Why Men Love Bitches

INDEX

abrasiveness, 225–26

accessibility, 5, 31–35, 206–9

affection

giving, 115

showing in public, 66, 67

aging, xv, 225

appearance, xv

assertiveness, 47–51

attitude

about self, 12–14

independent, 221–26

attractiveness, 13–14

availability, 5, 31–35, 206–7, 208–9

bathrooms, sharing with men, 85

behavior

danger-seeking, by men, 218–19

mothering, 37–41, 126–31

overly accommodating, 217–18

pulling back, 10–11

bitch

characteristics of, 20–23

communication style of, 93, 94–96, 215–16

described, xii-xiv, 19–20, 214–16

independent attitude of, 221–26

je ne sais quoi of, 18–20

reasons men prefer, 166–69

strong will of, 226–27

blame, shifting, 133–34

booty call, 33–34

boyfriends, talking about past, 72, 95–96

chase, thrill of, 26–37

chick flicks, 150–51

chores, getting help with, 141–44

clothing, provocative, 15–17

communication

bitch style of, 93, 94–96, 215–16

male view of female, 150–51

talking too much, 93–94, 152–56

through actions, 92–93

vagueness in, 93, 95–96

compliments, 22, 66–67

confidence, 12–14, 17, 73, 221–26, 227

confrontations, avoiding public, 86–87

conversations

See also communication

mystery in, 95–96

revealing self in, 97–98

short, 93–95

cooking, 6–8, 201–5

criticism, 83

dates

ending, 36

last minute, 31–35, 122, 205–7

paying on, 82–83, 185–86, 187–88

showing appreciation on, 185–86, 188, 190–91

dating, thrill of chase

during, 26–37

dignity 20

e-mails, 114

edginess, 18–20

ego, male, 76–89

making friends with, 80–82

making him feel manly and, 77, 78

maneuvering around the, 83–87

praise and, 79, 80–82

public confrontations and, 86–87

emotional dependence, 49–50

emotions. See feelings

fear

of losing man, 19–20, 118

male, of loss of freedom, 42–47

feelings

avoiding sappy, 111–15

male aversion to talking about, 150–51

not showing your, 144–48

reasons men hide their, 156–60

talking too much about, 152–56

financial independence, 174–85, 193

male feelings about, 175–84

respect and, 180–85

self-esteem and, 177–78

flirting, 66

freedom, male fear of losing, 42–47

friends

dumping, for man, 102

treating men like, 136–37

gifts, 186, 190–91

guilt, using to manipulate, 146

household chores, 141–44

housekeeping issues, 83–85, 122–23, 130

humility, 13

humor, 22

humor, sense of, 209–12

impressed, not being easily, 198

impressions, trying too hard to make, 116–23

independence

attitude of, 221–26

financial, 21, 174–85, 193

maintaining your, 102–10

inner strength, 221–26

insecurity 152, 153

interests, maintaining own, 102–10, 196–99, 201

life, maintaining own, 102–10, 196–99, 201

longing, 22

love, ways to tell if he’s in, 169–70

lovers, lying about past, 72

male ego, 76–89

making friends with, 80–82

making him feel manly and, 77–78

maneuvering around the, 83–87

power and the, 86–89

praise and, 79, 80–82

public confrontations and, 86–87

Mama/Ho complex, 37–41

martyr, 146

men

being taken for granted by, 128–30, 139–40, 201–5

danger-seeking behavior of, 218–19

desire for challenge by, 12

desire for sex by, 59–61

fear of losing freedom of, 42–47

figuring out hidden agenda of, 97–98

helping to form good habits in, 90–91

nature of, 26–27

pulling back behavior by, 10–11

reasons for playing cool by, 156–60

thrill of chase for, 26–37

mental challenge

altering routine and, 199–209

male desire for, xiv , 4–5, 6

renewing, 196–212

sense of humor and, 209–12

money issues

appreciation for male spending, 185–87, 190–91

financial independence, 174–85

loans, 191–93

paying on dates, 82–83, 185–88

splitting costs, 187–90

mothering behavior, 37–41, 126–31

mystery retaining, 21, 95–96

nagging

indifference instead if, 136–48

as male reassurance, 132–33

over chores, 141–44

predictability of, 136

styles of, 135

uselessness of, 126–32, 134

vs. maneuvering, 83–87

neediness

financial, 183

male aversion to, 18–20

signs of, 78, 107, 152–56

needs, being direct about, 109–10

negative attention, 132

negotiation, clever, 89–95

nice girls

accommodating behavior of, 30–32, 217–21

described, 2–3

neediness of, 18–20, 107

niceness quiz, 29–30

opinions, expressing, 47–51

orgasms, faking, 70–71

overcompensation, 3–4, 9, 15, 171

passion, keeping alive, 160–63

phone calls, 10–11, 93, 114, 115, 157, 206–7

pornography 69

power

over self, 108–10

position, 86–90

praise, 79, 80–82

relationships

beginnings of, 9–10

holding your own in, 3–5

keeping passion alive in, 160–63

power position in, 89–91

setting pace of, 107–8

setting tone of, 90–92

talking about, 93–94

talking about past, 95–96

trying too hard in, 116–23

turn offs in, 163–65

romance, keeping alive, 160–63

routine

altering, 199–209

maintaining your, 102–5, 108, 114

sappiness, avoiding, 111–15

self

depletion of, 118–19, 122

faith in, 226–27

focusing on, 196–99

looking out for, 97–99

pleasing, 120–21

staying true to, 102–10

self-confidence, 12–14, 17, 73, 221–26, 227

self-esteem, 177–78, xv

self-perception, 214–15

self-respect, 20, 23

sex

booty calls, 33–34

difference between men and women after, 59–60

easy 26

enjoying, 71

giving mixed messages about, 64, 68

insecurity about, 69

keeping passion alive, 160–63

waiting to have, 54–64

ways to delay, 65–68

sexual tease, 64–68

sexuality

overdoing your, 15–17

secure, 62–63

spark, magic, 58, 73, 160

renewing, 196–212

spontaneity, 31–33

trust, 73–74

turn offs, 163–65

women

See also bitch; nice girls comparisons with other, 14–15, 68–69, 73