Light and dark

[129]

RULED BY a momentary impulse, O-Nobu was unable to suppress the lie that escaped her lips.

“I’ve heard about it from Yoshikawa-san’s wife as well.”

As she spoke, O-Nobu became aware of her own boldness. Her only choice, halting there, was to observe the result of her daring. As she watched, the embarrassment that had reddened O-Hide’s face was replaced by a strikingly different look of puzzlement.

“Goodness! All about what?”

“About that!”

“What do you mean by that?”

O-Nobu had nowhere to go. O-Hide had room to advance.

“I think you’re fibbing.”

“I’m not. About Tsuda.”

O-Hide didn’t respond. But a hint of ridicule played about her pert mouth. It was displayed less guardedly than the last time, and O-Nobu, observing this, felt that she had stumbled off the road and stepped into a muddy field. If she hadn’t been so incorrigibly a sore loser, she might well have bowed her head to O-Hide and asked for her help. O-Hide spoke.

“It’s so odd. What reason can Mrs. Yoshikawa have had to talk about Tsuda?”

“Hideko-san, it’s the truth.”

O-Hide laughed aloud for the first time.

“I’m sure it is — I don’t want you to think I’m doubting you — but whatever are we talking about? Truly.”

“About Tsuda.”

“But what about him? What about my brother?”

“I can’t say. You have to tell me.”

“But that’s so unreasonable. Tell you what, I haven’t the foggiest.”

O-Hide appeared to stand her ground calmly, ready for anything. O-Nobu’s underarms began to sweat. Abruptly she launched out.

“Hideko-san, you’re a Christian, aren’t you?”

O-Hide appeared surprised.

“Certainly not.”

“I don’t think you could have said the things you said yesterday otherwise.”

The state of affairs had turned, reversing their positions from the day before. It was now O-Hide who appeared to be in command with room to maneuver.

“I couldn’t have? Fine, have it your way. I assume you hate Christianity?”

“On the contrary. That’s why I’m appealing to you. Because I want you to take pity on me. In the same noble spirit as yesterday. If I behaved badly, look! I bow to you in apology.”

O-Nobu placed both hands on the tatami in front of O-Hide, the jewel in her ring sparkling on her finger, and, true to her word, bowed her head deeply.

“Please, Hideko-san, please be honest with me. Please tell me everything. You see me opening myself to you. You see my deep regret.”

As she arched her eyebrows in the customary gesture, tears spilled from her small eyes onto her lap.

“Tsuda is my husband. And you’re his sister. Just as he’s important to you, he’s important to me. So for Tsuda’s sake, for Tsuda’s sake, please tell me everything. Tsuda loves me. Just as he loves you as a sister, he loves me as his wife. So as someone loved by him I have to know everything for his sake. And since he loves you, too, I know you’ll tell me everything for his sake. Won’t you? That’s an act of kindness by you as his sister. Even if you don’t feel any kindness toward me at this point, I won’t resent you for it one little bit. But I know there’s still kindness in you toward your brother. I can see in your face that you’re filled with kindness toward him. I know you’re not a cold, indifferent person. Yesterday you said yourself that you’re a kind person, and I’m certain it’s true.”

Having said this much, O-Nobu looked at O-Hide and observed an extraordinary change in her face. From flushed she had gone slightly pale. In a rush of words that seemed excessive, she spoke as if to gainsay as quickly as possible what O-Nobu had said.

“As far as I’m concerned, I have nothing to feel ashamed of. I have only the best of intentions toward my brother and toward you. I have no ill will! Just so there’s no misunderstanding.”