Fried Green Tomatoes at the Whistle Stop Cafe

APRIL 6, 1986

Mrs. Threadgoode started talking the minute Evelyn set one foot in the room.

“Well, honey, Vesta Adcock has lost it. She came into our room about four o’clock this afternoon and grabbed up this little milk-glass slipper that Mrs. Otis keeps her hairpins in, and said, ‘The Lord said if the eye offends thee, pluck it out,’ and with that, she slung it out the window, hairpins and all, and then she left.

“It upset Mrs. Otis something awful. After a while, that little colored nurse, Geneene, came in with Mrs. Otis’s slipper she had gotten out of the yard and told her not to be upset, that Mrs. Adcock had been throwing stuff out of everybody’s room all day … said Mrs. Adcock was as crazy as a betsy bug and not to pay attention to her.

“I tell you, I’m lucky to have the mind I do have, with all that’s going on out here … I’m just living from day to day. Just doing the best I can, and that’s all I can do.”

Evelyn handed her the box of chocolate-covered cherries.

“Oh thank you, honey, aren’t you sweet.” She sat there eating for a moment, pondering a question.

“Do you reckon betsy bugs are crazy, or do people just think they are?”

Evelyn said she didn’t know.

“Well, I know where the expression cute as a bug comes from, because I happen to think there is nothing cuter than a bug … do you?”

“What?”

“Think there’s anything cuter than a bug?”

“I cain’t say I’ve looked at too many bugs to know if they’re cute or not.”

“Well, I have! Albert and I would spend hours and hours looking at them. Cleo had this big magnifying glass on his desk, and we’d find centipedes and grasshoppers and beatles and potato bugs, ants … and put them in a jar and look at them. They have the sweetest little faces and the cutest expressions. After we’d looked at them all we wanted to, we’d put them in the yard and let them go on about their business.

“One time, Cleo caught a bumblebee and put it in the jar for us, and he was a precious thing to look at. Idgie loved bees, but my favorite is the ladybug. That’s a lucky bug. Every bug has a different personality, you know. Spiders are kind of nervous and grumpy, with teeny heads. And I always liked the praying mantis. He’s a very religious bug.

“I could never kill a bug, not after seeing them up close like that. I believe they have thoughts, just like us. Of course, that has its bad side. My snowballs around my house were all dog-eared and eaten up. And all my gardenia bushes are chewed down to the nub. Norris said he wanted to come over there and spray, but I didn’t have the heart to let him do it. I’ll tell you one thing, a bug wouldn’t stand a chance at Rose Terrace. A germ would be hard pressed to survive in this place. Their motto here is: ‘It’s not enough to look clean, it’s got to be clean.’ Sometimes I feel like I’m living in one of those cellophane sandwich bags, like the ones they used to sell on the trains.

“As for me, I’ll be glad to get home to my nasty old bugs. Even an ant would be a welcome sight. I’ll tell you one thing,honey, I’m glad I’m on the going-out end, instead of coming-in … ‘My Father’s house has many mansions and I’m ready to go.’ …

“The only thing I ask is, please, Lord, get rid of all the lineoleum floors before I get there.”