Delphi Complete Works of Anton Chekhov

SCENE IV.

TRILETZKY, PETRIN AND STCHERBOOK.

PETRIN (comes out of the house arm in arm with Stcherbook). You just put before me fifty thousand roubles, and I’d steal the money... Upon my word, I’d steal it. ... If only I could do it without being caught ... I’d steal it... And if the money were put before you, you’d steal it too.

STCHERBOOK. NO, I wouldn’t, Gerasya! No, not I! PETRIN. I’d steal even a rouble! Honesty? Bah! Who wants your honesty? An honest man is a fool.

STCHERBOOK. A fool, am I? . . . Well, I’m a fool, then. . . .

TRILETZKY. Here is a rouble a piece for you, old ones! (Gives them the money.) PETRIN (taking the money). I’ll take it...

STCHERBOOK (laughing, takes the money). Merci, Mister Doctor!

TRILETZKY. Have you been bibbing, esteemed gentlemen?

PETRIN. A trifle.

TRILETZKY. Well, here’s another rouble for you. That’s to pay for prayers for your souls. Sinners, aren’t you? Take it. Properly, one ought to thumb one’s nose at you, but for the sake of the holiday I’ll be generous, the deuce take it! [Here’s still another rouble for the pair of you, because both of you put together aren’t worth a two-hundredth of this rouble!]

ANNA PETROVNA (in the window). Triletzky, give me a rouble too! (Withdraws from sight.)

TRILETZKY. I’ll give you not one rouble, but five; you being a major general’s widow! In a jiffy! (Goes into the house.)

PETRIN (looks at the window). Has the fairy hidden herself?

STCHERBOOK. Yes, she’s hidden herself. PETRIN. I can’t stand her! She’s not a good woman. Too much pride. ... A woman ought to be quiet, respectful... (He shakes his head.) Have you seen Glagolyev? Isn’t he a scare-crow? He sits like a mushroom on one spot, all silent, staring with his eyes! Is that the way to court the ladies?

STCHERBOOK. He’s out to marry one! PETRIN. He marry? When? A hundred years from now? I most humbly thank you! A hundred years from now wouldn’t appeal to me.

STCHERBOOK. What can he, an old man, be thinking of, marrying at his age? [And he wants to marry her, what cheek!] If he fancies marrying, why doesn’t he marry some simple soul? [What does she want of such a stick for a husband? Never fear, if she marries him, it won’t be for love of him. It’s his wealth that’ll tempt her... And] he’s no match for her... She’s young, fiery, an educated European lady. . . .

PETRIN. If he’d only marry! I can’t tell how much I’d give to see them married! Why, since the general died — the Kingdom of Heaven be his! — they have almost nothing. She has some mines, but Vengero- vitch has his eyes on them... How am I to compete with Vengerovitch? What’s the good of my protesting my note now . . . what will I get?

STCHERBOOK. Nihil.

PETRIN. But if she’d only marry Glagolyev, then I’d know where to get my money... I’d protest my note, put a distrainer on the property... Never fear, she won’t let her step-son lose out, she’ll pay up. Ah-h-h! May my dream come to pass! Sixteen thousand, Pavotchka?

STCHERBOOK. And three thousand for me... My worthy spouse has ordered me to get it... How am I to get it? I can’t ask for it. It isn’t as if they were moujiks... They are friends... Let her go herself and collect the money... Let’s go into the wing, Gerasya. PETRIN. Why?

STCHERBOOK. There are women dancing in there. . . .

PETRIN. And is Dunyasha in the wing?

STCHERBOOK. Yes, she’s there. (They go.) It’ll be cheerful with them... (Sings.) How unhappy am I, no longer living there!

PETRIN. Tick-tock, tick-tock... (Shouts.) Ye-s-s! (Sings.) The new year joyously we meet in a gathering of friends true... (Exit.)