Don't Worry, Be Grumpy

How Much Are You Worth?

A few years ago, I was flown all the way from Australia to England to deliver a keynote speech at a prestigious human resources conference in London’s Docklands. The fully sponsored trip also meant that I could visit family and friends in the UK.

Fifteen minutes before I was to go up to the podium for the one-hour presentation, one of the organizers told me that there were two people at the entrance to the convention center claiming to be my relatives and trying to get in for free. I went with the manager to check and, sure enough, it was my brother and his daughter. After a minute of sweet-talking, which I am very accomplished at, I convinced the event coordinator to let them in for no charge.

After my session, I scolded my brother and niece for embarrassing me.

“You are a bank manager, brother! And you have a good job too, niece! Why didn’t you just pay the fee?”

Then they told me that the fee was three hundred pounds each just to listen to me for sixty minutes.

My annoyance disappeared when I learned how much I was worth. It was replaced by a huge boost in self-esteem.

When I returned home to Australia, I told the committee of my temple about the newly discovered “market rate” for attending one of my talks. They replied diplomatically that I was worth far more than three hundred pounds per hour per person. “You are priceless,” the committee proposed, seconded, and unanimously agreed upon. That means they still don’t charge anyone to attend any of my talks.

So how much are you worth? Same as me, you are “priceless.”

A week after my return, I received another invitation to give a keynote address, this time at the annual convention of the British National Health Service in Birmingham, UK. Again, the organizers would pay all the costs. I declined, arguing that it is very unhealthy to make such long trips too frequently and so, as they were the British National Health Service, it would be hypocritical of me to attend.