up to this ideal, trying to be as good as I can be, so that I get as close to it as possible.

I want to make the best with my waking hours. Well aware that life can be taken away at a snap.

The Stoics say it’s not about the years you live, but about how you live those years. As Cato the Younger put it beautifully: “The value of good health is judged by its duration, the value of virtue is judged by its ripeness.”

“It’s possible,” Seneca adds, “for a person who has had a long life to have lived too little.”

Let’s make sure we spend our time wisely so that we can look back with a content smile rather than a regretful sigh.