Can't Wait to Get to Heaven

Telling Lies

As Linda Warren ran through the private hangar at the airport, and boarded the plane, one thought kept running over and over in her head. Aunt Elner is dead. She knew that’s what her daddy had said, but still she couldn’t quite believe it. As the plane took off headed for Kansas City, another wave of guilt hit her as she remembered what she and her father had done to Aunt Elner. Lying about the mice was not the first time she had lied to Aunt Elner, and the first time had been even a worse deception.

Over the years Aunt Elner had had a series of orange tabby cats named Sonny, and seventeen years ago, when her mother and Aunt Elner had gone to visit Aunt Elner’s niece Mary Grace, Linda had volunteered to stay in her house and take care of Sonny number six while she was away. But on the second day, the cat disappeared. Linda had been frantic and had called her daddy in hysterics, and for the next four days she and Macky had looked everywhere, but had not found him, nor had he come home. On the sixth day, when they realized he was gone for good, they were now both frantic because they knew how upset Aunt Elner would be when she came home and he was not there. They started calling all the humane societies and pet stores within a hundred miles, looking for an orange cat to replace Sonny.

Finally a woman from the Poplar Springs Humane Society called them back and said they had a male orange tabby cat over there named Marmalade that a woman had to get rid of because he was clawing up all her furniture. She and her daddy had jumped into the car and rushed over to see him, and thank heavens, although he was younger, and a few pounds heavier, Marmalade was the spitting image of Sonny. They grabbed him and rushed back to Elmwood Springs and hoped for the best. When Aunt Elner came home and saw him, all she had said was that Sonny certainly looked well fed, and thanked her. They had not told Norma a thing, because she would never have been able to keep a secret, and they had held their breath for the next two days, and both had breathed a sigh of relief when Aunt Elner called and said, “Linda, old Sonny sure must have missed me, because he is being so sweet, all he wants to do night and day is sit in my lap.”

Things went smoothly, until six months later when they had another close call. One morning Aunt Elner had called Macky and said, “Macky, Sonny is going to have to be fixed again, the first time must not have taken, because he’s spraying all over the house.” When Macky had picked him up and taken him to Dr. Shaw, Abby, the vet’s wife and assistant, had been puzzled.

“I have it on my records that he was already neutered, eleven years ago.”

“That was another Sonny,” Macky said, “but don’t tell her.”

Abby and Dr. Shaw had gone along with it, thank goodness. And Aunt Elner never knew that Sonny number six was really Sonny number seven, and because of their lie, Aunt Elner thought she had a twenty-five-year-old tomcat and had bragged on him to everyone. “Look what good shape he’s in,” she had said. “Why, in cat years he must be way over a hundred and fifty years old!” Of course, Linda and her father had felt terrible every time she said it, and were both horrified when she had her picture in the paper holding what she thought was a twenty-five-year-old cat, but there was nothing they could do.

Linda made her mind up right then and there and as soon as the plane landed, even though she did not particularly like cats, she took out her cell phone and called her daughter. “Hi, sweetheart, Momma will be home as soon as I can, and I’m bringing you a kitty when I come.” Apple had been delighted and couldn’t wait until she got back. She had been asking her mother for a cat for a long time, and Aunt Elner would have been pleased to know that Sonny was going to live with her and Apple. It was the least she could do. As she jumped into the car waiting for her at the airport, and sat back, she had another thought: “How old is that cat?”