The People’s Republic of Desire

90 Advice for Returnees

Many overseas Chinese returnees suffer from reverse culture shock after coming back to China. Often they have difficulty adjusting to their new lives in their homeland. CC is one good example, but her problem mainly comes from social issues, and her coworkers don't cause her trouble. She's a senior manager. Rong is different. He is having trouble getting along with his coworkers and his boss, so he asks me for advice. Surprisingly, I am considered a successful returnee among my peers as well as an expert on returnees issues since I did that big article on returnees that was reprinted several times by the Chinese media and on Chinese Web sites.

"What's happened to me, Niuniu? I feel so isolated at my workplace," says Rong, as we sit in a teahouse. "I see certain problems with the way we do things at the office, so I point out that we do it differently back in the States. But they never take my advice, even though it is obvious that my way is better. It's like nothing I say is valid."

"Well, it is not an easy task to blend back in to your own culture. If you want to be a successful returnee, there are some rules you will have to follow."

Rong listens intently.

"Rule Number One: Never construct a sentence starting with 'When I was in the United States…' People just don't like it. And, frankly, they don't care either. You will only distance yourself with such claims," I say, pretending to be a real expert.

"I see. I didn't realize they didn't like that. I guess I need to keep a low profile."

"Absolutely. Rule Number Two: Never drop English words into your conversation. And never ever ask someone, 'How do you say this in Chinese?'"

"Why?" Rong looks puzzled, as this is something that he does often and without a second thought.

"Even if you have honestly forgotten how to say something in Chinese, the locals tend to think you're faking it. They think you're just showing off and they'll resent it. Sure, they respect your education and experience in the West, but they don't like to have their noses rubbed in it. We are talking about proud, sensitive people. If you come across as too westernized, it can backfire."

"Okay! I've got it. What else?"

"Rule Number Three: Under no circumstances should you wear shorts to meet with your coworkers, even after work. Show them some respect."

Rong looks down at his bare knees below his khaki shorts. "It seems to me that I have to make a few changes. But what about me, Niuniu? What if I don't feel that I am being respected?"

"Okay. This is a tough one. You see, some Chinese think those who have returned to China came back only because they were losers in the West. So you have your work cut out for you. You might want to do some things to hint at your success. For example, you could place your UC Berkeley coffee mug on your desk."

"Oh, that is too contrived," says Rong.

"Okay, I've got a better idea," I say. "Next time you go back to California, see if you can attend one of those political fundraisers. If you can get someone to take a picture of you shaking hands with Governor Schwarzenegger, it may cost you a few thousand dollars, but it will be worth it in the long run. Hang the picture on your office wall and I am sure you'll see the difference immediately."

"So, Rule Number Four: Display photos with big shots."

"Exactly," I say, " Yale University has a China Law Center to train Chinese judges from China. In their brochure there is a photo of Bill Clinton with the center's director. You see, you're not alone, Rong. Even Yale needs help from big shots to promote their prestige in China."